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Original poster

When to say you love someone

30 replies

Littlebeachhut · 07/08/2020 23:30

Been dating this guy for over a month but when I met him I had this instant feeling. We have this intense connection. We’ve have had the exclusive chat which he started. We’ve both almost said I love you I’m sure little slip ups here and there. If it feels right should I just say it or is it way to soon I don’t want to put him off. It’s a crazy feeling I can’t describe I feel like it’s love at first sight. I get on so well with him and haven’t felt this happy or better about myself around anyone.

OP posts:
Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 07/08/2020 23:54

I’ve never had this feeling and don’t no what to do part of me just wants to say it

OP posts:
TBHno · 08/08/2020 00:02

Life's too short to ignore our feelings. The next time it feels right, just say it. Smile

WinterAndRoughWeather · 08/08/2020 00:03

Aw, this is a nice thread. You’ll both be dying to say it, how exciting. It’s the best feeling when you both finally do.

savingherlife · 08/08/2020 00:04

Say it!

OhYeahYouSuck · 08/08/2020 00:08

DP and I fell in love very quickly, a matter of weeks although we had known each other for a few months by that point, not as a couple though.

When it feels right, it feels right!

LilyWater · 08/08/2020 00:09

Sounds like a great connection and enjoy this moment Smile

However keep in mind you dont actually know him, what you're feeling now is passion and chemistry rather than love. Take the time to get to know him properly and don't become dependent on him.

IdblowJonSnow · 08/08/2020 00:17

I agree its chemistry. However that's no bad thing necessarily. Enjoy the early lusty days!
No advice as to whether to say it or not!

Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 08/08/2020 00:56

Thank you all for your advice we’ve both had bad last relationships which we where both treated badly. Have taken over a year off relationships to spend time on myself and do some dating was born expecting a relationship from it at all but I’m so happy my whole family love him too. I’m enjoying every second so much.

OP posts:
Osirus · 08/08/2020 01:44

It was 3 months in for us, but I’m sure we both could have said it earlier. My (now) DH hinted at it for weeks before he said it. He said it first. I waited for him because it was the second time we’d been in a relationship and he’d hurt me the first time around. He never said it during that first relationship.

I think if you feel it, just say it!

Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 08/08/2020 10:12

Ok I may have to just say it and let it come out

OP posts:
funnylittlefloozie · 08/08/2020 11:21

It was 3.5 months for us before either of us actually said it... but i was pretty sure after a couple of months. Then he did something absolutely perfect three months in, and i KNEW right then that i loved the bones of him, and told him so.

Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 08/08/2020 13:41

Ok most people have said it 3 months in maybe I should wait

OP posts:
Fressia123 · 08/08/2020 13:52

I think it was a week - 10 days for us. He said it over text (but he explained that he hoped I didn't think he was crazy). I still have that screenshot :)

LemonDrizzle44 · 08/08/2020 15:26

It was 2 months with me and DP. We were similar to you in that it just felt right from the start. He then worked away for a couple of weeks and we just kept in touch on the phone. When he came back he said it felt like half of him was missing while he was away and I felt the same so he then dropped the L word!
We've been together nearly 3 years now, have bought our first home together and now trying to start a little family. If it feels right go for it!!!

hotblacktea · 08/08/2020 15:40

If you feel it, say it, life is too short to play waiting games or find the perfect timing or occasion for this.

joystir59 · 08/08/2020 15:58

Just say it.

Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 08/08/2020 23:11

Thanks for the advice

OP posts:
Gooseygoosey12345 · 08/08/2020 23:38

I think we were between one to two weeks! We've been together/married quite some time now though and the spark is still there so I don't think there's a timescale you can put on it, when it's right, it's right

DemDem94 · 09/08/2020 01:12

I’d just say if you feel it. Maybe if your in doubt about saying it maybe instead of saying I love you, maybe you could tell him I think I’m falling in love with you, and see what he says.
Maybe his just as nervous as you are about saying and thinking it’s to soon, I bet his dying to say it back.
Good luck and please keep us all updated with this, it’s very exciting.
I’m one that believes in love at first sight and soppy stuff like true love ect lol

Original poster
Littlebeachhut · 09/08/2020 01:19

We’ve both said we can see ourselves falling in love with each other he asked me to be exclusive pretty much instantly he spoke about him being my boyfriend today think I’m going to ask him tomorrow at the top of the hill on our dog walk seeing as he asked us to be exclusive

OP posts:
BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 09/08/2020 01:25

I don’t think you can love someone so soon. I think you have to see them over a longer period to see how they are in different situations. Most relationships would be good after such a short time. I hope it all works out for you but don’t rush it would be my advice to anyone.

WinterAndRoughWeather · 09/08/2020 13:06

@BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze

Of course you can love someone that soon. The rest of your post is good advice if you’re thinking of moving in with someone or marrying them, but Jesus it’s a bit overkill for the falling in love bit, which often happens quickly and easily.

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 09/08/2020 13:15

Of course you can love someone that soon. The rest of your post is good advice if you’re thinking of moving in with someone or marrying them, but Jesus it’s a bit overkill for the falling in love bit, which often happens quickly and easily.

You have your opinion, I have mine. You can not know someone very well after a month or two. It’s just not possible. You don’t know how they react to certain things, you don’t know that much about them at all and can’t love someone without knowing them well.

WinterAndRoughWeather · 09/08/2020 15:23

Love is a chemical bonding thing, it happens quickly and overwhelmingly. You’re talking about long term compatibility, which is a whole different kettle of fish. I’ve loved many men, but been properly compatible with maybe two, three?

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 09/08/2020 15:36

You’re talking about long term compatibility,

No I’m not. Stop stating your opinion as if it’s fact.