What would happen if...?

[allgonetoshite]

My child told nursery his Dad hit me?

I'm terrified I'm gonna lose my kids?

What has happened?

I don't want to be too specific. So silly but I'm scared he'll somehow find this post and know I wrote it. But my son definitely saw his father throw things at me and hit me and now I'm scared he'll say something at nursery tomorrow.

Seeing his mother abused is a form of child abuse. If he tells nursery they may well make a referral to a social worker.

This does not mean you will lose your child. Children are rarely removed from their parents, as it's known they do better with their parents than they do in care. It's also a very long process. That is the least of your worries, quite honestly.

You need to leave your abusive partner and take your child with you. Contact Women's Aid for help to go to a refuge, where you and your child will be safe.

If he says something at nursery it will be recorded as a safeguarding concern. It should be referred to a safeguarding hub who will most likely refer it to social services.

The reason all this will happen is because your child is not safe in this environment and these people will recognise that and see the need to do something about it.

You are also not safe in that environment. The best thing you can do is take this into your own hands and get it sorted now. Contact the police or women's aid. You are not alone and you can do this.

Ok. I don't just have one child, I have four. How am I going to get us and our essentials out and where do I go? I can't drive. He controls all the money. I have nothing. Not even credit on my phone.

I need to go somewhere far away because he will look for me.

Help is available. Contact Women's Aid, they are there to help you. I once worked with a woman who had been moved 300 miles to get away from an abusive partner. She had help from Women's Aid, Social Services and the Council.

God bless you - you need help to escape this situation. Keeping children in this kind of household will see them being removed - no doubt about it

I really want to. I really wanna go but it feels so impossible.

I want to call somebody or something but it's making me feel sick. I'm just really scared.

He is on the birth certificate so if I just go will he not be able to contact the police and say I've taken them without his consent or something?

National Domestic Violence Helpline – 0808 2000 247

Call them, they will help you work out the details. They will know what services are available in your area and what is the best way to deal with it. Do you have time in your own when he's not there?

When did he last assault you OP? Was it in the last two weeks?

You're not going to get in trouble for taking them away to keep them safe. Do you have family nearby?

He did this this morning then left. I don't know where he is or when he'll be back.

I have no family.

Really good advice here OP. Definitely call the Domestic Violence helpline, and Womens Aid for advice. Are you ok??

Contact the NCDV and ask them about an Emergency Occupation Order: 0800 970 2070

Contact the police 101 and report the physical violence.

Call them now while he's not there.

Stay calm, you've done exactly the right thing in asking for help. Get some proper advice from women's aid. The police may be able to prevent him from returning but I'm not sure how it works and wouldn't want to steer you wrong. Are you injured?

I know it's hard I really do , but if social services get involved as a result of your son telling nursery they could be removed because your failing to protect them also as they are witness to such abuse I'm not saying his will happen but could happen ... you need to contact women's aid they will support you and keep you safe.. you can claim benefits in your own right but it's about the here and now as soon as you can get some hits together and make the call but makes sure it's safe to do so

Nursery will call SS. Most definitely.

You poor love x

Make the phone call now.

Ring women's aid now, also police and tell them he has assaulted you and you as your need to leave before h comes back. Good luck - you won't regret leaving. You are showing your children they shouldn't accept behaviour like that. Very brave of you.

Speak to Women's Aid and domestic abuse services in your area.

Woman's Aid has an online chat and phone services www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/

Consider a refuge.

And the SS will want you to keep your dc safe, so will support you leaving him and would only be concerned about you as a parent if you went back to him.