Gonorrhoea

[Jennyie]

Hello,

I’m at my wits end. For the last 6 weeks I have experienced an increase in vaginal discharge, towards the latter stage it changed colour slightly - to a pale green.

Two weeks previous to this, after sexual intercourse with my Husband he experienced some dryness, uncomfortable red skin at the end of his penis (at the time we put it down to vaginal dryness after my period) He went to the sexual health clinic, but by the time his appointment came round it had cleared up and he wasn’t tested for anything.

One week later I went to the clinic, was tested, immediate results diagnosed gonorrhoea. Was treated. He was then tested and treated the same day, assuming any sexual partners would have contracted it too.

We have a completely monogamus relationship.

He has received a text message 4 days after his test to say all his results are negative.

I’m back at the clinic in 3 weeks to test again.

Not sure whether it’s worth mentioning that the clinic also looked for the ‘threads’ on my coil, Dr couldn’t find the coil. This is the second time it’s got ‘lost’
He’s having the snip this time...

He had gonorrhoea 30 years ago and was treated, have asked whether it lies dormant for that long and answer is unlikely.

Anyway, so, I guess my simple question is - how else is gonorrhoea contracted apart from sexual intercourse/oral sex/vaginal birth?

Apart from my immediate test results being wrong I’m not coming up with anything.

We left the country the day after the tests/treatment so I can’t really go to my GP etc. I’m back at the clinic the day after we get back. Just having to sit it out. Tearing my hair out.

Thanks for reading until the end 🥴

Any advice/ideas?

Best Wishes
Jennyie

The only way he hasn't cheated is if you live alone on a desert island

""He went to the sexual health clinic, but by the time his appointment came round it had cleared up and he wasn’t tested for anything.""

Sorry OP, he is lying. He got treated at this time.

They are called SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED infections.

I’m back, patchy WiFi here in the Far East.

Thank you to those who have offered constructive and respectful advice/replies.

12 hours after my Husband’s text from MMG I received the same text. My original test results are negative.

Make of that what you will.

Cheers!

Weird thread

The ‘immediate results’ are based on looking at the discharge down a microscope. While this is highly accurate up to about 2% of people have meningococcus in genital discharge. It looks the same as gonococcus. This does not cause any harm in the genitals and is not sexually transmitted. That is why the microscopy results should be confirmed by culture (growing the bug in laboratory) or a DNA test method.

Far East.....I heard of someone who unluckily caught an untreatable strain of gonorrhoea in Thailand.

I am glad your swabs came back all clear OP. That is good news.
Some facilities won’t have access to a high tech microscopic testing device and will likely treat you based on your symptoms alone. They treated the worse case scenario which in this case turned out to be a false alarm.

@creamcheesetriangle

Can I please ask - would you normally test for BV and STIs as well if a patient presented with symptoms?

Last time I was checked I had symptoms (increasing vaginal pain) and the swabs were checked within an hour - I was told there were no signs of chlamydia or gonnorhea but I did have BV.

@creamcheesetriangle thanks for the info on symptoms of untreated dormant gonorrhoea, which was the only thing I could think of if no cheating had gone on.

Also, good explanation from @coffeecool, showing that any quick tests should be followed up by lab tests

Oh no OP :(

Sounds like he was tested and treated on his first visit, then retested after you'd gone to the clinic, and got a negative result. I'm really sorry but he has been unfaithful

Initial testing is by near patient microscopy - you can get both false positives and negatives. Tests sent away are for DNA from gonorrhoea and are very accurate. It sounds as though you were unfortunately falsely diagnosed and treated initially if your subsequent results are negative.

I would go speak privately to your doctor about it and then if needed to your DH.
Dont listen to people on here, as their first response is that 'he is a cheater' no matter what the situation.

Has he questioned you about cheating? If he really was innocent he would surely be wondering why you had it and he didn't? I'm sorry OP but he seems guilty to me.

Anyway, so, I guess my simple question is - how else is gonorrhoea contracted apart from sexual intercourse/oral sex/vaginal birth?

If your latest post is accurate then the question is irrelevant if NEITHER of you have been diagnosed with Gonorrhoea.. so why have you bothered to asked it ?

An hour after I tested positive we had the did I cheat/he cheat talk.

Neither of us has cheated, how else do you want me to answer that question, for those who have asked?

Bumblebee - I WAS initially diagnosed with gonorrhoea.

Thank you theworstwife and coffeecool for the information.

@Jennyie you told us you had gonorrhoea so we judged based on that. Posters who are still saying he cheated haven't read your update. If you don't want us to tell you your husband has cheated don't tell us you have an unexplained STD.

Glad you don't have it and nobody has cheated.

@EvenMoreFuriousVexation

Woman with symptoms - initial testing for candida (thrush), BV, trichomoniasis, chlamydia and gonorrhoea (these are swabs from the vulva/vagina and cervix), HIV and syphilis (blood test).

Glad that OP's situation seems to have been resolved (though this is a really typical history for a woman to find out about her husband's affair, unfortunately. And I'm still not sure why he wasn't tested initially?)

We are both unsure why he wasn’t tested initially too. We are both going to pursue that, together, at my appointment in a couple of weeks with the same Dr we both saw separately.

I'm glad your results are both clear - so did they offer an explanation to both of your symptoms then?

Also, I don't believe all men cheat, just as I don't believe all women cheat, however, your partner telling you they haven't cheated does not mean they haven't cheated. I never in a million years thought my husband would cheat on me but guess what...

yes it all seems rather messy and could have caused dreadful consequences, within any marriage. I don't know if you've perhaps misunderstood or jumped the gun on this occasion, but these clinics are very good at explaining and informing clients. Either way I'm glad you're confident in your relationship and all is well.

None of this adds up, Gonorrhoea doesn't arrive from nowhere.
in the scenario of you being diagnosed with it, he surely should assume you have cheated. but seemingly hasn't, because he has
He has already been treated. (you said so in 1st post)

I would put in a complaint about that. The member of staff needs retaining at looking at the slides. They owe you an apology because getting this result can tear a relationship apart if it's wrong. They should be absolutely sure it's there before they report it. I would trust the negative result of your urine/swab they took and sent to the lab.

So is Gonorrhoea incorrectly diagnosed on a regular basis? How strange.

OP
I’m unsure of what you mean. The original post from you stated the doctor diagnosed you with gonorrhoea.

Now your back-tracking and saying original testing says you didn’t have anything

Are you telling porkies because you truely believe your partner has been faithful ?

Either way, when you both had the talk and he said he hadent cheated - well ya, sorry why on earth would he tell you ?

If his had the nerve to get it and get tested then of course his not going to tell you he had it or even that he cheated and gave it to you.

One week later I went to the clinic, was tested, immediate results diagnosed gonorrhoea. Was treated. He was then tested and treated the same day

OP this is where the confusion lay.... you said this......

That was his question when he went in to be treated after me. His original notes say he ‘didn’t want to be tested’ and he’s disputed that.

So he WAS treated...

An hour after I tested positive we had the did I cheat/he cheat talk.

SO you were tested and found to be positive.... and were both treated as you tested Positive and he treated as a pre-caution ? but also had THAT convo...

I think this is why is all so very confusing for us too OP.