How to ask out a practical stranger? Bad idea?

[JukeboxRomeo]

I have namechanged for this. I'm almost mortified about posting it and I don't know if this is even the right place.
Basically, in a nutshell, how on earth do you know if a guy likes you and how do you ask them out? Without causing extreme embarrassment if it goes tits up.
Back story goes there is a place that I frequent (not hugely often but have been there twice in the last two months) where said guy works on the front desk. I fancy the pants of him. I can't really explain why, I wouldn't say he is particularly attractive but there is just something about him that is driving me mad. I have this mad inkling he might feel the same (I could be wrong, hence the not making a fool of myself bit) and I am aware that I don't really know him but there is just this really strong tension that I have never felt before whenever I am in his presence. I nearly give him a christmas card with my number in last week but chickened out at the last minute. I'm kind of kicking myself.
So how do I go about this? Is it a stupid idea to persue this in the first place? Has anyone here ever asked out a semi stranger? Did it go well? I would really like to be able to visit this business again so I'm wary of it going wrong. Very wrong, but something in my gut is telling me to do something. I think I'll regret it if I don't.

I am going to do it but I have to actually go there which I'm not doing until I have an appointment and I'm definately not going there on a Saturday when it will be packed!
I will update as well when I've done it even if it is a big fat no.

I was thinking tattoo shop as well! Get his name tattooed on you somewhere obvious? Forehead? He'll know then!

You told his boss you were married!
He might have mentioned something about you being cute and his boss said, "she's married" so now he's kept away.
Could you message him if you've found him on fb? Chances are if he's not interested he just won't reply and then you'll both forget about it.

I was still with ex husband at the time though and made it clear to the boss that I was married as I suspected he sensed something

Well that probably explains the change in this guys behaviour... his boss has told him that you're married!

I couldn't cope with all this waiting, it'd drive me mad.

Another one who thought tattoo shop straight away! Op you’re going to drive yourself crazy if you don’t get this out of your system ( as well as us lot haha ) but seriously can you honestly wait until the end of the month?
Im impulsive so would have to do it. If it is indeed a tattoo shop then you can say something along the lines of “ yes I’m getting a new tattoo after finalising my divorce, fresh start and all that “ ( or similar ) which makes it very clear that you’re not in a current happy marriage.

If it’s a tattoo shop then you must have lots of them the amount of times you seem to go in!

Although I don’t know any tattoo shops with a reception area?

Yep tat shop in whicb case asking you out isnt sackable.

I'm neither confirming or denying it's a tattoo shop. If it is I may have left it out as the general mumsnet consensus is that tattoos are abhorrent and anybody with one should be burned at the stake.
Does that mean you think I shouldn't go for it Coughy? I'm going to anyway but I feel like I should keep in mind that it could well not go to plan. I also didn't make the link between the whole being married thing.
This is so outing if anybody who works there reads this.

Shit. I just accidentally clicked on his instagram story.
Can he see that I clicked it? I've never posted a story before so I don't have the foggiest.

I’m sorry to say but I think on IG you can tell who has looked at your story!

Yeah he’ll be able to see that you saw his IG story.

Well you have to ask him out now! Do it on IG and make sure you have your best pics up!

Shamelessly following because I’m a hopeless romantic (and also a single mum who hopes that a guy I like who doesn’t have kids will still be interested in me!)

I'm in the same boat guy at work I've liked for ages I'm sure likes me too but hasn't asked me out so I'm gonna have to ask him...I'm not sure how I'm gonna do it yet, as I am not one for asking men out!

@Treesinthewind same as you Trees

Stop fucking about, you will dinn out of space for new tattoos before you've asked him out!

Add him on Instagram NOW (make sure your profile pic is clearly you and bloody well message him and all him out and DONT YOU DARE OVERTHINK IT.

"Hi X good to connect! We always have a laugh when I come into the shop, I was wondering if you'd like to go for a coffee sometime? "

GO. DO NOT THINK ANY MORE. JUST BLOODY WELL HOLD YOUR BREATH AND DO IT.

Ladies... you know they call people fools in love, songs are always calling people fools and talking about love and fancying in the same sentence.

We have to take a risk to look like a fool every now and again. We just do. That's the only way to the gold.

I really would like to point out that I'm not getting tattoos to see this guy. I've been getting tattooed semi regularly for 10 years and I've only been going to this shop for around 18 months. Tattoo's and tattoo conventions and travelling to get work done by different artists is actually my hobby and I have a few tattoos currently booked that are not all at this shop. Sorry! I really need to point that out before everybody thinks I'm a crazy lunatic who is permanently marking her body in order to see a guy she fancies even if he doesn't seem to remember my name.
But yes! I will do it and thank you everyone for all the advice. I feel like I owe it to you all to get on with it now.

There is a way to stop someone seeing you have seen their insta stories. I mean 3 hours later is possibly not helpful, but if you block him until that story is gone, so 24 hours, he can't see that you saw it. Had to frantically Google that one day when my bordem stalking took me too far!

Also, just do it!

Hi OP, did you add him on instagram? Dying for an update 😀

mia Nooo, however I did bring my appointment forward so it's now on Friday. I don't know how to do it. Do I just hand him my number? Do I leave it on the desk when he is not looking and then run away? Do I ask him if he is single and then what..? Help me. I've never done this before.
Also I have the fear. If he is as single as I think he might be, you know so single that his family members have been putting up on social media that he's still single. If he rejects me it must be because he thinks I'm ugly. I know this is ridiculous but I have very little confidence in this regard after the entirety of my school life being bullied for being 'ugly'. That stays with you. Sorry I'm rambling now.

If you are too shy to ask him outright, Just write your number down, give it to him when you leave.

Hey this is my number xxxx call me if you fancy a drink sometime

And then you wait. Make sure you write the number down correctly 😂

Write number down correctly - got it!
I once messed that bit up . I went for a job interview where I was so sure I had got it. The interviewer even took me around to meet the other members of staff and told me to expect a phone call. Got home, no phone call. In the end I looked at the bit of paper I had copied the phone number I gave to them off to discover two of the digits were wrong.
Oh shit. I'm really going to do this.

If he does say no, it could be for many reasons. Maybe he’s pining over someone else, maybe he’s happy being single, maybe he’s had a bad relationship and is working on himself and wants to stay single for now, maybe he’s planning a round the world year-long trip.. good luck!

I'm in the same boat there's a guy I feel like I need to ask out and I haven't got a clue how to do it as I never ask men out! Let us know what you say and what he says! Good luck!