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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Just been sent unsolicited picture

50 replies

CoronaVera · 04/04/2020 14:37

Wasn't sure where to put this.

Am at home by myself and no-one IRL to talk to.

Someone I know who I have several mutual close friends with and I once upon a time - years ago - said that I had been attracted to, has totally unsolicited sent me a selfie with his top raised up and hand in his boxers.

Obviously I won't respond except to say, inappropriate, don't do that if he tries to engage again. I am single but don't want a relationship with this man, especially if he thinks this is cute or funny.

Just needed to vent. Feel shocked and it's interrupted my much needed day off from work.

OP posts:
SomeoneElseEntirelyNow · 04/04/2020 14:38

"Oh this is embarrassing, i think you've sent this to the wrong number"

And then PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN AND WALK AWAY

Merename · 04/04/2020 14:39

Eugh, certainly not cute or funny. Tell him no more and if he does it again go straight to cops as this is illegal.

LIZS · 04/04/2020 14:39

And block

Original poster
CoronaVera · 04/04/2020 14:39

Do I even want to respond at all? I don't want to encourage him.

I'm half expecting a sheepish apology, I got the wrong person thing.

OP posts:
Lightofthephoenix · 04/04/2020 14:40

"Oh this is embarrassing, i think you've sent this to the wrong number"

Like that reply

Lightofthephoenix · 04/04/2020 14:41

Would you like me to send on to your parent/friend so they can see what a sleaze all you have turned into?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/04/2020 15:13

Do not at all engage with him. This was designed to upset or otherwise intimidate you.

I would call 101 and discuss this with the Police. They are really the best people to advise here.

Thehop · 04/04/2020 15:16

Either go with @SomeoneElseEntirelyNow response or ignore and block

poppadopolis · 04/04/2020 15:19

I would call 101 and discuss this with the Police. They are really the best people to advise here.

Please tell me you are being sarcastic.

PlywoodPlank · 04/04/2020 15:19

Just block him without responding.

PlywoodPlank · 04/04/2020 15:21

Save this and anything else that he sends from now on through any channel, but don't respond.

SarahTancredi · 04/04/2020 15:22

Just ignore.

A reaction is what they want. Do not even give them the chance to pretend it was an accident to try and make u feel like u are the one with the problem.

Block their number

AgentJohnson · 04/04/2020 15:22

How about, “I didn’t ask for this, do it again and I will view it as harassment and forward it to the Police”.

I like SomeoneElseEntirelyNow response but it doesn’t make it clear that you don’t want to engage in conversation.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/04/2020 15:24

No I was not being bloody sarcastic; I was being serious here poppa.

Why should anyone, let alone in these times, have to blithely put up with such unwanted contact from such entitled men?.

Smellbellina · 04/04/2020 15:24

I agree with @AgentJohnson

AttilaTheMeerkat · 04/04/2020 15:25

OP should at the very least maintain radio silence here and not at all respond to this from him.

justanotherneighinparadise · 04/04/2020 15:25

Why not just block?

KatherineJaneway · 04/04/2020 15:26

"Oh this is embarrassing, i think you've sent this to the wrong number"

This ^^

Page3 · 04/04/2020 15:29

A plain fuck off would work 🙂

Original poster
CoronaVera · 04/04/2020 15:58

I haven't responded.

I could block but I regularly see this man in real life. Not so much now due to restrictions but he works near my work and I bump into him every now and then when I go to buy lunch.

It's a rural area, everyone knows everyone type situation.

OP posts:
LonginesPrime · 04/04/2020 16:03

This was designed to upset or otherwise intimidate you.

It sounds like it was designed as an immature and gross way of saying 'are you up for sex?'.

Still not ok, though - just block him, OP.

simone1863 · 04/04/2020 16:06

Send him a similar picture back of a random guy off the internet. If he gets in touch through other means say you changed your number a month or two ago.

Lockdown will be long. Enjoy it.

spongedog · 04/04/2020 16:11

I was going to say post picture on the local facebook group and ask if anyone is missing a perve as you seem to have had one delivered by mistake. My local facebook group would love it as there is a very strong sense of humour on the group. The administrator from the group in the next town would ban you for life as they are very stuck up.

But I do think at the moment the police are probably, sadly too busy to take it as seriously as we would hope they should.

HotCrossBungle · 04/04/2020 16:16

I could block but I regularly see this man in real life

This shouldn't stop you! Don't worry about things being akward if you bump into him in real life because HE certainly gives no fucks about that does he?

BackseatCookers · 04/04/2020 16:23

I could block but I regularly see this man in real life. Not so much now due to restrictions but he works near my work and I bump into him every now and then when I go to buy lunch.

This is more reason to block him as he will then know not to do it again and also approach you.

If you don't block then he might be such a wanker he thinks you didn't mind and were just shy (I'm assuming he's as socially stupid as he sounds for sending that picture) and come up and talk to you.

Because men like him are so arrogant they think you've received the message and swooned 🤢 And if you're hesitant to block him now then imagine having to deal with it in person!

You sound confrontation adverse so when put on the spot you would likely be polite and then kick yourself afterwards.

One of the only benefits of lockdown is that you can block and and delete then not have to see someone for ages.

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