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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

He wants to leave me

57 replies

Saddsunshine · 05/07/2020 20:35

Hi there. I don't know where to turn. I don't know what to do.
I didn't see this coming, husband of 3 years (together for 16) has announced today he wants a divorce.
We have two beautiful children 12 & 6.
We have a beautiful home although it's rented.
No red flags, no warning
Up until last week there was still intimacy, then it all just suddenly stopped. I look after my body, I always make an effort with my appearance. But it just stopped.

Today I questioned it, and I'm kinda sorry I did now. Because all hell was unleashed. And I didn't see it coming.
I don't know what to do or think

OP posts:

WhatASadLittleLifeJane · 07/07/2020 08:14

Have you asked him if there is another woman OP?

Psychoseverywhere · 07/07/2020 08:20

What a prick. So sorry you are going through this. Firstly find out if you have an entitlement to benefits and then pack his bag. If he wants out then show him the door and make sure he does not push you out of it first.

Original poster

Saddsunshine · 07/07/2020 09:38

He's told me there isn't anybody else,hes not doing this for anybody else but himself. I am not getting any answers to how long he's felt this way. I don't know how to feel today. Not sure if it's more sadness confusion or Anger building up

OP posts:

ButtonHogger · 07/07/2020 09:44

You'll obviously go through all of those feelings mixed together, I feel it's so strange the way I can love him so much but hate his guts at the same time for what he has done. I started writing a diary, would that help maybe? I didn't do it every day, just when I couldn't make sense of my thoughts and they were all over the place

Dashel · 07/07/2020 10:16

I’m so sorry OP.

Whatever happens and for arguments sake, he apologises, you get counselling and make it work, you are never going to fully trust him ever again.

Even in this situation I would open a bank account, get legal advice and get a job. You cannot trust him any longer to fully have your back. So please protect yourself.

tenbob · 08/07/2020 15:00

@Saddsunshine

They all say that, I’m afraid. It doesn’t mean it’s true though, and the work mate/friend they move in with months later was someone they definitely definitely didn’t start a relationship with until after you split, honest gov

ButtonHogger · 09/07/2020 21:24

How are you feeling OP?

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