OP, you are in the eye of the storm so don't judge your emotions on how life is now. Fear is probadly your overwhelming emotion but over time certainty over your house, income etc will make you feel more secure.
I am further down the line and time really does heal but it takes time, 2-3 years is not unreasonable. That doesn't mean you won't be happy during that time but it just takes time to get to the "not bothered" stage. I think healing starts from when divorce and financials are all concluded, rather than physical separation date.
I had the most vindictive Ex H who shocked everyone by his aggressive actions to me. Financially he did well out of the divorce and he is now open about his relationship with OW but as my older DC tell me he is likely to be a lonely rich old man. His friends are superficial and in the event of illness he would have no one genuinely there.
Ex lied and schemed throughout the separation and tried to smear me but over time the truth has come out. It always does. Use his bullying to realise it's not you, it is his character and if he does this to the mother of his child then he will do this to anyone else he gets involved with.
Ex also has a glittering and well paid career (it is out there in the public so I can't avoid it) but behind the headlines is the reality he cancels seeing his DC to have that career.
Rather than Karma, there is definitely consequences to actions.
My advice is to always act within your values, trust your solicitor to get a good deal and even if he comes out financially on top know that your legacy will be based on your values.