Famous last words

[BrambleJam978]

Just a light hearted thread on the last thing ( or most memorable) that an ex said to you during the break up that makes you think back and appreciate they aren't in your life any more .

Mine was with an ex that cheated on me... We split up but he contacted me a couple of years later . I said there was no point trying again as I didn't trust him because of the cheating.

He said "I really let myself down , I spent a lifetime creating my good reputation and I blew it all in a few months of being myself".

I thought that response was hilarious, It still makes me laugh and I am so glad that we are over. I never replied, I wanted that to be the last thing he ever said to me. And to this day it is.

Does anyone else have any famous last words?

Mine sat me down and said there were five things wrong with me....1 I carried too much weight, 2 I smoked and couldn’t hear the rest as I was laughing too much.

He can fuck right off.

One of my best moments was when I walked into his office and chucked his vagina sex toy at him from the door way. Me and my mum still laugh at that

One of my ex boyfriends was pissed off that I was (gently) trying to cool things between us, by phone, and got angry that I wasn't doing what he wanted and told me that I couldn't treat him like a dog, I'm afraid I rather childishly woofed at him and put the phone down on him. Didn't miss him one bit.

@BrambleJam978 LOL that's classic! I don't really have one of my own, but had to say that was really funny lol

The only one I can remember is my very first boyfriend. We were 15, we’d probably been going out a couple of months or so but I’d decided he wasn’t for me.

I took our mutual friend aside when we were all hanging out together one night - was the countryside so we were probably smoking hash in a field or a playground, there was nothing else to do.

I quietly asked his friend how I could let my boyfriend down gently, and the friend promptly yelled gleefully across the playground or whatever, “Gav you is DUMPED!”.

To his credit Gav just responded, “cool” and pretended to be totally cool. I was mortified for him, but also thought it was pretty funny.

Screamed at me that he demanded respect and stormed out.
I left and never returned. He got a divorce.

I love the opening post so much. Thing is, I know exactly what he means. That's what makes it so funny.

Told me I’d broken his heart and he’d never trust another woman ever again. He was engaged within 6 months and married inside a year.
There was another one who told me I’d never find another man like him - er yes, I’m quite happy about that too!

I cant quite remember. But i do remember when i realised he was an ass. He was messaging a friend and and left his phone on the table with screen showing to get a quick drink. I noticed a pic of me so i scrolled out of curiosity. His friend proudly sent him a photo of his new GF so my ex sent one back of me, underneath it said something like, shes not really my type but shes nice to me, as though he had to justify my looks. Him and his mates go for the caked on bimbo look. Im a tomboy and enjoy having a laugh but i certainly scrub up well and made an effort while together.

6 years on and even though hes married he will every so often message me. Do i reply...fuck no...silence is golden...i owe you no explanation whatsoever.

My ExH told me he would see me dead before he let me be happy with anyone else. Those were the last words he said to me as he closed the door on 4th July 2014 and moved in with his mum. Left me with 3DCs under 10, said he didnt want me, but he would make sure no one else wanted me either.....

Anyway 6 years later, he still lives with his mummy and sleeps in her attic, meanwhile I have a beautiful 4 bed detached for me, DP, who should now be DH, but Covid got in the way, and 3 DCs who all adore DP.

And every other week when he comes to pick the two youngest up, I smile to myself as we must be the picture of happiness to him, and I know it chokes him every time.

Love the first post, I have to admit to spending my whole married life working on my reputation.

@Sugartitss

There was five things wrong with you?

I am so glad he only got to number 2 befir you stopped listening ...., that is brilliant... And the vagina sex toy?!? I live a sheltered life it seems, I bet he still gets the piss taken out of him for that.

@NoMoreDickheads

It's just got so many layers for me , I thought it was brilliant... And I only thought he cheated for a couple of weeks ( that was the original story) bumping it up to a few months was classic stupid, LOL.

@WinterAndRoughWeather

Did that become a catchphrase.... I would have been so tempted to turn that into a cathchhrase .... It's brilliant . I can see that scene so clear in my head. Poor Gav though, but he took it well.

Gav...You is DUMPED!

@TheFoz

Doesn't sound much like he deserved respect.... What a tosser. That sounds aggressive actually. I'm sorry.

@0v9c99f9g9d939d9f9g9h8h

I know , that message was a gift because I still had feelings for him but that shook them out of me faster than I could have imagined.

@Sunbird24

Oh... So he's learned a few tricks about emotional manipulation.... Who can say that with a straight face, because you broke up with them? I've never had anyone say I'd never find anyone else like them... And I've went out with a few arrogant men. You dodged a bullet in both cases me thinks.

@Unagi1

What a fucking arsehole, oh , I know the type. They don't actually just you on looks , more on effort. If you were naturally beautiful with no make up on you would still get nil points.... I'm the same , I have to have a gun to my head to pile on the make up and I'd take a pair of flats over heels any day.

You know that saying "there are no ugly woman , just lazy ones"... It makes me cringe because I'm definitely lazy ....I don't care enough though.

@Icanflyhigh

He would see you dead... God , I don't usually advocate showing off your up levelling in life. But I'm pretty glad that arsehole gets to witness your "perfect" life every single time he gets his kids.... It must really get to him. Good for you and congratulations !!!! Covid-19 has ruined a lot, but you will get your day with your lovely husband to be...

@oralengineer

And I bet you do it at the same time as actually "being yourself". I bet you didn't even know that those two things don't necessarily go together. It was news to me too... It still makes me laugh.

"While you're living in my house you'll do as you're told." Moved out that very evening.
This was not just some random boyfriend but an actual husband. I took one suitcase and a huge sense of relief with me.

When my now exh got served his divorce papers a week after he'd moved out to live with OW he phoned me with this little gem.

" So you don't think this marriage is worth fighting for then? I'd come back if you did!"

My how I laughed.

I wish we had broken up after this conversation, but I was an idiot and I didn't. I was shattered on a Sunday evening after a weekend together and made it clear to my (snoring, greedy, very labour intensive) boyfriend that he was not invited to stay at my place as I wanted to try to be fresh for work on Monday. He went home and was furious with me. The next day he gave me a proper telling off about him having to get two tubes home late-ish on a Sunday, and said - he actually said these exact words! - "Foremost in your mind should be my convenience."

Oh this is a great thread. After I gave my ex DP his marching orders, he said...

"Maybe you're just too strict and uptight".

This was after years of watching him drink-drive, waste all our money on impulsive trips abroad (by himself!), leave me at home 2 days post partum to go and supply weed to friends and meet his pals for a lads lunch, telling me repeatedly to "fuck off" when I would ask him to take the baby of an evening if I was exhausted (he only saw his kids for one hour in the evening due to work). The list goes on. And on.

Very very glad to be getting rid. I will happily live out the rest of my uptight days not breaking any laws and not disrespecting my family. He, on the other hand, who knows (or cares!).

" I don't know why I'm so gutted, you aren't even that good looking"
😂

I've posted on mumsnet about this before but at uni I had a would be rock star boyfriend. Quite nice but a massive man child. Left uni, went on the dole, living back with parents, wouldn't consider getting a job as he needed to practice his guitar and singing "full time".

His parting shot when I told him I'd met a proper grown up someone else was: "When I'm famous you'll see me on tv and wish you were still with me." Needless to say, he isn't and I don't.

I had someone break up with me over the phone, which I graciously accepted. He then called back to complain that I hadn't called back. His words: "You were supposed to run after me."

When I was 18 i had a 25 year old boyfriend who went to Australia for a few months and when he left he said he didn't think it would work as he didn't know when he's be coming back and I was going to uni

He was back 6 weeks later , he phoned me on Christmas day and when I politely told him I didn't want to see him he said 'what, you're blowing me out like a candle '
I replied ' no that was you when you clearly dumped me so you could go shagging on holiday'

He came round to mine on a Saturday morning and told me he was dumping me for another woman. As he stood up to go, he said "how about one for the road?"

And he didn't mean a drink. Needless to say it didn't happen.

Many, many years ago, during that fleeting time when we all look fucking gorgeous, I had a real model for a boyfriend.

I had waist length, curly red hair, hour glass figure, slightly top heavy and was still competing in track and field athletics, so I know I looked good for about 2 years, max!

He was gorgeous. Utterly, utterly gorgeous. Very 80s, androgenous, but well built, blonde, blue eyed and did I say utterly gorgeous?

And so into himself Carly Simon really did write a song about him.

He never knowingly passed a mirror without stopping, checking and blowing himself a kiss. I had a mirror in the hallway.

After about 6 months he became so very boring. One day, as we were going out, I lost my mind. He stopped at the mirror... I took it off the wall, gave it to him, pushed him out and locked the door on him!

Old friends who find me on Facebook check it's me with that story

I promise I used paragraphs!!!

Curious that is hilarious

When I was about 25 a boyfriend said to me 'Your body overall is not bad, but you could do with losing the wobble off your thighs"

We then went on a lunch date and he said "I don't think either of us need a pudding!"

To be honest, both of them were last words as I realised we weren't destined to be together, but I did fancy some lunch before I left!

Can I say the last words I said??
Bit tmi warning...
My very uptight Catholic now exh was very restricted sex wise. For example he hadn't seen a woman's genitals until I was actually giving birth... Wouldn't 'allow' me to 'finish' during /after sex... Denied every masturbating himself - like ever..
Just before I moved out I was sleeping in the conservatory - he had our room - went up to get some clothes etc and caught him wanking into a pair of my pj's... Stood unnoticed until the relevant time
. Asked him very loudly "had he quite finished yet" ??
Disgusting git - had to bin my good pj's!!