Are soulmates real?

[MummyGoingItAlone]

Just that. And if they are, how do you know if you’ve found them?

Just a sunny day musing 😊

No they are not real

You can have great bonds and connections with people. But I don’t believe in souls so I can’t believe in soulmates. I have some platonic friends who I adore and am so happy I have them but things do change. I just enjoy what I have when I have it. The problem with believing in soulmates is that it is devastating when the ‘soulmate’ hurts you - as if you are somehow immune from this due to the label you have given to them.

Clearly, we can all have our own opinions on this topic but I personally don't think they are real, no. I agree that it just elevates the person who you give that label to a platform that they will no doubt fall from. I believe that we do meet each other for a reason but not for that reason.

My husband believes I'm his soulmate. I don't think I'm his!
We get on great, don't want to be married to anyone else. But soulmate......
I think there's lots of people for us throughout the world and our life.
But maybe I'm wrong?

No.

Edited to add
I mean, I don't believe he is my soulmate.

No. If the very definition implies a once in a life time exclusive connection, then how come you just happen to meet them in everyday full life ...probably in your work or bar or whatever . Of course not

No they don't exist

You're only with a person because you met them before someone else.

Even those who say they're made for each other, get each other, etc that's just down to luck and timing.

The OED defines a soulmate as "A person who shares a deep understanding or bond with another; esp. one ideally suited to another as a lover or spouse."
Yes, it is possible to share a deep bond with someone. No, there is not one person who is ideally suited to you. But someone can certainly be really suited to you.

But if you are just asking "How picky should I be?", the answer is "very picky" :)

I think it's tosh personally.

The implication is that in a world full of people there is only one right for you.

I love DH deeply (and vice versa) and I can't imagine wanting someone else.

However if something happened to one of us I'd hate to think of either of us being alone for the rest of our lives.

Of course another relationship would be different- different personalities would create a different dynamic but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be as good or as fulfilling.

Truth is life is a series of chance meetings and chosen experiences - the cumulation of which allowed you to meet your partner.

If you could go back in time and just change a few random things you may never have met or met at a time when neither were looking for a long term relationship - the end result being you would be with someone else.

Yes, and 30+ years of marriage with all it's ups and downs, never lost the soul mate.

I believe in soulmates. Been married 34 years, since I was a teenager. I first just glimpsed the back of him in a crowded place, wasnt really paying attention, but a deep certainty, feeling, went right through me and I just thought "we are going to be together forever" I didnt even know him, had never even spoken to him before that. I didnt really fancy him either tbh, at first

A resounding no!

Nothing to do with me, I’m happily single. I was just reading a magazine and it had a story about soulmates so thought I’d ask, being bored at home.

I think so yes but I think you can have more than one....or at least there is always a reason for someone coming into your life.

I knew I’d marry DH as soon as I saw him, kind of like I’d known him forever.

I personally think most people who haven’t had that type of connection with someone would say no. But I believe in soulmates.

Soulmates is how ancient hinduism trapped women into abusive marriages. You don’t tend to leave when you believe your marriage will last for infinite reincarnations.

No. I've been with DH 26 years, we moved in together after 3 weeks and married within a year, but if I had never met him I would have met and married someone else.

No
It's just hormones

Nope. I don’t read Mills & Boon either 😂

A couple of my school friends have DHs with whom they are perfectly happy, and vice versa. They’ve had their ups and downs over the 35-40 years they’ve been together, because they’re two individuals who complement and support each other, making adjustments along the way. They love each other, but lasting love takes work. Soulmates is a wishy washy term uttered by people who want everything to just be magic.

No, I'm with Tim Minchin.

Not in the way that most people use the term, no.

But people who are perfectly matched? Sure, they exist.

I don't think they are. But you can find someone who ticks all the right boxes and it may feel like you've found gold/soul mate

Yes. But they tend not to necessarily make romantic partners. I made that mistake.

My best friend is 100% my soulmate. Our lives would be totally different - and not for the best - had we not met each other.

I love my DP dearly but our connection is very different.

No. People get on better with certain people, but I don’t believe in the concept of soulmates. It makes no sense

Yes.. however I think you have more than one in your life time.