DP called me petty

[Flamingosarentreal]

because I "hadn't" cooked his dinner as he hadn't loaded the dishwasher from last night's dinner.
For context his household jobs are- emptying and putting the bins out, recycling collections, mowing the lawn, his own washing and ironing and loading the dishwasher after I have cooked dinner.

He will sometimes sweep the kitchen floor and wipe clean the sink. If asked he will do other jobs such as changing the bed etc but only if asked (he calls it nagging).

He does no other gardening and rarely any DIY- I do that.

Three weeks ago he had left the loading of the dishwasher for three days - no real reason other than he was busy with work (he works 30 hours per week as i do i) and then his hobby and this wasn't the first time. I told him then i wouldn't cook for him if he left the dishwasher unloaded. He left two days worth on Saturday and Sunday , went out for the afternoon to see his dad and came home to no dinner.
Today he called me petty for again not cooking his dinner- although I actually had , just not plated it up but he didn't let me tell him that before he shouted i was petty and stormed off .
So was I?

Oh Gods. I said 'ducks in a row'. (Hangs head in shame). The transformation is complete.

Ridiculous carry on by all parties. Your DC are seeing this? This is the relationship template they may well follow?

Separate, run your own homes, cook your own dinners and load and unload your own dishwashers !

What a way to carry on by both parties and what behaviour to expose your children to.

I couldn't be doing with this. I work at least 40 hours a week and after a full day I still cleaned the bathrooms, bedrooms and changed the bed linen on all the beds. Like everyone else if you live in a house you've got to do stuff. It must feel like living with a child

"We've eaten off paper plates before as there were no clean ones because he hadnt loaded the d/w and i guess i was a bit petty then for not just washing them".

Is this the relationship modelling you think appropriate for your children to see?

[quote Flamingosarentreal]@AnneLovesGilbert
Done the talking , nothing changes on his behalf and I am left with more work but you're right i dont want to live like this but wha#s the answer other than LTB?[/quote]
Does there need to be another answer when you have the perfect answer?

You cannot change a boy twat into a considerate, responsible, loving MAN.

stop trying to make him grow up. It's tedious being the only adult in a relationship.

Blackmail him with no sex unless he pulls his weight. That'll sort him out :-)

It's real turn-off behaviour, anyway. He's probably already experiencing a drought because it's tough trying to feel romantic about someone who routinely skips their chores, leaves a complicated mess for you and gets annoyed when it's noticed.

Men seem to find it hard to make the connection, but the man in the kitchen is also the man in the bedroom: they aren't different people.

They don't call the washing up 'thinking man's foreplay' for nothing, do they? 😉