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Original poster

suddenly irresistible to younger men

53 replies

Fancyachippy · 20/11/2020 20:22

I am 53 and have just come out of a 17 year relationship. I don't want the whole live in/life long partner thing again. Not quite sure what I want but dipped my toe into OLD. Went into it with a very open mind and a huge age range (mid 30s to 60s).
In my younger days I was never that attractive. OK but nothing special. When I hit mid forties the weight dropped off me, I got cheekbones and suddenly I became prettier with a much better figure than I had ever had before.
Here's the thing - all the guys who are most interested in me are around 35 years - and there's loads of them and gorgeous too. Should I just go for it and enjoy some sex with some guys who I would never have been able 'to pull' in my younger days or is there a huge risk that I am just going to feel like an old slapper and just 'an experience' for a younger guy? In so many ways I just want to go for it but I am scared I am going to feel my age and ultimately end up feeling used.

OP posts:
SmileyClare · 21/11/2020 00:21

Maybe the younger guys on OLD are the ones willing to ignore a covid lockdown and shag a different woman every weekend.

Alternatively, the gorgeous 30 something men are balding overweight chancers putting up an old photo. I think it's worth applying some cynicism.

Redland12 · 21/11/2020 00:26

I am 62, 43 years with Ex, now separated, 5’10 and blonde cropped hair? Looking good. I am on OLD and I am having the time of my life! It’s amazing how young guys want older women! And long may it continue!! The sex is fantastic with these fit young Adonis’s I cannot believe my luck when I see this naked gorgeous guy in my bed! Some have become FWB! Go for it, enjoy it, there’s no harm in it, you are consenting adults. I am in absolute heaven! 😈

jessstan1 · 21/11/2020 00:41

I had men coming out of the wallpaper when I was late forties to early fifties. At work, on trains, in the supermarket....all sorts of ages.

It happens because you are confident and attractive. Enjoy the attention but don't let it go to your head.

Dontletitbeyou · 21/11/2020 01:59

Go out there , have fun and enjoy yourself . Bear in mind that lots of younger guys are attracted to older women , mainly for sex of course . Very few looking for any type of relationship or commitment , but if you are ok with that , and don’t want or expect anything more , then absolutely go for it .
As for feeling like an old slapper , why would you ? Lots of people out there have casual relationships , I don’t see them as being old slappers . Just make sure it’s on equal terms,ie not letting them call all the shots , and remain in control

RAOK · 21/11/2020 02:27

What are you waiting for?! Nobody will judge because nobody (judgy anyway!) will know. My FWB has Mrs Robinson fantasies. I hope you have lots of amazing sex and adventures!

Needhelp101 · 21/11/2020 02:33

@SmileyClare

Maybe the younger guys on OLD are the ones willing to ignore a covid lockdown and shag a different woman every weekend.

Alternatively, the gorgeous 30 something men are balding overweight chancers putting up an old photo. I think it's worth applying some cynicism.

Of course, you're right. To be honest, I apply cynicism to everything.

But in my experience, there are a LOT of young men looking for an older woman. For sex, obviously, don't expect anything more. I'm not looking for anything more, so that suits me.

But, people are people. If you like and fancy each other, and are honest with each other, what's the harm? Young (kind, feminist, hot) men can be a lot of fun 😉

Opentooffers · 21/11/2020 02:36

If you put in a big age range, you will get the young ones. Sorry to burst your bubble, but nothing to do with how you look. That's why you have to be selective with OLD, unless a sleazeball is what you want.

Chocaholic9 · 21/11/2020 02:37

I think I'd have to go for it out of curiosity, just to see what they were all after!

NiceGerbil · 21/11/2020 02:42

Ha! Me too!

It's so weird.

I (being honest here) was attractive when young. Not beautiful but pretty. The attention i got on the whole I did not like. Having certain attributes seems to encourage the sort of men who like to follow late at night, shout obscenities etc etc. I didn't like it.

On the street I'm generally invisible now which is great as far as I'm concerned. But young men I meet/ work with are really flirty. It's so weird.

I'm married so not interested. But I'd say if you can separate sex from the rest then definitely go for it. Why the fuck not?

And ignore the oh they fancy you because you're old and past it stuff. Since when did young men put in an effort to flirt with women they aren't attracted to?

Enjoy it op!

(PS I'm loving my newfound cheekbones too!)

Needhelp101 · 21/11/2020 02:44

I've turned down two (long term) guys tonight, because I would rather have a 🍷 and watch Sense and Sensibility 😁

Hailtomyteeth · 21/11/2020 02:44

OP, do it. Protect your heart from breakage, your finances from assault and your body from disease and do what you want to do.

WitchesSpelleas · 21/11/2020 02:46

Just don't, whatever you do, 'lend' them any money. No matter how convincing the pretext or heartrending the sob story.

Needhelp101 · 21/11/2020 02:46

And, you know, lockdown 🤨

NiceGerbil · 21/11/2020 02:48

Missed the OLD part.

I have no experience with that but my friends are not keen.

You'll probably turn up and they're 70 or something!

I'd say. Agree to meet but just for a short while first. Make it clear that's all you want. That should weed out the really awful offers.

I mean even if it's just sex it's hardly unreasonable to meet a few times first. They are strangers after all.

Make sure someone knows where you are etc.

I still think real life is a better way of meeting someone. Lockdown aside of course!

RAOK · 21/11/2020 02:53

@Hailtomyteeth

OP, do it. Protect your heart from breakage, your finances from assault and your body from disease and do what you want to do.
Great mantra 😍
TinySongstress · 21/11/2020 02:58

I recently had a fling with a younger man. Completely wrong for me relationship wise, mature for his age (mid 20's, I'm 39) but not at the life stage I'm at so we would never have been 'a thing'.
The sex was fucking sensational. SENSATIONAL.
I've never looked twice at a younger man really, he did all the chasing. I thought it was a joke at first and then thought 'aah, sod it. Treat yourself'
We're still 'friends'. He got what he wanted, certainly, but so did I. Wink

FortunesFave · 21/11/2020 03:05

SO much misogyny here!

OP some men just like older women...it's fine! Why not? As long as you use protection...go for it.

StarlightLady · 21/11/2020 07:34

I’ve had younger men (l’m early 40s) make a play for me. Sometimes l have gone for it.

My advice is go for it if you want to, but keep your head while they are giving it.

KarmaNoMore · 21/11/2020 07:35

Every woman who I know dating men much younger than herself is dating one present in @EarthSight’s list above.

.and all have a broken heart because the guy has a serious girlfriend their age who takes priority about them, and their are so convinced they are loved by the guy that are happy to believe the guy is being coerced to stay or even walk down the aisle with the younger girl and forced to keep the relationship with the older woman secret.

RAOK · 21/11/2020 08:01

@TinySongstress

I recently had a fling with a younger man. Completely wrong for me relationship wise, mature for his age (mid 20's, I'm 39) but not at the life stage I'm at so we would never have been 'a thing'. The sex was fucking sensational. SENSATIONAL. I've never looked twice at a younger man really, he did all the chasing. I thought it was a joke at first and then thought 'aah, sod it. Treat yourself' We're still 'friends'. He got what he wanted, certainly, but so did I. Wink
😍😍😍
Isitreally77 · 21/11/2020 08:12

Personally I'd draw the line at 10 years younger and even then I'm questioning what they see in someone 10 years older than them who is at a different stage in their life. At 43 I can party like a 30 year old and have friends who are that age but I wouldn't date them or sleep with them. I'm chatting to someone who is 35 but we are at the same stage in life (my ex is 36 so it isn't that much different).

MikeUniformMike · 21/11/2020 08:24

They are just looking for a shag, @Fancyachippy. Why don't you look for a man who is not young enough to be your son.

I too seem to be irresistible to younger men. I'm not exactly gorgeous.

StarlightLady · 21/11/2020 08:28

A (female) friend once said to me that looking good in your teens and 20s is almost an accident. Looking good in your 40s is something we work hard at to achieve.

MikeUniformMike · 21/11/2020 08:36

People can look good at any age. Ageist talk like that is just yet another way to tell people that they're not good enough.

PussGirl · 21/11/2020 18:27

I get more attention now in my mid fifties from men of all ages. I think because I’m more confident in my looks, style and sexuality than I was as a younger woman.. Also I’m no longer with my twat of an ex husband who ground down my self esteem while also wanting me to look sexy but getting annoyed if other men noticed Hmm

I haven’t had a younger partner at all though. Current DP is mid sixties.