A man's opinion

[Traveller2020]

This is a a strange one, my friend has decided to stop dating because she has

haemorrhoids.

In a nutshell she thinks men will not want to have sex with a woman if she has haemorrhoids (we're talking size of a grape here so they are not small according to her)

I told her I don't think that's true for the majority of men but she's adamant it's true for all men.

So this is for all the men on mumsnet...if you had started seeing a woman, would her having haemorrhoids be a turn off for you.

I know everyone will have an opinion but I'm just interested to see what majority of men on here think.

I'm not a man but I had piles when I met my partner as I already had had a baby and he never commented bar to tell me about his so I think she's over thinking it

My wax technician told me that about 90% of the women she waxes have haemorrhoids.

Why doesn’t your friend just get a doctor take care of it? Not for the men, but for herself to feel better.

You're not going to get a lot of male opinions on MN...

I can't see the problem with a few balloon knots now and again!
Everyone will have a worry about something about their body. Its certainly not exclusive to women. Men will worry about the size and shape of their penis. If they have a hairy back or chest. Any number of things. Piles are just a fact of life and I can't say its ever an issue that has arisen in any conversation Ive gad about women.

I only found out a couple of weeks ago that my husband has them. It came up in conversation (can't remember for the life of me how!)

I had no idea. Admittedly it's not an area I go furtling around in. But I'd never have known if he hadn't told me, and I gave not two hoots.

And Mumsnet please include an edit feature on your platform. Its so outdated to not be able to correct typo's.

Your friend can surely date and say not ready for bedroom gymnastics to buy her some time to treat the area.

She perhaps making a drama out of a mole hill....

I wondered why she didn’t just get them treated, must be uncomfortable to live with.

Piles are easily treatable, so while I don't think it would be a dealbreaker for all men, I would definitely not just put up with them.

Just a thought, but is she worried about men expecting/demanding anal sex, and losing interest in her if she won't or can't have it?

@VivaMiltonKeynes

My wax technician told me that about 90% of the women she waxes have haemorrhoids.

Reaaallly?? Jesus. Why??? Childbirth injuries? What???

I'd just ask her if on her deathbed she wants to think about how she missed out on something she wanted because of her bum.

She should go to a GP as they're totally treatable.

@CorianderLord

I'd just ask her if on her deathbed she wants to think about how she missed out on something she wanted because of her bum.

She should go to a GP as they're totally treatable.

😂 I think many of us have missed out on something we wanted because of our bums, but it's usually in the context of not being able to fit it into some nice jeans.

Reaaallly?? Jesus. Why??? Childbirth injuries? What???

I know everyone will have an opinion but I'm just interested to see what majority of men on here think.
I have never had an opinion on women's haemorrhoids and having given it some thought (following your OP) I still don't. Is this a common thing to have opinions on? Am I missing something?

Are they external ones hanging out of her bottom or can you get piles in your vagina?

If it's the size of a grape hanging outside her anus, I'd ask the GP to refer her to have it/them removed.

I was investigated for bowel cancer ( didnt have it) but the bowel specialist told me that people dont understand that piles are completely a normal thing, they are not an abnormality and most people have them either externally or internally to the anus whether they know so or not.

My husband had them for ages and I never knew. Ended up having them removed as they were so annoying for him. I think I've had them now and then. He's never said anything, don't think he cares.

how would a partner know she had them?

Seriously do people really go around feeling each others arses?

@aspecialkindofarsehole

how would a partner know she had them?

Seriously do people really go around feeling each others arses?

Surely it doesn't take much imagination to think of circumstances under which a man might catch sight of (or indeed, feel) the bumhole of the woman he is sleeping with?

@JimmyJabs

Piles are easily treatable, so while I don't think it would be a dealbreaker for all men, I would definitely not just put up with them.

Just a thought, but is she worried about men expecting/demanding anal sex, and losing interest in her if she won't or can't have it?

Men do all sorts nowadays to 'discover' these areas nowadays. It seems the anus has become another genital region - probably due to the fact it's so prevalent in porn, so I can understand why the person posing the question is concerned.

@JimmyJabs should women be worried about men 'expecting/demanding' anal sex? Surely they should be asking permission and gaining consent first anyway? 'If she won't or can't have it' - what about if she doesn't want it?

@MilleniumHallsWalledGarden

Reaaallly?? Jesus. Why??? Childbirth injuries? What???

Yes it is a pregnancy related thing.

I think you've misunderstood what I meant (probably because I worded it poorly). From what I've heard and read, it absolutely is something that men are increasingly asking for, and women are worrying about the expectation that they will be up for it. Perhaps I should have said can't, won't or doesn't want to, but I thought that was included in "won't".

@vivamiltonkeynes That explains it then.