My lovely dad has died and now my ex is suggesting reconciliation!

[Isthisjustthegrieftalking]

Just that really. My lovely dad died very suddenly quite recently and the only person I really wanted for comfort was my ex. I remained strong and didn’t contact him, nor did I reply to his messages (which have been lovely and supportive).

I have been really struggling with my fathers passing and feel incredibly vulnerable so much I feel like I’d like to make another go of things. We have a young DC together and I feel that now more than ever it’s important that she has her family around her.

The relationship wasn’t without it’s problems and that’s probably putting it nicely but almost a year has passed and the thought of being a family again gives me hope for the future and lifts me from my depression having lost my dad.

I’m worried this is just the grief talking, that this might be a terrible idea and that I should hold off until I’ve processed my fathers death.

Has anyone had any experience with this kind of thing?

If your Dad were in the room with you right now, what would he want for you? My guess is that he lovingly supported you after your ex cheated? Would he want you going back to be hurt again?

I know that I wouldn’t want my daughter to be going anywhere near a man who had betrayed her and hurt her so badly! I bet you wouldn’t want your little one to go back into a toxic relationship because they were lonely after you died?

Honour what your Dad would want for you- put yourself first and ignore your ex- who quite frankly sounds manipulative!

All I will say is that I met someone around the time my brother died and threw myself into what turned out to be an abusive relationship.

I was so desperate to find some happiness that in hindsight I ignored a lot of red flags.

So tread carefully. But I can understand that need to just want someone to turn to.