Men what puts you off online dating profiles

[Dislocatedeyeballs]

Honestly? Just read another thread about what puts women off wondering what puts men off?

I think there’s a thread on here with witty responses to that @Zovir

I thought of another thing - first name and surname in their profile name. It just makes me very afraid for them.

The response I received from famousforwrongreason undelines the very reason why I am sometimes reticent about revealing my sex when I post on a thread! There are certain subjects which interest me and it is interesting to see and receive differing views, opinions and thoughts from others on the same topic. Good enough reason to use Mumsnet, I would have thought!

In response to the OP's original question, the following are what would be offputting for me. I no longer use dating websites, since I am now in a happy, settled relationship with my lovely partner and wonderful stepdaughter, and my dislikes are, of course, purely subjective, personal preference and not set in stone. But:

Tattoos - dislike them intensely on both men and women.

Profile pictures adorned with bunny noses, whiskers, halos of stars, flowers etc - too 'cutesy'.

Those who describe themselves as wanting to be treated like a 'princess' or 'queen'.

Those who like an urbancentric lifestyle - I am very rural and countryside focussed, therefore we would not be compatible.

Those who are in search of a 'knight on a white charger' - such things do not exist!

Those who list hobbies as shopping, eating out or are clearly very sporty - again, lack of compatibility.

That is it really, good job we are all different!

Beekeeper1

The response I received from famousforwrongreason

Name change fialures?

Just spotted this after replying to the other thread, but from my male perspectvie...
All photos plastered in make up, leaving the viewer not a clue what you actually look like.
Filters.
Duck face.
Pics from a distance on on top of a mountain where they're a spec in the distance - why bother?
Photos of a dog.
Selfies taken in a public toilet.
Blurred, poor quality photos.
Every pic is with a group of friends, often the same friends so there's no indication of who the profile is.
Photos of them with ex-partners.
Every photo is of them in a pub or club.
Tattoos.
Poor use of English.
Lack of any humility.
Semi aggressive, negative, almost hostile bios of all the things they don't want, making them sound like hard work and high maintenance.
Holding a glass of winer or gin up like it's their life crutch in every picture.
Listing their amazing packed and busy lives with their pets, kids and endless hobbies and interests that make the reader feel like they would be bottom of the pile and would maybe try and squeeze you into their packed and fulfilled life.

Yeah constant use of the bunny rabbit ears/equivalent snapchat filter is annoying. Yes it makes you look good. It makes everyone look good. No, you don’t look anything like that in real life.

I often wonder how funny 100% honest and realistic profiles of likes and dislikes would be be on both sides of the fence. All the things you want to say or want to ask but can't.

Another one that bugs me is if the woman is busty, every picture is in a low cut top to show off and exaggerate her boobs - assuming that's going to be a hit for all the men looking. It almost devalues the rest of the post and hints at her state of mind.

Job.... "I have one".

Comes across as bitter and cynical.

Another one I’ve seen a fair bit is: looking for someone to hold the door open for me and then slap my bum as I walk through. I mean, it’s all a bit carry on film isn’t it?

And also: not looking for someone to replace their father (in ref to their kids). Who on earth would think of doing that as a motivation to date?

Yup @ExTwitter - serious name change failure!

I read that the no.1 thing that attracts men to a females profile is the element of “playfulness”. Take from that what you will.

@Confusedbutheyho

Yes, that is an attractive element, along with warmth and not taking themselves too seriously.

Reading between the lines, there are some seriously bitter, scarred and damaged women out there - as there are men too.

@Confusedbutheyho yes, I can see that as first and foremost a date should be good fun, a laugh and relaxed. At least for me anyway.

Do women have the equivalent of the ubiquitous 'Man holding a carp' photo?

Is it the wine glass?

@PrawnSacrifice, aren’t you married?

@JoesExotic

I think it's the wine glass, dog hug or horse jump.

One that really put me off some time ago was a long range picture of the woman in question at a podium giving a speech to a large audience. It came across as very intimidating, to me at least.

Possibly the one on a night out standing between some angel wings ?

I don’t mind really, how often do we get good pics taken by others ? It’s most likely to come from a night out, dressed up and feeling relaxed with friends.

@MarkStronglyDirtyTalk

Yes, married, but have viewed online dating sites in previous times and seen or been shown enough to know what''s out there.

A couple of colleagues are avid users and OLD profiles and such like are frequent flyer discussions at lunch time "Have you seen this, take a look at that, what do you think of this, I got a message back from her etc, etc"

Righty-ho

@ExTwitter, indeed. My response might have been seen as harsh by some but it has already unearthed a man, on mumsnet with at least two usernames...

I met my DP online. I just asked him your question and he said women absolutely plastered in make up, or said a man would come second to their pet, or said they were high maintenance (who actually admits to that?!).

errrm he already said he namechanged, Miss marple. Seems ive uncovered a nutcase myself.

errrm he already said he namechanged, Miss marple. Seems ive uncovered a nutcase myself.

Nutcase? What delightfully ablist language.

So he says he's name changed, no reason given.
We share a lot of vulnerabilities here, on a women's site, on a board which predominantly discusses men, deception and red flags in dating.
what is the problem with me (and a pp) highlighting this?
As well as the unexplained namechange, the combative language used about women: lambasted, lions den, mauling, this isnt the language of someone who respects women or feels that we have anything at all in common, so why here?

Presumably you're the same guy on yet another profile @user1481840227

I read that the no.1 thing that attracts men to a females profile is the element of “playfulness”. Take from that what you will.

I included the word playful in my profile, along with rationale, independent etc. I meant it to convey I can be jocular and joke about a bit but from the messages I got, I clearly misjudged how it would be perceived! So I removed the word and then attracted the right sort of man for me.

Are you in Liverpool @hairyarsedman?