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Original poster

How to proceed.

44 replies

C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 20:57

On Sunday night we watched a DVD. A DVD we had watched 1000s times before.
We went from happily watching to Defcon5 because I fast forwarded a 5 minute sex scene. Seen 1000s before.

Unbelievable rage accusing me of censoring what he watches. Accused of being a dried up woman.

We have not spoken since Sunday. Tonight we tried to have a conversation. I have to apologise for fast forwarding the sex scene.

OP posts:
Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 20:59

From 0 to Atomic in 5 seconds.

OP posts:
Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:04

Tonight:
But why did you do something that you know would wind me up. I want an apology from you for making me so upset. Why would do do that?

OP posts:
LuluBellaBlue · 23/07/2020 21:06

I guess why did you fast forward it? If children present and it wasn’t suitable for them then I’d understand but if I was watching a movie with someone and they randomly fast forwarded it I’d stop and ask them why and to rewind it!

However I also don’t agree with shouting or sulking. I’d try to discuss each of your perspectives and points of view

hopingtobedally · 23/07/2020 21:07

Interested to know why you fast forwarded it

category12 · 23/07/2020 21:07

Try reading Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft. www.docdroid.net/py03/why-does-he-do-that-pdf

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:10

I made the mistake of saying it.

It’s a filler sex scene which adds nothing to narrative of the film. I can’t describe the rage.

OP posts:
hopingtobedally · 23/07/2020 21:11

But it's part of the film?
Need a bit more back story- do you have sexual/ jealousy issues?

LuluBellaBlue · 23/07/2020 21:15

I made the mistake of saying it.

Saying what?

It’s a filler sex scene which adds nothing to narrative of the film.

That’s your perspective. Clearly not the director / producers and perhaps not your partners.

To be honest if someone did that to me I’d find them incredibly rude and would 100% lose respect for my partner if he decided a part of a movie wasn’t worth watching and fast forwarded it!

Why did you do it really?
Was it to wind him up or because the sec scene makes you feel uncomfortable?

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:16

It’s the scene in ‘Officer and a Gentleman’ in the motel room. Shock! We have children older than that film. We’ve all watched the film.

OP posts:
LuluBellaBlue · 23/07/2020 21:18

You’re not answering the questions as to why you fast forwarded it?

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:18

We’ve watched it for about 30 years. That is my point.

OP posts:
LuluBellaBlue · 23/07/2020 21:24

So what’s the point in watching any of the film then as you might as well fast forward all of it Confused

To be honest it doesn’t sound like either of you treat the other nicely or with respect. This incident is 100% on you. Yes he may of shouted, but if this is your normal behaviour and treatment maybe he was exasperated. Obviously it’s hard to say when only this one incident but I too would be seriously peeved off with you and would think you’re incredibly rude and selfish.

edwinbear · 23/07/2020 21:24

I think that’s really odd to fast forward a sex scene when you were watching with your DP. We’re you embarrassed? Did you fast forward other parts you felt were boring or just the sex scene? Confused

itsureis · 23/07/2020 21:30

Why would anyone fast forward a sex scene with a young Richard Gere 🤔

category12 · 23/07/2020 21:32

Don't some of you posters think it's rather odd to focus on "the offence" of fast-forwarding the film, rather than the rage outburst and silent treatment for 4 days afterwards?! Jesus.

category12 · 23/07/2020 21:35

OP, do you spend a lot of your time avoiding "setting him off"?

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:36

I hear you but you’re not hearing the noise and the rage. I stopped fast forwarding and offered to rewind. Proper flecks at the mouth and I have to apologise because I made him so angry.

OP posts:
Clumsyduck · 23/07/2020 21:37

His reaction is ridiculous does he normally sulk like that .

Why did you fast forward it tho ??

I have to be honest I find sex scenes in films awkward when watching with anyone ! Even With a partner , I don’t know why ?! It’s not a jealousy thing and I’m the last person anyone would call a prude 😂 so if it’s that I kind of get it but I still think his reaction is over the top!

category12 · 23/07/2020 21:38

Of course it's fucking over the top. Hmm

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:40

Cat12. He said why did I try to wind him up when I knew it would annoy him. I fast forwarded a film and stopped on command!

OP posts:
Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:41

He said I FF because I am a dried out old woman and not to censor his films.

OP posts:
Clumsyduck · 23/07/2020 21:44

Well calling you that is far more disrespectful than fast forwarding a film he sounds a dick

Original poster
C0rdelia · 23/07/2020 21:44

I can’t describe the

Happy watching TV - —— Indescribable rage.

OP posts:
category12 · 23/07/2020 21:46

Has your relationship always been like this, or is this new behaviour from him?

pictish · 23/07/2020 21:46

Um...yeah. It sounds like a complete overreaction to me.

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