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Original poster

Is it ok to meet with boyfriend who I don't live with and go on a socially distant walk?

204 replies

Shineonyou · 18/04/2020 17:15

I haven't seen him in weeks. Thought about meeting and going for a walk in the very nearby countryside where we can walk at least two metres away from each other for exercise and a chat.

Is this allowed?

OP posts:
namechangenumber2 · 19/04/2020 01:18

Ah yes that is a good point name, I can't imagine what it's like to live alone at the moment Sad

scoobdoob · 19/04/2020 01:20

the gatherings are funerals and essential meetings that have to be face to face

Rubybluesy · 19/04/2020 01:20

I think it's ok as long as you keep 2m apart? Just like shopping

CatAndHisKit · 19/04/2020 01:35

gathering of two people ARE allowed if 2m apart, it's clear in the guidelines. If more than two people, then only from the same household.

But then you have to weigh up how essential that gathering of two is.
If you live alone and avoid the shops, and need to meet up once a week with DP or friend but stay 2m apart and not indoors - and if feel your mental health is seriously suffering, do it.
If you start meeting several friends per week this way, that's non-essential!

Govt tends to repeat the phrase 'use commin sense', so some leeway if it's essential for your phyaical/mental health. Same as children are allowed to see both parents living separately.

CatAndHisKit · 19/04/2020 01:36

*common sense

BiarritzCrackers · 19/04/2020 01:37

I wonder why they put 'two people' in the legislation, when they general guidance says 'no-one'.

The initial interpretations in news sources went with 'no more than two', but I haven't seen it expressed like that recently (this from 24th March reflects the wording some of us recall, and is what's in the legislation www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-52012432)

I thought maybe they left it at two, to have a bit of flexibility for people living alone - so that they could have a distanced walk with someone, to just have a bit of human contact.

HugeAckmansWife · 19/04/2020 07:24

I agree that many posters on here probably don't live alone. I am in the same situation as the op. DP and I don't live together for very good reasons - it does not mean we are not serious or committed. I haven't had a proper adult conversation face to face for about 4 weeks now. When my kids are with their dad (who came closer than 2m when we exchange) I'm 100% alone. I'm OK. One of those 'resilient' types but lots aren't and I think the very dismissive posters 'ffs no' types are being unfair. You can still say you think it's unwise but as others have pointed out, actually the legislation does say no more than 2, so legally I think it's OK. If it's no in your opinion, then fine, but have some empathy.

litterbird · 19/04/2020 07:52

I do find that the ones that jump up and down and say NO! Don’t live alone. I live alone but live in a village full of people I know do my hour walk around the village is full of socially distant conversations with friends and neighbours out and about too. However, I don’t live with my boyfriend. It was incredibly painful at first being away from him but we chose to continue this way. We chat on FaceTime and text. He lives 2 hours away so even more difficult. I would, however, have met up for a walk 2 metres apart on a regular basis if he was closer. That would be for my mental health purposes. Please, those who are happily ensconced in you wonderful bubble of life with you gorgeous partner and children having a wonderful love filled time together, don’t judge those who aren’t and have compassion for those who live alone through this. We have a right to have a chat to people in real life too.

Sunshine1239 · 19/04/2020 08:51

Just apply common sense

Many people are working

Many people still nipping our for exercise and going to shops - these people, myself included, having noticed a huge difference in their day to day lives

Then you have others massively isolated and suffering much more - furloughed, living alone and hardly meeting anyone

You could meet your boyfriend everyday and your impact on this would be minimal compared to mine so don’t feel guilty

In another three weeks I imagine it’ll be business as usual work wise

Sunshine1239 · 19/04/2020 08:52

That should say haven’t noticed a huge difference in their day

Quartz2208 · 19/04/2020 08:55

Because it’s under point 13 meeting in parks. It makes it clear in the guidance I think that gatherings of 2 should be public open space

Now this isn’t about whether it’s a good idea etc but yes according to the law it is fine for them to walk a open space together

Windmillwhirl · 19/04/2020 09:02

When I walk around the supermarket or go on my own walk alone I pass people at an acceptable level.

I meet my bf for walks. We both live alone and are still working. As long as you keep your distance what is the harm?

TheDailyCarbuncle · 19/04/2020 09:03

Have a row with your toaster. Then you can go and live with him.

Or don't listen to the total numpties on here saying that you can't see/talk to a person. Seeing people is not illegal - if you leave your house you'll see people. Talking to people is also not illegal. If the person you see and talk to happens to be your boyfriend rather than a neighbour, then happy days.

Babdoc · 19/04/2020 09:03

DD2 and her boyfriend do this. They both live alone and work from home, so see literally nobody apart from the once a week supermarket trip.
Their flats are a quarter mile apart, so they walk 2 metres apart into the hills or down to the beach, have a conversation while maintaining distance and then walk back. They’re both v fit, and have done 20km in a day at weekends. As they’re in Scotland, the places where they walk are relatively deserted, and they do not risk exposure to other people.
I think it would be unnecessarily cruel to force two young people into solitary confinement for weeks on end. It’s bad enough that they aren’t allowed to hug, or even touch each other. I live alone myself, (long widowed) and relish the brief 2m distant chats with people in their gardens as I pass on my walks.

Beansandcoffee · 19/04/2020 09:11

You are an adult. Just be sensible. It you have both been careful, working from home, not coming into contact with frontline workers then I don’t see a problem. It’s a gathering of 2 people and you are exercising in the fresh air. Will probably be wonderful for your wellbeing. It’s all very well people who live with husbands, partners, etc saying no but they need to think how it must feel for those who live on their own and don’t see or speak to other adults.

userxx · 19/04/2020 09:14

It's more riskier doing a supermarket shop, I'd do it. I've seen a few of my friends this way 👍

HonestCentrist · 19/04/2020 09:19

A gathering of 2 people is allowed.

thebridgelooksbroken · 19/04/2020 10:52

for goodness sake, why not? Don't listen to bossy pants like @fourpeasinapod "kindly ask you" wtf.

sonjadog · 19/04/2020 12:11

I have done this. We stay 2+m apart at all times. I don't see the temptation to get closer is that much of an issue as some poster make out tbh. Yes, I would love to get closer, but we aren´t that low on impulse control that we are unable to stop ourselves. We know we can't get closer so we don´t. It isn't that hard.

amber763 · 19/04/2020 12:21

I live alone as ive mentioned in other threads. I miss my other half soooo much and my mum and friends. 2 people I know are in hospital (not close friends or anything) and a man I work with has died so maybe I'm OTT but I'd rather put up with missing him than die. As someone else said the gatherings referred to are funerals and the likes. I do wonder if I find it easier because my dad was in the military so I was used to us being separated as a family for long periods. I just think if everyone bends the guidance to suit then what's the point. Maybe I'll start feeling differently as more time passes. Anyway hope you managed to make a decision you're happy with.

HowCowBrownNow · 19/04/2020 12:22

I live on an estate and there are people having visitors round. I thought one bloke lived in the flats opposite me but it turned out he goes to his best mate's for his dinner every night. I had had a brief chat with him as I was looking at a chip on my windscreen. Not condoning it but I feel for people living alone.

Also an unfamiliar vehicle was parked outside my house, I was arriving home from work in my car, (I'm not a curtain twitcher)
and the occupants went in the flats.

As I was going out for my walk they came out later with some young lads one of them said 'thank you Auntie' and hugged each other!

There are people everywhere not adhering to it.

lialiana · 19/04/2020 12:36

How are you going to get to your meeting point? Can you walk there? If you're driving, you really don't want to be breaking down or having an accident, you are technically adding in an unnecessary journey which carries risks.

I totally feel where you're coming from. I'm not meeting up with my partner because what I miss is the physical contact and I can't get that and comply with social distancing, so we're sticking with video calls every day. It sucks, it's lonely, but it's not forever.

MiddlesexGirl · 19/04/2020 16:45

Driving somewhere to do your exercise is fine as per the recently released police guidelines.

Mabelface · 19/04/2020 18:41

The mental health aspect is massively important. Seeing me a couple of times a week for a half hour, 2m apart walk helps keep my bf going. Contrary to the beliefs of some here, as adults, we're quite capable of not leaping into each others arms.