Massive row

[Meadow1203]

Just had a huge row with DP about cats, this may sound stupid and I really need to know if I am being unreasonable or is it him.
We have recently moved into my new house and in living in a very very small studio whilst we renovate the house. I have 2 cats who are very content and happy now. We were staying in his house before and tried to introduce his daughters cats (which she got a few years ago but now at Uni and said she can't have them) but it was a nightmare they had to be kept separated, terrible fighting. I have been trying to talk to DP about rehoming her cats and also asking her to decide what she wants to do, but this has fallen on deaf ears each time I mention it the subject is changed. So today I asked him what is happening and he said they are coming here, I am putting my foot as there is nowhere for them to stay and just cant stand the fighting, I love cats and don't think this is fair on any of them. Anyway he has said things like well I will just get them put down, or throw then out on the road, I see this as emotional blackmail. He is very angry with me and has called me controlling and being a bitch and does not want my cats here. This all sounds ridiculous and very unfair, Am prepared to be told I am wrong though. I feel like a horrible person now

No wonder! Poor soul. You have some tough choices ahead one way or another.

Do you have a pal you can go for coffee with n chat?

Or even just somewhere to get some space to yourself to think for a bit?

You need to rehome him and the cats. Maybe they could all go to his house.
His behaviour in general is unaceptable over the cats and his behaiour of throwing a tantrum, throwing things and slamming doors.
You are better off without all this.

I was reading the thread, very much on your side about the cat situation. Neither he or his DD have dealt with the issue in all the time you've been trying to get the situation sorted. Bloody annoying.

Then I saw He has now stormed off somewhere, hopefully to calm down as was very very angry with me. I get nervous when he starts throwing stuff and slamming doors so glad he has buggered of for a bit.

Of course you get nervous. Anyone would. This is a far bigger deal than the cats. DH hasn't thrown things or slammed doors in 17 years. It's not normal or acceptable behaviour.

Sounds like he's starting to show you things are going to be in future. He's going to tell you how things are and then back this up by tantrums and intimidation.

He may have unintentionally done you a favour by revealing his hand at the last possible minute. Consider it a very significant warning. Please don't move in with him.

I get nervous when he starts throwing stuff and slamming doors so glad he has buggered of for a bit

So this is something he's done before? Fuck that. He's got a filthy temper and you should NOT be living with it. This is not normal or appropriate and neither will it get any better. Think about how he'll behave when (and that's not if) something really does upset him.

Next time he says he'll get them put down call his bluff.

I'd rather have animals any day ask him to leave. X

I loathe cats - but your house, your decision. If they belong to his adult daughter, then they're her responsibility to care for/rehouse/put down.
Think I could happily live without a man like this, too.

Just seen the post about his violent temper. Think I'd have him put down! He's no loss - be a happy cat lady on your own!

He sounds abusive with the mocking you, throwing things and screaming. Don't let him move in. It will get worse once he does