Is anyone there?

[notsurewhattodo22]

I don't know what to do.

I've got no motivation anymore, I've not been out of the house for a week. I can't stop missing and crying about a guy I know never cared. He was a huge part of my life and I feel so lost and lonely.

I'm just so down and don't see a way of snapping out of it.

If anyone will talk to me it would really help.

He wouldn't ignore me..that's why it's hard.

I miss the friendship more than anything.

I really hope I can meet someone later down the line, no idea how though with my confidence being at rock bottom.

Glad you have met someone nice x

The Coronavirus has made everything else so much harder, especially WFH. I miss speaking to my work colleagues and ranting about shit men!

At 13/14 they must be pretty self sufficient, don’t be too hard on yourself. It won’t always be like this. We are all allowed to have crap times, even parents.

That’s good then your getting up, showering and cooking...especially when you are so down. Feel proud of yourself for being able to do that!

So start with baby steps...think be to a time when you felt better, what did you enjoy doing?

Make up always makes me feel better about myself, try and put some mascara on tomor, see how you feel.

Next time you want to get in bed and cry listen to a podcast, lots out there about self esteem etc

My counsellor said to me about journaling and having a worry book. I’ve not done this yet but I am considering it. He also suggested a book called Eat That Frog, which is to help you motivate yourself. It’s currently sat in my Kindle App, not got the motivation to read it yet 😂

Why don’t you book a weekend away with your kids for next year, somewhere local-ish, for something to look forward to ?

Have you spent any time with friends? I had some
Of mine round last night, just got takeaway and had wine and it was nice to just talk crap and have a laugh, rather than focus on the past

Eat that Frog..sounds interesting, will have a look.

I've seen a couple of friends but with lockdown it's difficult now.

I'm not sure what I used to enjoy really. It seems a long time ago I enjoyed much really. Every day is just going through the motions.

I didn't think it was good that I get up, shower and cook but I suppose it's something x

Feeling really low again that I'm in such a mess and he is just indifferent and doesn't care less about us. Makes me feel crazy for it even being an issue. How can he mean so much to me yet I meant so little 😪

I could look into a weekend away, but with coronavirus I'm not sure if we will be allowed to go.

Something that helped me was "acting fine". As in, I started to do things I thought I might enjoy, and got out and about as much as possible (not necessarily easy in current times, I know), smiling and engaging with people instead of shutting myself away. Initially it was a nightmare and a lot of hard work, but it got easier and easier, and then I realised I was actually enjoying life again. It's a bit of "fake it 'til you feel it" but it can and might work.

How are you doing @notsurewhattodo22 ??

How are you?

@lollipoprainbow and incognito thank you for asking about me. How are you? Think you had similar lollipop.

For the first time yesterday I felt a little better, I have cut down my anti depressants as I was sleeping all the time on the higher dose. I think yesterday was the first day I wasn't crying.

My ex has been in touch but with nothing of any substance. Unfortunately I'm not strong enough to block him but I'm realising his texts are meaningless and he just wants attention. Hard though.

The glimmer of hope I can give you is that even though you are reacting very badly to this you may get over it much quicker.
I have reacted v badly to break ups in the past, not in front of the DP.
I've done the crying staying in bed woe is me feeling desperate but after a few days you get fed up of it. You get through the initial pain and after a few weeks you bounce back. You will feel much stronger. Be angry upset cry write it down but don't let him know. Get some control back.

@notsurewhattodo22 doing ok, he came over at the weekend, I'm happy just to have a friendship with him. I agree you get fed up with crying all the time after a while !!

Typically when I'm feeling better he gave me a call today. Do they sense when your moving on?

@notsurewhattodo22 mine does this too ! When I cry and mope about things I don't hear from him and when I'm more upbeat I do !! Maybe they can sense it !!

@lollipoprainbow why? I've been down for weeks and finally getting back to myself and then the call.

Ridiculous. Do they have a 6th sense

Breadcrumbing?

I hope you can be strong and not give him the attention. Or at least be non committal.

Hi i have a dilemma & just after thoughts.. my brother & his gf of 8 years have just separated, they are still friends but that’s it. Do I still buy a small Xmas gift for her... we wasn’t that close but always spent Xmas & celebrations together, I just feel mean cutting her out, but also don’t want to make her feel uncomfortable by giving her a gift. thoughts anyone? Thank you

[quote notsurewhattodo22]@lollipoprainbow why? I've been down for weeks and finally getting back to myself and then the call.

Ridiculous. Do they have a 6th sense[/quote]
Don't let him back in. He's horrible

Many NHS psychiatrists also work privately. It would be worthwhile checking it out with your old psychiatrist OP.

I can identify with you OP, as I'm also going through a heartbreak . I've cried every day for nearly 3 weeks and can't see it getting better anytime soon. All I can do is send you some hugs and say I understand.

In a similar situation. Thought we could stay friends but it seems as if even that is fading now and I'm devastated. I'm going to work but feel like dying to be honest. Don't want to eat, don't sleep.
How are you OP? I have increased my AD's but might need to go up again.

Aw...sorry to the last 2 posters, it really is the worst thing isn't it. I upped my anti depressants but was just sleeping all the time which made me worse ☹ I've cut back to 50mg now of sertraline as was on 200mg.

Horrible with lockdown too isn't it, can't even go out or distract myself. Just on my own all the time.

I'm a little better thank you. I'm going to follow incognito advice and try and not get invested in these phone calls and texts. He isn't interested in reconciling I don't think. I can't bring myself to block him out of my life completely though, pathetic!

I think yesterday was the first day in a month I haven't cried.

@notsurewhattodo22 he's still hung up on someone else why do I always feel I'm never the woman men fall madly in love with !!