To ask my husband to move out

[Louise000000]

We are currently seperated and he is the sole earner. I've just spoken to wellfare office and they told me that I would be entitled to enough universal credit to cover me staying alone in our house with kids.
My husband's brother rents out a room in our house, ideally I would want them both to move out and get a place together.
Unreasonable?
The main reason for living as 'friends' for now was 1) I didn't know where I stood financially and 2) my dh is stopping an addiction to weed where he could potentially be vulnerable.
Having had a phycologist who has alot of experience in substance addiction tell me that staying with him is posing a risk to our children's future (they are learning from his behaviour etc) also that he has 20 years worth of supressed emotions to come out, my gut is telling me the best thing would be for him and his brother to move out in the new year.

I was told today that it is had another property I'd be expected to sell that buy if me and kids live here we aren't expected to sell it and would be entitled to just over £1000 a month
When my ds turns 5 there would be a condition for me to work more hours which I plan to anyway

If i had another property*

There is no guarantee the house will not have to be sold if you divorce, if it was it is likley you will receive the larger percentage of the equity as you are the resident parent and are currently not employed.

You could however apply for a Mesher order which could potentially defer the sale of the house for a specific length of time.

@fedup21 You can, but it's technically a loan www.understandinguniversalcredit.gov.uk/new-to-universal-credit/housing/

Go ahead and apply for UC but until you see a solicitor and apply to divorce and work out the financials, it is no given that you can stay in the house at all or that he will be required to continue paying for it.

The house would likely have to be sold in the event of a divorce as you can’t take on the mortgage in your own name as have no income and he will be restricted in getting his own place by remaining named on the mortgage. Judges like both parents to have a place for the children.

If he is working, it makes more sense for you to move out given you don’t plan to work.

I'm not wanting to move my kids. This is their home and they love this house.

I do think expect my husband to pay for the house at all, just to give me the 19% that he is entitled to?

If we apply for a divorce it's a 2 year process anyway is it not?

He earns good money and works away driving a truck so having us 4 move to a flat and him living in our 4 bed house makes no sense.

Don't expect *

You will probably have to sell. Friend in similar situation was made to sell as he couldn't buy without the equity and she couldn't get a mortgage with benefits. I would get legal advice and prepare for that possibility. Only anecdotal but amongst people I know both starting with a clean slate seems to be common these days.

I can see the good sense in him and his DB moving out. But I'm not certain that this will stack up for you financially.
Will he pay you child support?
Will he need to release equity from the house in order to get himself somewhere else?
Once the UC is reviewed (when your youngest reaches 5), how will you handle childcare?
I hope you find a way that this can work. It sounds as though things have been very difficult and your children (and you) deserve a settled life.

Divorce times are variable but its not necessarily a 2 year process.

For me it did take 2 years (acrimonious, no mediation and multiple court dates with a forced sale of property) but my friend was divorced within 12 months (it was acrimonious but she had mediation and bought her husband out of their marital home) another friend took 11 months (amicable diy divorce with 50/50 split of assets).

What is the 19% figure that you are referring to?

Child support for 3 kids is 19% of his wage x

I think it would be best to discuss things with your ex and see how he reacts to the idea of moving out. This will indicate whether you need to seek immediate legal advice or if for now you can sort thing out one step at a time. As you are no longer living as a married couple I would apply for UC straight away and inform tax crdits of the change in circumstances.

The fact you have mentioned that your ex has an addiction to weed (albeit he is trying to stop) and quite horrifyingly drives a HGV for a living would suggest that he has has a flagrent disregard for following legal and moral codes of conduct and may behave unpredictibly.

I really hope that everything works out positivly for you and your children.

@SunburstsOrMarbleHalls you are right! He's got 20 years of supressed emotions to come out too. Need to think about kids as a first priority.
Yes will try amicably as selling house and divorce seems like a long way away x