Is this normal

[cjb8]

It is normal for words in arguments to get so bad, he tells you that you're a nobody, a dog, a state?

Are these things you could personally move past and get over?

No, I don't think so. Ex H used to call me a fucking idiot, etc. I thought that if I said the same to him then I was standing up for myself. But actually the best way to stand up for myself was to leave and not give him the opportunity to every demean me again.

That's not normal, no. He sounds horrible.

My self worth is on the floor. And the only way he will "make up" is if I say sorry, even though I have no blame in the situation

It’s not normal and it’s not okay. You’re worth so much more.

Why do you want to make up? Break up sounds more appealing..

It's not normal and it's not OK.

These are all classic abuse tactics, OP. Do you have any where to go?

Definitely not normal or acceptable

NO it's not okay.

No. He's a cunt

If you have to ask if it's normal, it's not. I'm sorry. You deserve better 🌹🌹

Tonight's made me realise I actually don't like him as a person. He's so nasty with his words.

No, it's NOT okay and it's NOT acceptable. You deserve 100x better.

@SharonasCorona
Current situation-no, but I'm strong headed no matter how he makes me feel and I can handle it for now. We have children together and after things settle down in the world, I think I need to leave

Do your children hear him talking to you like that?

@AnneLovesGilbert
No, not yet anyway

No, it's verbal and emotional abuse.

No, it is not OK and the longer it continues the worse it will get. Do NOT apologise to this piece of shit.

I'd sooner live with him NOT speaking to me rather than me 'apologise' when I've done nothing wrong and he's been as nasty as he can verbally.

I'd also be very tempted, when I was leaving, to tell him ''I knew we would split eventually as soon as we'd had our first sex. I prefer my men to be man size, not fun size !''

What a cunt. My husband has never called me a dog or a state in nearly 20 years together

Nasty little man. Spiteful. Fuck him off.

It’s abuse.
Is he breaking things yet? Is he hitting yet?
Whose name is on the lease?
Get some help- you and your children need a safe, respectful, and peaceful home.

No, people who say things like that to their partner shouldn't expect to stay in s relationship.

And as for apologising to someone who's said things like that (and was no doubt equally at fault or more for the argument) .... No.

www.docdroid.net/py03/why-does-he-do-that-pdf

Very good book - about all kinds of abuse even though it focuses on physical.abuse.

www.docdroid.net/py03/why-does-he-do-that-pdf

Sorry I don't know how I managed to post the link twice

a nobody, a dog, a state

All those are especially nasty, really demeaning.

Perhaps you should ask him where his self esteem and self respect is - since he chooses to stay in a relationship with a "nobody", "dog" and "state", why isn't he leaving. If he says his kids, you should say that noone should stay with someone so far beneath them for the kids, someone they're not happy with for kids - drowning all their potential and selling themself so short. He needs to leave and find someone on his level or his life is wasted.

🙄.

Lay your plans, do your research, see how you'd manage financially etc. and gtf rid of him when it suits you best op - this sort of person very rarely changes.