Is your DH enough?

[Offshoreliving]

Answer me honestly, if you couldn't have kids, would you DH be enough? For this virus, being locked away, for future holidays, retirement, is your life enough? How do you reconcile that that's it for you?

No kids here and I love him to bits .
I'm not sure if you're asking will your marriage survive without kids or if it's okay to settle because of kids . Either way you've phrased it in such a way that the replies might not be helpful .
Are you unhappy with your dh ?

After what had just happened to my poor dsis I would now say I think it’s more important that you learn to be enough for yourself.

Dsis and her ‘D’H couldn’t have children (Dsis was infertile) and she focused all her love, energy and attention on him instead. Until last month they had been married nearly 15 years.

He claimed he loved her and she was enough for him, right up until the moment he left her for the young girl he had got pregnant.

She is in absolute pieces and said to me the other day that now she would do it so differently. Focusing on her career, friends and self a lot more.

Yes, honestly, if he hadn't wanted children, that would not have been a deal-breaker for me and if we couldn't have had kids, I think we would be happy together.

I think I could be equally if very differently happy if we'd chosen otherwise, it would be more difficult if it wasn't a choice but he was very supportive when I said I didn't want to risk another pregnancy ever again, and I would not have had children without someone like him who really wanted to have them and essentially built his career, hobbies, life with the ideal of being a very active father.

Really, as our kids have gotten older and we're able to do more ourselves again, I find new lovable things about him.

Yes. We have fun together. We can chat and laugh about things. He's great.

No

I'm not sure that I really understand the question.

Are you really asking if someone can have a fulfilled life without having children?

I think it's kind of strange to expect one person to be everything to you.

Friends are important.
Extended family are important.
Other interests/hobbies/politics/ambitions are important.

Why hook everything on the romantic partner?

If I didn't have ds then yes dh would be enough.

Yes. We were together 11 years before IVF finally worked, and I was steeling myself for remaining childless. It wouldn’t have been just having DP that would have been sad, it would have been the family life that we’d have together that I’d have mourned, IYSWIM.

Yes, but we both really wanted kids. If we didn't have out own we would definitely have adopted :)

Yes. Without a doubt

Yes, he is. We have been trying to conceive for a few years but we have got nowhere. I wanted to be with him, before l wanted children

Oddly enough my late H and I discussed this before we TTC, and we came to the conclusion that we wouldn't do IVF or adoption, we'd work through our feelings together if kids didn't happen. And yes, he would have been enough.

Of course life happened, we did have kids and he ended up becoming an alcoholic. It would have been a lot easier to split up without kids involved, to be honest - I'd have left earlier.