Please help me to sleep in bed with my DP

[Rosequartz7]

I'm a really light sleeper and he snores, that the main thing.
I was on my own with DS for 9 years before he moved in, so only got woken up by insomnia from anxiety which is now much better, DS coming in for a bit when he was younger, or if he was ill, but hes now 12 so have been sleeping okay for years and I'm used to my own space at night.
Currently its ended up DP or I sleep in the spare room every night, we try sleeping together sometimes but within about 30 mins I'm in the spare room as he breathes and snores loudly
We're buying our first home together - a flat with 2 bedrooms and a tiny lounge so we will have to sleep together imminently.
We've tried:
Me: lavender oil, sleeping tablets (make me dopey for work so not great) CBD oil, ear plugs, saving for a weighted blanket.
Him: GP for nose spray, one of those head strap things that keep your mouth shut, nose strips,various things that go up his nostrils, antihistamines, asking for nose surgery as he cant breathe well lying down (his neck isnt big enough and he's not overweight at all so they said he isnt allowed) he has been so good.
I love him dearly and just want to sleep in with him every night.
Has anyone got any advice? Will try anything!

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07PMRG7HG/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s00?psc=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&ie=UTF8

Sorry I am no good at links, they are probably not the best you can buy but I was desperate and they work a treat for me. Really easy to pair up with a phone, if sleep really evades me I also listen to podcasts and try and just rest.

@HelloDoris thanks, they look ideal, I've downloaded the sleep/rain app and will give them a go :)

Did he ever have his nose broken?? My x had to have surgery, something to do with cartilage.

C-pap machines are expensive if you get them privately but they really do cure the problem like magic.

I have the same issue with my partner and nothing helps. He sleeps in the kids room when it’s really bad and to be honest I like sleeping on my own now

I use an air purifier for the white noise.

You have to beg for a referral nowadays it seems!

Can you afford a private consultation with an ENT specialist? Then he can get a proper opinion and go back on the NHS for any treatment he needs

As you grow older, your septum can change (and become kind of saggier) until you can't breathe through your nose. I had this issue, got a rhinoplasty and discovered that I must have actually had trouble breathing through my nose all my life - I just didn't have any comparison!
They can do a test to measure how much air you can breathe in through your nose.

White noise - it does help. Either a fan, or you can get a white noise machine off amazon for about 30 quid.

We’ve been having the same problem, but it’s me that’s the snorer, I get very bad sinus problems as well, right side constantly blocked, and waking every morning to find husband gone to the sofa was getting me down and making him tired, a friend suggested going dairy free and I’m on day 15 of dairy free and day 10 of us sleeping together successfully, I’m much less nasally, and the bad heads are definitely less frequent already, I’m not missing milk or butter but I’m missing cheese. Might be a happy coincidence, it’s such early days.

@Pinksmyfavoritecolour we are both vegan so it rules that out, no dairy definitely makes a big difference with inflammation anywhere in the body I found glad its helping. My psoriasis disappeared!
I think pressing for more medical intervention for him sounds like the way forward long term and for the short term, sleep earphones and white/rain noise for me.

Can anyone recommend a mouth guard??

Mouth guard - do NOT buy one 'over the counter'. Amazon is full of them, and they won't work. Mouth guards for snoring also have the highest rate of clearly fake reviews, so that should tell you all you need to know!

You need to make a dentist appointment and get them to make and fit one. A dentist can also advise whether it will make a difference or not - if the issue is a deviated septum or narrow passage it may not be the best option.

DH went through the British Snoring Association or something like that and bought a mouth guard that they recommended. It works really well.

The wax earplugs in Home Bargains are amazing. I use them camping on a dairy farm. Research how to put them in effectively.

Hope you find the answer to this! My ex snored (still does according to my daughter) and I ended up in the spare room. He went to the doctor once and then nothing. Said it's not his fault. No, it wasn't his fault but it wasn't mine either I wanted some goddamn sleep 😫

Even if you don't have a another room to sleep in what about sleeping in a separate bed? Even a small amount of distance will reduce the noise to a lower, more consistent level and make it easier to cope with using earplugs or headphones.

I second the custom mouth guard, it basically saved my relationship after DP moved in and I was like a zombie I was so sleep deprived. DP got it from a dentist (not his usual one as they didn't do them), it cost about £400 but it was like magic and I can't recommend it enough

Could also try getting him to sleep on his side (using a pregnancy pillow) or just sleeping more upright with an extra pillow?

Just to add - I've heard the problem can possibly be polyps (suggested by my doctor when I went for snoring) - something to maybe look into.

Britain’s Loudest Snorers on Chanel 5 a couple of weeks ago was actually very insightful. Lots of solutions that seemed to work. Have a watch if you can.

Channel 5, not Chanel! Lol.

Definitely get him to see a different gp!

My DH has a custom made mouth guard by a special list dentist. It's amazing. He used to grind his teeth, bump his teeth together, snore, puff puff puff, and more. Now he stores a little. Now he can't sleep without it as he wakes himself up!

His teeth grinding has caused so much damage to his teeth.

Well worth it - the mouth guard proper name is a mandible repositioning apparatus.