Can a narcissistic man ever love love their children!

[Fightingback16]

I guess I probably know the answer to this question but in my recovery form my abuse I kind of need validation of my actions. My husband was badly emotionally abusive and used my daughter who is almost 4 against me to evoke my emotions. I’ve gone no contact since December and he made a massive fuss, threatened me, retaliated angry and then upset etc etc but he still hasn’t applied for a contact order.

Do I need to accept that he never had and never will have any capability to love our little girl. She was just a pawn to get to me? It’s hard to accept these ideas, they are totally against human nature. I will do whatever I can do to keep her safe.

You can never love a narc enough! It's never enough. It's not just possible. And you'll never understand it. His view is so skewed, so abnormal and yes, there probably was no emotional connection - they are empty emotionally, and needy - it's about what you can give them, not the other way round. It's about their needs. It's always about them.

I so loved my ex. More than I've loved anyone ever. We had what I thought was an amazing connection, so much fun, lots of sex, etc . But it wasn't enough. You can't love a narc because they can't love.

I loved mine wholeheartedly until he started to hurt me then I was just scared and trapped. We had everything so I thought, he is an idiot.

No, but they will think they do. Actually they just see them as their right/possession. Sadly they are very good at convincing courts otherwise. Hopefully yours doesn't bother OP. Mine did but only because he could sit back while his girlfriend dealt with all the hard work and drove him to all the contacts. A couple of years on he still just sits back and let's her do everything while he makes out he's father of the year to all

I have a feeling mine will implode. He was a drug addict and self harmed before me. I don’t wish it on anyone but he has no source.

The thing to remember is that people are essentially a resource to be used by Narcs and while they can be useful so worth cultivating or they can be sort of fond of them like you might be with a pet if the person doesn’t fulfil their role they are of no use and are even a handicap
You also have to realise that other people are just supporting players on their stage or an audience, they don’t have and role themselves.

I feel so used. I know I’ve saved my little girl from the same fate but it still hurts like mad. He was literally killing my will to live and wrecking havoc with my mind and body. Such a small boy inside but a very dangerous man.