Explicit pics

[Sunflower960]

I need someone to talk to 😢

I have just found naked pictures and videos on my husbands phone, from 3 different women!

We have been married less than a year and are trying to concieve our first baby.
My head is a mess, I cant sleep, I dont know what to do.

So pleased you have had the strength to throw him out, now you need to hang onto your anger to ensure he doesn't EVER come back.

It will be hard to do, but as every other poster has told you, cheaters DON'T ever change, they just get more secretive

You will NEVER be able to trust him fully, and you cannot turn back time to when you were 'happy' (which was actually just when YOU were happy, HE was actively seeking women to screw ! )

The lump in your chest will never leave, and you will always be living in fear and anxiety if you allow him back

Tell all friends and family the TRUTH about why you've ended your brief marriage, and do not minimise it or cover it up out of embarrassment ! YOU have NOTHING to be ashamed of, HE DOES, and should be made to face the consequences of HIS actions

I'd definitely NOT be having a child with such a cretin as you'll be dooming both yourself and your DC to contact with him for the next 20 odd years !! It's much easier to move on when you don't have to be reminded by having to be in contact with the cause of so much misery

Exactly what @updownroundandround has said above!! I can't say more than that. Good luck OP, you will survive this and you'll be so much happier when you find what you deserve

Obviously cheating is inexcusable no matter what the circumstance but sometimes it can be more of an "accident"
For example, genuinely developing feelings for someone you are around often (e.g at work) or a one off "drunken" mistake where temptation was too much.

BUT what your husband has done (and is doing) is ACTIVELY searching for women to cheat with! And not just one but multiple women!

This sort of man has it in his blood IMO and this says a lot about his personality in general. He is not a nice person.

He sounds vile and you deserve better.
If suitable for you maybe get a semi permanent contraceptive while you are still vulnerable to taking him back as you are in shock.
Do not shackle yourself to this excuse of a man, you deserve a child within a loving relationship.
My exh did not stop doing this, but it started in his 20's. By the time he was a sad bald lothario in his 40's he had to pay for it in brothels. These men never ever stop. They seek out a nice woman as a respectable front and treat the wife adoringly as to not raise suspicion.
My family was in shock when I told them about my exh, and was even encouraged to take him back.
I did and massively regret it. Luckily like you there were no children involved so now is your chance.
Fast forward 10 years with a couple of kids and he is still playing about, what would you say to that woman?
Get out run get support but this will be harder if you let it continue.
I am also disgusted he risked your sexual health ( while trying to conceive) and physical health during a pandemic, what a selfish man.
I am so sorry you are going through this. But in a year you will be fine.

I hope you’re doing ok Sunflower960

There’s some great advice on this thread. Well done for asking him to leave and I think you handled it really well by going out.

Stay strong x

How are you op?

I'm not doing great. I cant lie.
I logged into his account from my phone today and found some more messages to another girl today. So disrespectful towards me.

All our families know now and although I feel ashamed of the situation (I know iv done nothing) at least I have support around me.
I will be fine im sure, its just a shit situation that I have to deal with.
Thanks everyone for your advice and messages xxx

Well done, you are strong. He will 100% think he can talk you round by lying and minimising. I couldn't understand why my xh went to the trouble of marrying me when he enjoyed going on hook up sites, but it's because they want the family man mask. The married man act and all the advantages that comes with that for men. Because otherwise they look sad. And mine was in his 40s and still trying to swap photos with younger women. They don't change and grow up. Stay strong and do not take him back. Look up sunken costs fallacy

Well done, op.
Keep being strong. There will be times as the shock subsides that you have a wobble... please dont, read all the stories from myself and others- they never change and its so much worse down the line with children etc.
Have control and be in control of your destiny. Keep us up to date, wont you op? And good luck!

You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. I felt the same shame and embarrassment and it took me a long time to realise that it was him who should feel like this and not me. There was nothing anyone could say to help, it just hit me one day. I don't think to this day he's told his family what really happened, they all think I'm crazy and left him in the lurch!

Stay strong OP, you're worth so much more than this and now is the best time to walk away. Use your support network, those people love you and will want what's best for you

Oh how horrible for you. What a wan*er. You're only 29. Loads of time for children. I'm glad you have support. Try not to keep looking at his account as it will o PT hurt you more xx

After 10 months of ttc, I just know its gunna be this month after everything that has happened.
My cycles are a mess and my O day was CD10 this month - 6 days ago. Which has never happened so early.
Now I cant stop worrying about this!

Oh bless you. Try not to worry, whatever will he will be in that situation!

Hope you're feeling ok

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Others are right though, you are so young and have your whole life ahead of you. That probably sounds really patronising and I'm sorry. But you do have many more years to have children with someone who doesn't treat you this way.

Are you worried you might be pregnant now too? Obviously it's totally up to you, but I wouldn't let this influence your decision about him. I'd try not to worry (easier said than done I know) until you know for sure - when is the earliest you can test? (Been a few years since I was TTC so I can't remember!). Thinking of you

Divorce and start a new life. Just be glad you found out before having his child.
You're 29. Plenty time to find a lovely new man and have an honest relationship with children. You've got a decade. You'll be just fine xxx

Don't waste the next decade of your life trying to save this and having a baby with him. You will only find yourself in this exact situation again down the line.

Take your life back now. Don't wait x

Hopefully you are not pregnant, bit even if you were you have a choice.

And if you choose not to proceed (which would be completely understandable) absolutely no-one need know other than you and any trusted, reliable confidante you choose.

He has zero rights to know or have any say.

So glad you told the families too, exactly the right thing to do so he can't lie and bullshit (though I'm sure he's still trying).