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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Help me be strong tonight. Not letting him back.

40 replies

Strongerin2020 · 30/12/2019 22:12

We split and tried again.

I missed him.

It's been exactly the same

I feel alone. We do nothing. We go no where.
He drinks. Smokes weed.

Said at 3pm he was nipping out for an hour.

Get told by someone else at 8pm he's at his mates drinking.

He says he's coming home.

He's gone pub.

I've had enough.

I deserve better than this

He has his own place still but he won't go there.

I know he's gonna come here. Drunk. Banging on the door.

Please help me be strong.
I'm not letting him in.

I'm done.

2020 is my year. New life. New strength. New body.

A year for ME.

OP posts:
Comtesse · 30/12/2019 22:15

You can do it! Don’t waste your one precious life on losers!

CantstandmLMs · 30/12/2019 22:15

You know you're worth better and you are. You've got this. Tell him in no uncertain terms it is over! Thanks

MarianaMoatedGrange · 30/12/2019 22:16

Well done OP. He clearly won't change, so you'll have to. Look forward to 2020 as a drink sodden weedhead free time for you!

category12 · 30/12/2019 22:17

Sounds like a good decision. Flowers

RoxanneMonke · 30/12/2019 22:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Happierwithouthim · 30/12/2019 22:20

Stronger you can do this, you deserve to be happy not live like this

Dayzeez · 30/12/2019 22:21

I’m glad you have acknowledged that the person you are describing is no good for you

Start your new life now

You’re amazing

Original poster
Strongerin2020 · 30/12/2019 22:22

I love him so much but he's changed so much. He isn't the man I fell in love with.

I have to accept that. He can not change.

Or he doenst want to.

I'd rather be alone than feel alone :(

OP posts:
mummypigx · 30/12/2019 22:25

You can do this OP!

Do you have DC? Do it for them if nothing else Thanks

letsdolunch321 · 30/12/2019 22:28

He will come to yours bang on the door ..... then what will happen ?!?!

He will do the same thing the following night and so on.

OP get out of this sorry situation

Original poster
Strongerin2020 · 30/12/2019 22:30

He will either go away or I will call the police I guess.

OP posts:
Ladycoo1 · 30/12/2019 22:34

Life is no dress rehearsal. Move on. Good luck X

BumbleBeee69 · 30/12/2019 22:36

I guess

This reply doesn't inspire confidence OP.... be strong for your own sake.. Flowers

Original poster
Strongerin2020 · 30/12/2019 22:38

I don't need to inspire confidence in you. I have it in myself. It's a turn of phrase.

OP posts:
LadyLightning · 30/12/2019 22:38

Good for you - close the door, dont let him in, he doesnt deserve you.

PrettyPurse · 30/12/2019 22:39

Have you told him not to come back?

user1497997754 · 30/12/2019 22:46

Lock the doir from the inside and make sure windows are locked.....call the police if he causes trouble....you deserve much better

letsdolunch321 · 30/12/2019 22:52

Stronger ..... call the police if needed.

Get this twat out of your life for your own sake.

Butterymuffin · 30/12/2019 23:00

You're making the right decision OP. Lock the house up securely. He doesn't have keys, does he? Definitely ring the police if he makes trouble.

Original poster
Strongerin2020 · 30/12/2019 23:14

I think he has keys. But I can leave my keys in and the chain on so he can't get in

OP posts:
HappyintheHills · 30/12/2019 23:18

Yes lock the door, key in, chain on - and send a message telling him not to come round. Then call the police if there’s trouble.

Walkacrossthesand · 30/12/2019 23:19

As prettypurse says - if he usually lives at your place, and is expecting to come back there tonight, best message him to say you don't want him there tonight so he must head someplace else after his night out. Then lock up, chain on door, police on speed dial. Good luck

MarianaMoatedGrange · 30/12/2019 23:25

Change your locks ASAP too.

Original poster
Strongerin2020 · 31/12/2019 00:00

I've told him several times but he never listens.

OP posts:
ohwheniknow · 31/12/2019 00:03

When will you be changing the locks?

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