Was this a bit flirty?

[Flairhead]

I signed up to OLD again a couple of weeks ago and yesterday I got a message from a guy I used to work with. We were in the same department for a while, didn't speak very much but I always thought he was good looking and I did fancy him, I think he liked me too, but I was with my now ex so nothing ever happened.

A few years ago he got married, then got a job with another company, so left and I haven't seen him since.

Then yesterday, he messaged me through the OLD site saying 'looks like both our marriages have gone to shit. Good luck' followed by a thumbs up emoji. We exchanged a few messages, general catching up, and he said there were always vacancies at his company and I could easily move up to supervisor level within a year, finishing by saying 'I could even interview you' followed by a laughing emoji.

I do like this guy, although I'm not looking to move jobs, but could this maybe be interpreted as a bit flirty? In which case should I keep chatting? I thought maybe leave it to the end of the week and send a message just saying hi, how are you, etc.

Urgh, I'm so bad at this. Advice welcome!

• messaging

Although massaging would be nice :)

@Flairhead

Let us know for what it's worth, he would not have taken the time to specifically message you on a dating website if not interested.... and you say you got the "feeling" he liked you when at work...

If you like him I would definitely message again, casual at first.

Nothing ventured nothing gained

I'll leave things until Saturday and message him then, unless he messages me first! I'll let you all know!

Agree with those who've said its spectacularly unsexy if either of you is trying to flirt! I'd take it as more of a 'wave' as he spotted someone he knew on there, rather than anything else.

Obviously you could still meet up and maybe see if there's anything going on in person, because if you're relying on your texting banter you'll both bore the fuck out of each other

I noticed a neighbour on POF when I was dating so I sent him a message kind of saying 'fancy seeing you here', we met up for a drink and chatted about life in general. I took a good photo of him out enjoying himself to use on his profile too but there was never any suggestion that we fancied each other, more of a coincidental bumping into each other thing.

Any update?

Sounds like he’s trying to recruit you for a MLM.

If he starts calling you hun or hashtagging his messages with #bossbabe, run!

Other than that, if he’s interested he’s doing a dire job of showing it! 😬

Plus the whole “she moved out in October, still married blah blah” might ring a teeny tiny alarm bell for me.

I sent in my CV and messaged him to tell him. No reply yet but he may not have been online. I'm not too concerned by what he's saying about his ex having moved out tbh, he's got no reason to lie to me, I haven't seen him for a few years and he knows I knew he was married. Of course I might be being naive there but I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt about that.

What's MLM?

Younique or Herbalife or some shit!

Haha, it's definitely not that, the company he works for is legit!

I would definitely say he’s interested. His flirting skills may need work but so do a lot of people’s. Perhaps he’s not very forward or confident in asking you out or scared of the rejection. He’s messaged you to break the ice. I doubt he would have bothered if he wasn’t interested!
Fingers crossed you hear back from him OP.

He's flirting but he isn't ready to date.

When OLD guys wives left them, they're only 6 months separated (not even divorced) and they say they "just came on to see what's out there"... nothing good can come of it. Ghosting or a slow fade is most likely.

He's rebounding so hard he risks breaking something. Don't let that something be your heart.

Still no reply...... I'm hoping that he just hasn't been online rather than just not said anything......

Well, I got an interview. Messaged him to tell him, then later I checked and his profile has gone! So I found him on Facebook and sent a message through that. He got back to me and says he's met someone (that was quick!) so deleted his profile.

He seems quite happy for me to ask questions and says he's been singing my praises to the team which is nice of him. Looks like nothing will happen date wise but at least we're back in touch. I'm in two minds about the job itself but I'll go to the interview and see what happens!

Oh dear. Looks like he wasn’t being flirty after all.

I reckon he is still married.Messaged you for a bit of late night flirting ( it's always more of an ego boost if you know the person),then got cold feet and deleted his profile. He'll be back on there in a month.

In all honestly I didn’t see any flirting in his messages.

I think it was reaching/wishful thinking!

I did think the married thing aswell. Was probably worried he would be spotted on there again.

Yes I read the texts and saw zero flirting from either of you! And yes he was either always with his wife or decided to give it another go.

The first messages I got from him were on a Sunday afternoon, nothing late night about it, but yeah, thinking about it there was very little flirting! He has given me some advice on preparing for the interview as well. Hopefully I'll get to see him when I go in, it would be nice to see him at least.