Looking back, can you see any red flags with your husband?
There are compiled lists of red flags. www.lifehack.org/375731/50-red-flags-you-should-watch-for-your-relationship
Try and move forward with an open heart knowing that you did nothing wrong and that not all men are deceitful,
@mamato3lads I do think it's worth being cautious/protectiong ourselves though, as there are a lot of twats and users around. There's nothing wrong with learning things from the experience that we can apply in future.
@Poppy54 How about thinking about what you would not put up with- and just drawing a line when you see any sign of it, or at least after one chance?
For myself I don't like if people make insulting/mocking comments about your figure or something - it's a sign of disrespect and we can't let them get away with it.
I also had a lover who was sexually exploitative, coercive, manipulative. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3800172-Is-it-ok-for-a-lover-to-ask-repeatedly-for-sex-acts-he-knows-you-dont-want
I knew from when I first heard from him that he was sleazy, as one woman put it he's 'pushy and creepy' with many women. He hung around on FB etc until a particularly vulnerable time in my life. So, now if any bloke gives me that spider sense/the creeps I block as soon as possible. With my health I can't risk having them lurking around.
Also my ex had a weir narcissistic habit I've rarely experienced in others- he would declare to some people that he couldn't see/msg us for a while due to his supposed mental health, while still seeing those friends he prioritized. I believe he literally had lists of who was in group 1 or 2 (narcissists always have mental lists of who is currently most useful to them etc) and as I had been raped and was a bit messed up at the time I was no longer pure sexual fun and so I was one of those sent the 'round robin' that I was temporarily binned.
Sadly enough I let him pick me up again when he wanted- I even fought to make him value me again and when I supposedly won his friendship/close friendship I felt honoured! 
The temporary dropping I would not put up with again, if I realized someone was doing it (most people probably don't spell it out as clearly as he did. It was a red flag that he was a manipulative user with his eye only on his own feelings.
If someone tried to do that to me now, I'd just go 'nope, I don't have people in my life that do that' and block.
Don't get me wrong, everyone has phases where they don't feel like coming out, but this was somehow different (maybe it was more obvious because I knew he was still seeing other friends regularly several evenings a week.) I suppose again it's a sign of disrespect/they don't value you.
Excuse the long winded post!