I'll keep this as short as I possibly can,anyone who got to the end......thank you for taking the time to read.
A few months ago my partner went to sweden with a running group. Things seemed off......normally hes someone who phones all the time and checks in but I only heard from him twice. When he came back he was constantly messaging another woman,I explained I wasnt comfortable with it and to respect how I felt,all well and good until he found another way to contact her. Deleted messages later and me going crazy I finally had enough! I contacted her husband who told me they had split weeks ago because of the same thing.......time went in and me being a prat I stayed with him,now as mad as this seems nothing sexual actually happened between them,it was more of an emotional affair. I explained after everything that I needed time to heal and not to put me in that same situation.........we were getting on great!
Then......just over a month ago,he told me that a guy from the running club he goes too asked him to work with this woman as she had alcohol issues,my partner is an alcoholic but has been sober for some time and works with people in substance misuse. Again I didnt feel massively comfortable as this was only a few months after everything had happened with the previous woman,again he reassured me it's not like that like and actually told me shes pathetic! So a couple of weeks went by and he lsrings it on me,I'm going for a run at 7pm......that I thought was too late to be running with some woman you barely know and baring in mind both me and our 5 year old son are at home. So of he goes,he gets back at just 9pm and said it was a good run and they spoke about her alcohol issues,fair enough I'll give him benefit of the doubt. The contact between them continues,we made a thing that Tuesdays was our day to go out together which I was looking forward too,he blew me out and stayed at home,when I returned in the afternoon the drills he had lent to this woman were in the hallway,I questioned him and said it's a bit strange how she drops them off on a day I'm not here.....? All he said was well it's not as if I've hidden them is it? Ok I thought and left it as that. He asked me to drop him off running one morning,I said no problem but the next morning he told me she was taking him,I lost my shit im afraid......we got in to a blazing row I asked him to get out,I left that late morning and came back to find he had gone. I thought he was probably in a hotel,he returned the next morning at 8.30am claiming him stayed in a hotel and went and had a bath. Later on the night we started again bickering at each other......he stayed in the living room and I went to bed,I noticed his phone on the floor and saw a message on watsapp from her! I went along with a few messages pretending to be him and she started saying how she wished she was cuddling him etc.....I phoned her off his phone,she answered and I went crazy on the phone to her! I went through his phone(not happy to admit) found a screenshot from her to him saying how he looked so handsome when he was asleep and that she was mund blown with how she felt and even on the very first day she met him she had feelings etc.....there was plenty more messages before but clearly he had deleted them! I phoned her again that morning after she messaged me on his phone saying how she wanted nothing to do with him etc and she spoke to him about not losing what he had! I confronted her about the message and said he didnt stay in a hotel did he? She said no he stayed at mine......then she tried to lie and say it was some where else bit didnt deny the fact they stayed together! Even after I warned her off she still carried on pursuing him......so I sent the screen shots to her husband!!!!! To top it off when I emptied the bag he had taking I found a pair of boxers with blood smears in them(like a monthly cycle) and he tried to claim it was from his man bits from running which is absolute rubbish as hes got no sores no nothing there and it was all up the front of his boxers and around where the manhood sits,plus I found her sock un his bag and she didnt deny that they had sex but he is! And to this day he has spoken to her but not in that context,on a running app he has when I feel all contact from this woman should stop! I don't why I'm still with him......km struggling to be physical in any shape or form let alone the bedroom,hes convinced hes done nothing wrong and gets defensive everytime I mention it,I have no one to talk too.....I cant sleep and I'm struggling hugely with all of this!!!!
Thank you for taking your time to read if you got this far any advice is very much appreciated!