So it's not the first time he's done this but this time my blood has boiled...
So I cant climax through sex or hand stimulation Through sex due to a medical problem that makes my clit painful to touch.(I can do it myself alone but in a way that no one would be able to do)
My husband was getting upset because I never had an orgasm during sex and he felt shamful, I honestly wasn't botherd because my sex drive wasnt high.
We eventually got a rabbit vibrator as It was gentle and didn't hurt me and our sex life got better and I enjoyed it and he felt better, however I noticed he started to hide it because when I went to get it wasn't there or I'd stumble apon it during my cleaning and putting things away(he never hid it well), I never mentioned this because I didn't want to cause an argument, every so often he'd make a remark of I didn't want sex hed say I bet you used that toy, Ive never felt so embarrassed.
Anyway I just treated myself to an even better more expensive toy to help me making my clitorus less painful( like physiotherapy 🤣).
We used it together and it helped me alot and I felt like it was making things less painful, I also made him aware that it's staying in my personal draw and he was fine with that.
But now Im fuming, he made a comment about me using it while he was at work (he was joking and we laughed anout it, because I was like maybe I did)(im litterly on my period.
5 hours later I've gone into my drawer to get somthing and I notice my toy has gone.
I'm furious.....
I know what he's thinking, I'm using it and not sleeping with him....
Our sex life has been consistent for 12 years.
I don't use it without him and I feel like if I did want to use it he is denying me my own pleasure(he might aswell cut my hands off as I could use that to pleasure myself 🤣) , I've never told him not to masturbate and I even bought him a man's toys.
Please no hate.
What do I say, what do I do? I cant ignore it again