Husband keeps doing really stupid stuff

[Fidgetthefluffer]

I’m sorry to keep this really vague as don’t want to be identified. When I met my husband he had signed some legal documents that seriously fucked up our / his lives. He did that because he didn’t read the contract. Trusted the other person..it has caused SO much grief in our lives. we have finally, finally got to a point where we can sort it out - not completely but a lot. I have been overly invested in it all. In fact if it wasn’t for me we wouldn’t have got this far. So I bowed out & left him to it. Was concerned that it was ruining our relationship & I was being too controlling. Well until today when my paranoia took over & I asked to see where contract was at. He’s totally & utterly fucked it again. Been done over & put clauses in that could destroy our lives. I don’t know what to do. The stupidity of the man is unbelievable. I feel I can’t respect him anymore & I’m so over treating him like a child. Do I just walk away? Tell him? I genuinely don’t think he sees anything wrong with what he has signed. It’s almost heart breaking to have to point out how naive he’s been & what the consequences could be.

But who keeps asking him to sign legal documents?

Give obviously lost respect for him now though. That doesn't bode well for the future once you lost respect for your partner.

I wouldn't want to remain legally tied to a person doing that to me, so I would be seeing a solicitor on how to sever all ties and protect myself.

I’d walk away.

Can you divorce him so you are not legally tied to him, then see if he sorts it out, difficult to advise without knowing, could you live separately and still see him. I dumped a boyfriend of 4 years because he couldn't be bothered to sort his divorce out.

What on earth kind of contract is this? And who is talking him into signing things? A friend/family member?

When you say 'destroy your lives' what do you mean? Can you provide some context? Like does it risk your home or job or something?

Divorce him but stay together, so legally your obligations are separate? A friend of mine did this and is still ‘married’ but safer financially. Or just dump him altogether - the lack of respect thing might have killed the relationship off, only you can decide

He sounds useless at contracts. Many people are though and are still competent in other areas. Is your DH otherwise competent and a good partner? If so, just take over that area of your joint affairs. I know many good marriages where one partner does all the finances and the other partner does all the day to day logistics (food shop, children appointments/needs, etc)
I would be more angry at the person who is giving your DH such things to sign. They are taking advantage knowingly and seemingly with the intent to destroy your lives. Whoever they are, you need to cut ties with them as soon as possible, maybe even get legal advice. For example, some contract clauses are not enforceable because they are illegal, and so cannot be used against you.

What type of contract is this? Is it a business partnership/investment thing or something related to his family? Is it the same person / situation as before?

I'm asking because if its a family member who has hoodwinked him that might be more understandable. I mean, it is still very bad but I can see how the emotional ties might blind a person more in that situation.

I'm trying to imagine what contracts he could have signed....

I'd untangle myself from him legally.
There is no point him taking you down with him.

Some contracts are not valid if the person hasn’t taken legal advice. Or maybe it’s that they could be easily challenged.

What does his solicitor say?

Posted too soon.
It's also worth having a professional check the contract to see if it is legal.

Is this regarding an ex?
Business?
Wills?

You don't have to be really specific,but perhaps a few more details would help!

No way I could be married to anyone that dense, sorry.

I'm intrigued as to what on earth this contract could be, and who is seemingly getting one over on him.

I'm not sure you CAN be over invested in protecting yourself legally, surely that's commonsense, especially if your DH has none?!

If the legal contract involves you or family money, you have every right to be involved. He clearly isn't competent so either you take over that side of the relationship or make sure he has legal advice every step of the way....

Is this business contracts? Risking your home or similar? It's very hard when you are so vague!

Someone with that level of self-sabotage is dangerous to be around, imo.

Remove yourself legally from this man. Divorce him and then step back from all his legal shit. You can stay with him if you want to remain in a relationship with him, but separate everything so when it does all go south you aren't affected and can walk away if needed

Could you may hint at what kind of contract this is? Just because it sounds like an odd situation and I can't quite imagine how a contract could ruin your lives - less so twice.

Is this contract with his family?

Are they manipulating him? Blackmailing him? Coercing him?

He only proposed to you in August

@user186428036428936

I wouldn't want to remain legally tied to a person doing that to me, so I would be seeing a solicitor on how to sever all ties and protect myself.

Same here.

How is he signing contracts that affect you, without your knowledge?

This is too cryptic to follow.

Wtf are these contracts for??