Fiance drinking

[Kitchen1234]

Hi we are getting married in 5 months time. My partner has drank all his life and stopped 5 weeks ago but has started drinking at weekends and doesn't see a problem since it's the weekend. He knows I don't like him drinking as he changes from the best man ever to falling out with me constantly after he drinks...I don't know whether to go ahead with wedding even though i love him to pieces. Will he ever stop to save our relationship

Exactly what I was about to say @AnotherEmma.
Life is too short for that shit. Just get out now before you marry him.

Your totally right...after speaking to everyone here I can see I knew it all along but wouldn't admit it to myself until now

You cant spend your life dreading weekends, it's no way to live.

thank you....I agree

Good to see the scales are falling and you are seeing things the way they truly are.

Living with a drunk is a nightmare. Ruin every holiday or special occasion. Always being on edge when going out afraid they are going to do something stupid and end up in a fight or in jail. The irrational arguments where you're always blamed.
The smell. It just reeks through their pores.

Holidays are 24/7 drinking

I so understand this. Many of us have lived it. Their health becomes poor over time. Can think of quite a few who died from alcohol related disease and cancer.

Does he have grown children? How is their relationship? Any with alcohol or drug issues?

Life's too short to saddle yourself with a miserable life with a drunk.

His kids are 17 and 19 hardly sees them anymore

That’s says it all too.

His adult children likely have had enough of him as well. For such men the drink always takes priority over everything and everyone else.

You need to consider in the longer term what is it that attracted you to him in the first place. The fact too that you grew up seeing people drink heavily too has left its mark.

Please please please do not marry. Having lived with ex dp for 5 years the alcohol killed our relationship. Actually it nearly killed me.
Would be nothing for him to drink 2 bottles of red wine a night after going to the pub on the way home from work. Holidays were an 'excuse' to drink all day every day. He also created arguments to make excuses to drink. I could never relax and he was constantly driving over the limit.
He won't change. Please please call it off.
Gut feelings are there for a reason

@Kitchen1234 my ex partners older children don't speak to him much anymore, similar ages. They probably knew the truth about him before me and hoped he would change for me. He didn't.

I threw mine out late December 2017. DDs saw him once after that because it was necessary for an administrative formality, but they refused all contact with him otherwise. They were 15 and 17. It says it all.

I hope you're serious about ending this relationship, you will be saving yourself so much heartache.

Glad you came here and posted. You have the self-reflection and insight to know this isn't good for you.

So he’s a similar age to you and still thinks a good time/stress release = drinking to excess? Most of us have grown up by now.

As has been said, this is his personality. And he hasn’t changed for anyone else (even his kids) so he won’t change for you.

💐

Hello Kitchen1234, how are you? 🌺

As someone who’s just been through a big as I know my H has something in his system- don’t do it. Life is too short for this 😭

According to MN, if you have a few drinks you are a raging alcoholic! Obviously, the problem is, not how much he drinks but how he acts when he has had those drinks. You are not compatible, he won't quit drinking (and why should he) and you don't like him when he has had a drink. You need to end it.

Parky one of his sessions is a bottle of wine and about 5 beers - that's 20 units. In one session. That isn't 'having a few drinks', that's a major binge.

And 'needing it to relax' is also a very bad sign. Someone who has a healthy relationship with alcohol can relax without it.