Dangerous ex husband has made contact - advice please

[Varenne]

I'm hoping that someone can help me and give me advice, I don't even know where to start looking for help. My ex husband was very abusive (physical, sexual, emotional). He was arrested and convicted of assault in 2016 after I finally got the courage to phone the police. A restraining order was put in place and when that expired last year I didn't try to renew it as I had moved to a new city and didn't want him to know where I was.

He has now sent a message through social media to me saying he wants his belongings and calling me a thief and a criminal. I am physically shaking and terrified. I knew he wouldn't move on, he will see me as his enemy and he knows where my mum lives. She has a case of his old clothes but after all this time is she obliged to hand them over? I don't want anyone to see him, he is dangerous. I was going to phone her local police force to see if they could take the items.

Aside from the practical stuff, why is he now in touch? He also started following my mother on social media last week but she didn't tell me as didn't want to upset me. I'm so scared and I don't know what to do

My ex too thousands off me over £4000 as a single mum I couldnt afford to lose it but I had to pay it off my mom said to my sister it's a shame they split up he loved her so very much my sister said the blokes a flipping parasite my sisters had to take your grandsons dla money to repay a debt he landed her with i hope he falls into a deep hole and never shows up again

So my moms the type to promote unsuitable men in my life

Did your mom believe you? Or?

Give his stuff back, because then he doesn,t have one over you and it,s one less thing to stop you moving forward.

He's not after his stuff. He's after attention. The second he gets what the OP has, he'll be back asking 'for the rest'.

It'll not end.

He will then insist something is missing. And because she has engaged that'll be her drawn in again.

You dont get anywhere by being nice or trying to reach a compromise with his kind. He will see that as weakness. And attack all the harder.

Hi Vareene, well done for leaving him. He must have been dumped again after all where has he been for 3 years.
Get the restraint order and block him. He’s really not interested in his clothes.
I understand the fear. Have you done the freedom course via women’s aid.
Bloody bastard.🌺

My ex husband pops up every 20 years or so still trying to get inside of my defences. He full on stalked me for the first 5 years after I divorced him, (no non mol orders back then) then randomly since, with major efforts on his part( think getting jobs in the same building, flat in same block, even when I changed career and city, no idea how he found out despite my moving jobs and cities, no social media back then)
We've been divorced more than 40 years and he still tries this shit.
It frightens me, his spite and obsession, but I try not to let it get to me.
Thank fuck we had no shared children.

Sorry, forgot to say every single contact, i reported to police and recorded it.
And did not engage with him at all.