Friends not replying to messages during lockdown

[BoomShacks]

Anyone else finding that friends aren't replying to messages during lockdown?

I have about 8 friends who I usually keep in regular contact with and have been trying to check in with them, but I'm not hearing back from most of them. Especially the last month or two.

Are people just totally fed up of lockdown and can't be arsed to speak to anyone anymore? I miss my friends!

I've got a similar situation but with work colleagues.
Before I went into isolation everyone used to chat with me and act like they were my friends.
Three weeks into lockdown, we chatted in our WhatsApp group. As the weeks went on, people stopped replying to me and only responding about work.
I won't be going out of my way for anyone when I go back.

Not just you. Same here. Now they are back at work- they are wondering why I don’t reply to their messages ......hmmm fair weather friends!!
(They were furloughed, I wasn’t, but different employment)

I spend all day on my screen for work.
When I’m not working I’ve been looki. After my children or stopping the house descending into squalor.
Until my youngest went back to nursery, I spent most evenings working to catch up time I’d spent with them during the day. Now I only do it twice a week.
My work has never been busier.
I’m desperately trying to do some form of exercise in the seconds I have to myself.
One of my closest friends has been bereaved and I’ve spoken to her a lot (I don’t begrudge that at all, but there are only so many hours of the day)
I either lie or cry about how shit it is if anyone asks me how it is going.

Your friends could be me, and I’m sorry if so.

I'm guilty of this all the time not just Covid but thankfully people know that's just me. I don't always have my phone to hand and it can be a while before I reply but I don't do it on purpose.
How often do you text? Tbh if I was getting many messages just saying hi or what are you up to when it's just work and lockdown type lifestyle is find that exhausting.
God, I sound horrible don't I? Honestly I'm not.

Where are you locked down?

Well I mean not everything is totally back to normal yet

The only thing I would say to everyone is that you don't truly know what's going on with another person, they could have so many reasons for not being in touch , from struggling with their mental health to being overwhelmed with work and responsibilities. I would say that we should all try to give more leeway than we normally would, a little more patience than these situations normally merit. It could make all the difference so some people and it could benefit you too.

Obviously we all have our limits and boundaries and should respect them too. Just extend them a little bit if you feel like you can.

Everyone's personal situation is different, relationships and friendships are different. There isn't a one size fits all solution.

If I lose friendships because I'm struggling then so be it, maybe they weren't friendships meant to last. Just don't burn bridges unless you have to. That's my advice. Obviously you can take it with a pinch of salt.

I'd err on the forgiving side here.

I'm a single parent, self-employed and have also had other stuff going on in the past few months. I haven't been brilliant at messaging, but I suppose that I have at least sent a couple of messages to everyone that's important to me in the past couple of months.

However, if someone's message arrives while I'm rushed off my feet I am definitely guilty of leaving it and forgetting about it.

Luckily my friends are pretty much all the same. We're as bad as each other and everyone seems fairly relaxed about it but then we're all in similar boats as the vast majority of my friends are self-employed and have been working all through this, or they work for the NHS so have also been extremely busy. Kids suddenly at home a lot more as they can't go to Granny's house for the day etc.

Even for those people whose lives haven't been under more pressure, those on furlough have the long empty days to deal with which is NOT easy. I imagine a lot of people whose MH was previously fine and dandy could well be low-level depressed right now.