I work FT in London and rent a small (but perfectly formed!) apartment with my one child left at home who is in yr13. I also own a property 90 mins away, a larger house which happens to be (coincidentally) in the city dp grew up in. Idea being once yr13 SN child goes to uni, I will spend more time in the house and probably let the apartment go.
Dp lost his job last year and has been doing some work for friend's companies but for v little money though he keeps promising me they will give him equity (I will believe it when I see it). I have a v long hours, stressful job - I commute by train and Dp and I share one car. I like to know what Dp is doing and where he will be in case I need to give yr13 SN child a lift to his clubs.
Dp, once a week for the last 4 weeks, has been going up to the house and 'working' on his friend's projects (they all live in the city where the house is). I know when he goes he wants to stay the night - he gets the house to himself and can do what he wants. But every time he goes, he tells me he's coming back. And every single bloody time he starts making excuses late evening - so either saying ' you must be tired, I don't want to come back late so I'll stay here so I don't disturb you' or 'my meeting only finished now and there's dreadful traffic and I've arranged a meeting at 8am here tomorrow to save me coming up again' etc etc
I know it sounds ridiculous but if he told me before he went up that he planned on staying, I genuinely would not give a monkeys. But the fact that he makes out that it's all about saving me being disturbed or better for me that it saves a trip for him is actually making me really pissed off.
I just cannot stand people who can't tell the truth and play with your emotions - have I lost my mind or would this wind you up too? I even said this time, are you going to stay? And he said no, I can't wait to see you later so I'll be back by 8 and it's 9 now and I'm just waiting for the 'sorry my meeting just finished and it's a bit late to drive back'