I have a sweet oh. Been together 8 years. We have two children. He has never broke my heart. He doesn't cheat or lie. He's a great dad. He will do anything for me in many ways. He's done nothing wrong. But sometimes I feel I'm lacking in what I crave and it's all on me, I know that. The truth is I'm just fed up. We've been stuck together for 6 months. But he's different to me. He's too invested in the people at the top. The intentions of the government. He's so focused on control and us being watched all the time. It's made him rather dull. He's also just happy to work all day and then just slob around all weekend and all evening. Always achy. Always got a back ache. Always tired. Yet he won't sleep in the evenings until gone midnight. He chooses to watch stuff when the kids are asleep.
Ive always been abit of a clown in my spare time. I am very capable of being serious. Being a good listener. Talking about loads of stuff. But I don't like to be serious constantly. I like a giggle. I like someone who sings in the car.who just randomly talks about really funny things. He has no spontaneous side to him. He's never bouncy. He never rolls out of bed and gets showered with a productive plan in place. I've been watching him this week. I've been poorly. He's been off work for a week. He has cooked tea and washed up once a day. He's done the school run. The rest of it he's sat on the sofa with the curtains shut watching crap tele. I've jokingly dug at him today about him being really unproductive this week. No walking. No painting. He cut the grass after I nagged him but he's not weeded so it still looks crap. So many little things he could have done. But he just doesn't want to.
Sometimes I think he's so nice and thoughtful. But he's too serious. He's so sluggish it irritates me. It takes him 45 minutes to poo. Another 40 minutes to shower. So when he goes to get ready it takes forever which irritates us. Yet he won't shower in the evenings or first thing so it doesn't screw the whole day up.
He's got so many lovely qualities.but I am craving some laughter and fun. I can't say he's done anything wrong. I'm not looking at other men either. There is no other man. But sometimes I think is this it? Did I settle for the wrong type. Is this some sort of 7 year itch? I don't mean to a bitch. Its all on me. I don't know what else I can try. Sometimes I pop the music on to e joy whilst I tidy up and he just keeps interrupting me to talk about something he's read and I'm like ughhh I'm in the zone.
Probably will be told I'm horrible. I don't think I can change him really. Maybe itsme who needs to change.i don't know!