separating and buying out

[littlerainbigheart]

Hi everyone,

i'm going through a horrible time at the moment, but i'll cut to the chase. I am separating from my husband and we have decided that I will try to buy his half of the house and he move out. he just wants his fair share so I'm hoping it won't be too difficult. Problem is no one can tell me what I need to do first, do I talk to a solicitor first, my bank, an independent mortgage advisor? I have no clue. He wont leave until I can offer him his financials and it is being all left up to me to navigate.

Anyone who has been in similar positions can you please help with advice? I literally don't know who to call first.

I am in the same position. My partner has left and will pay his half of mortgage until I can afford to take it over. I will be returning to work full time and then get the necessary 3-4 months worth of statements to ensure I can pass the affordability criteria and presumably I would then take out a new mortgage in my sole name. I will talk to my mortgage provider as I will need to break the fixed term and j want to see how much I will be charged for that. Sorry but much help as all very recent so I will watch the other responses to this with interest

Hello,
Me ex bought me out of my old home with him. He contacted a mortgage broker first to see if he could afford/get a mortgage on the property, based on the houses valuation. He then had a solicitor act on his behalf and bought me our, all I had to do was give bank details and sign my side over

@Lacey2019 thank you. Do you know was the house valued or was it based on current house value estimates? I'm trying to navigate this as quickly as possible as the situation is becoming toxic and he wont leave until I have a financial offering for him. I can't leave either.

I bought my ex h out of our house some years ago and the process went something like this got current valuations from a few different agents and worked out the average valuation. Got a mortgage redemption figure from current lender and used the difference between the 2 as guidance for my offer. Spoke to current lender about affordability and increased borrowing which they agreed to. Made offer to ex h which he excepted and we started ball rolling on mortgage application and transfer of equity deed with conveyancing solicitor. Simultaneously I also did our divorce ourselves as it was a fairly straightforward one as we didn't have any other assets or savings and we were quite amicable. Everything was done and dusted within a few months.

We had it valued when we split. It was worth what we’d paid due to brexit etc. X

Are you totally sure buying him out is the right thing to do split wise?

I bought ExDP out (no marriage which is why I ask). I got three house valuations and offered the middle of that. I suspect the selling price would have less given Brexit (and you would have to be v careful now given the situation). Watch out for the stamp duty, and your mortgage payment will quadruple overnight. Okay last year, much less so now! ( I don’t go out much!).

Sorry I didn’t answer your question either... I spoke to the mortgage advisor to see what I could afford first. It then turned out my existing provider was best but (weirdly) they wouldn’t go through the broker so I had to do it but it wasn’t really that bad. I would deffo speak to a solicitor first though because they might have a totally different view on whether you should do it (don’t ask a conveyancing one).

I’m buying my husband out but unclear about the stamp duty issue. Please can someone explain how I avoid paying it again!? Property is worth £900k so not exempt under the new SDLT threaholds. Do we have to divorce BEFORE the remortgage goes through? Thanks

I’d start with a solicitor.

I believe my ex had to pay it on my part. Although he’s a serial liar, so this probably is too

From gov.uk "You don’t pay SDLT if you transfer an interest in land or property to your partner as part of an agreement or court order because you’re either:

divorcing
dissolving a civil partnership"

I'm investigating my options too but the only way our current bank would consider it is if I can prove I can pay the mortgage for three months without any support - which I can do - just.

The problem is that I can't afford to give 'D'H any of his equity with that option and I don't think he would agree to leave anyway as there is very little on the market here at the moment so our bog standard house currently looks like a good investment. I am exploring all the options open to me before I pitch my preferred plan to 'D'H.

I did affordability calculator on my bank's website and rang them in case they could offer me more over the phone - my ideal was to remortgage to raise the equity for 'D' H but that was declined and the only option to stay is to prove I can pay the mortgage for a period of time with no help.

But as I want to split, there is no reason to expect DH to agree to move out.

I've had an appointment with the bank, to check that they'll give me the mortgage in my own name. They will, phew

I've had 3 valuations done on the house. I'm seeing a solicitor next. My parents have offered to give me the money to buy him out, but I'm not sure if it will be enough. If he wants 50/50 it won't be

What will you do if he won't accept 50/50, @ImFree2doasiwant?

Has he agreed you can stay if you can afford to buy him out. Are you still living together?

I bought my ex husband out about 3 years ago and it took about 5 month and he lived in the spare room until he got his equity 🤦🏼‍♀️
Firstly I got some legal advice from a solicitor regarding a legal separation/divorce-lots of firms give a free 30 min initial consultation.
The next thing I did was have a consultation with the mortgage provider we were with to look at affordability etc. We had the house valued by 3 local agents but the banks valuation came in almost £10,000 under those valuations so I pushed through my solicitor to use the banks valuation as realistically I don’t think the house would have achieved what the estate agents said it would and it was £5000 less equity to find! Initially the bank were not going to agree the mortgage on affordability so sold my car (which was on Finance) and got a banger and this brought me just into affordability! A few other hitches along the way but got there in the end!!
For me it was really important I stayed where I was (close friends live on the same street, small commute to work etc) so it was worth the process, good luck!

@Fantasisa if he wants 50/50 I don't think I can do it, I'm not sure my parents can/will stump up that much. Yes he has agreed to me buying me out but we have not agreed on a price.

He hasn't lived here for a couple of years. I do, with the small children.

@ImFree2doasiwant I hope he agrees. Fingers crossed for you!

You need to see a solicitor first. 50:50 may not be fair If one one you has taken maternity or family leave or works part time to care for children or will have The children living with them more than half the time.

@HilaryXYZ

House transfers in divorce are indeed exempt from stamp duty. I have recently done it. When my transfer happened (was filed) it was after I had decree nisi, and consent order was agreed and filed with the court. I don’t know if this is a legal requirement, or just the way it went.
So - the original mortgage repayment and transfer of the property all happened at the same time.
You need to get advice on the exact steps and timing.
But main thing - no stamp duty in divorce, on the primary residence transfers.

When I did this we took off the cost of selling it from the agreed price as it showed he was saving half of the nominal £5k fees so brought his share down by £2.5k, that together with realising he would have to stump up early redemption fees helped swing the split to a more favourable offer for me and he still got more than if a sale had Been forced. Use these figures to help argue your case for a transfer rather than sale, can be a substantial difference.

@ALLIS0N I have had 2 sets of maternity leave, now work part time, and have forgone promotions due to this. I have the children full time atm, he has them for the day one day of the weekend (Not overnight) although I'd be happy for more. I'm hoping this will go in my favour.

What he doesn't seem to understand is that it is not about screwing him over, it's because I dont have the money to do 50/50. If I did, id gladly hand it over.

My sister is going through something very similar, she has two school aged children, could she pay him an affordable lump sum amount, stay in the house till the youngest is 18 then pay the rest ? I know this used to be an option not sure nowadays.

My ex bought me out, this is what we did

Got the house valued by 3 estate agents, took middle value + £7000 (he wanted everything in the house)

He saw the mortgage adviser to see if he could afford the extra mortgage

He sorted it out and I have to take a piece of paper for the solicitors to confirm the change of name (cost £50)

That was it

[quote ImFree2doasiwant]@ALLIS0N I have had 2 sets of maternity leave, now work part time, and have forgone promotions due to this. I have the children full time atm, he has them for the day one day of the weekend (Not overnight) although I'd be happy for more. I'm hoping this will go in my favour.

What he doesn't seem to understand is that it is not about screwing him over, it's because I dont have the money to do 50/50. If I did, id gladly hand it over.[/quote]
You need legal advice ASAP. 50:50 is probably not fair in your situation. Especially as the children will live with you all the time.

Please see a lawyer and don’t try to negotiate this yourself. Otherwise you and your kids will regret it later.

@ALLIS0N thank you. I've been holding out hope that he will be reasonable about it but he seems incredibly bitter and not quite of rational mind at the moment.