While doing some cleaning and decluterring a few weeks ago in our home office, I recently found some condoms in a laptop bag my husband was using until late last year. There were three, hidden at the bottom of an inside pocket. They are not promotional stuff, just regular Durex. He had a vasectomy 5 years ago so really not useful for us in any way... I really was not looking for anything and just stumbled on them as I was getting ready to put this bag away.
We have been married for 16 years, 3 kids age between 15 and 9, known each other forever (we studied together). We have also lived all over the world, moving for his job, which made us really close (as we are far from family and friends). He was at some point travelling a lot for work and we have always had a lot of trust and freedom (e.g going on breaks with friends separately) Now he has a sedentary job, we commute together most of the time and I don’t see when or where he could cheat.
I have not said anything so far, as I don’t know what I expect from a discussion really. I don’t know if I want to know whether he had an affair or paid for sex. I know pretending I haven’t seen anything is not a solution. Why do you think am I so reluctant to bring this up? And so as not to drip feed, our sex life is good when it happens (which is not often enough, we both agree on that). And my husband is very fit and attractive (but I am not bad either!).