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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

This really isn't right is it?

79 replies

Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 12:11

I guess I'm looking for a massive wake up call, to help me just end this once and for all.

Been seeing each other 3 years in a LDR, complicated as I have young children who I want to protect. I know he isn't married etc, lives with his parents. These are some of the behaviours which have me thinking I should walk away but i have no idea what is stopping me.

Often cancels meeting at the last minute, when I have arranged childcare etc...
Drinks every day, heavier than most
Texts obsessively sometimes but then not at all on others
Lies about things he is doing and forgets the lies
Borrows money, but then excessively spends occasionally too
We do have a lot of shared interests and he can make me feel wonderful

So as not to drip feed he is late 40s I am early 40s.
He has no car, lives with his parents and would like one day to move to me (allegedly).

After yet another let down I know that he is awful and I should walk away but I dont... I should value myself more but I feel paralysed.

I guess I just want it pointing out as bluntly as possible how terrible this is.

OP posts:
Jaffacakesaremyfave · 04/07/2019 19:08

OP, I'm going to explain exactly why I think he's a narc and please pay very close attention to the motivations behind his actions. This reveals his true character and the way he thinks about himself and the world around him.

Often cancels meeting at the last minute, when I have arranged childcare etc...
Drinks every day, heavier than most
Texts obsessively sometimes but then not at all on others

1.Lies about things he is doing and forgets the lies. All narcissists are prolific liars. They will lie about anything and everything and his motivation is to keep you buying in to the false image (the mask) he is showing you. I genuinely wouldnt believe a word that comes out of his mouth. Your whole relationship with this man is built on what he wants you to see and you dont really know him at all (scary!)

  1. Borrows money, but then excessively spends occasionally too. All narcs are entitled. He believes the world owes him because he has a huge inflated ego. That is also why he spends on himself excessively because he thinks 'he's worth it' and you're not. I bet he never pays you back or at least makes you ask for the money back instead of offering it. I doubt he spends the money you give him on what he says he needs it for. It is very likely funding his other narcissistic supply/ies (all narcs cheat).

3.We do have a lot of shared interests and he can make me feel wonderful. This isn't even a positive because everything he tells you is to make you buy into the false image so that you stay in the relationship and he continues to get supply from you (money, sex, ego boost). Not one iota of his being cares about you, he lacks emapthy and is incapable of having a reciprocal loving relationship with anyone. I bet there are also the put downs disguised as jokes etc when he is devaluing you.

  1. He has no car, lives with his parents and would like one day to move to me (allegedly). Again this comes back to his entitlement and irresponsibility (all narcs are tragically irresponsible with money, commitments work etc.) He feels he is above working and is quite happy to freeload off his parents without a care in the world. He is lining you up to be the next person he free loads off (please do not fall for it)
  1. He stands you up or flakes out. The fact that you are long distance makes me think you are not his primary source of supply. I can almost guarantee when he flakes he is with his other woman (he probably has several) and winning and dining them with the money you lend him so they also fall for his bullshit.
  1. He is an alcoholic. Nearly all narcs are dependent on something (alcohol, drugs, sex etc). Deep down inside he actually has no self esteem and loathes himself although he is not able to really access and process those feelings so he hides behind alcohol and projecting all of his problems onto other people (again he cannot be held responsible for his actions) and relies on everyone around him to inflate his false ego.

Because you dont live together, I guarantee you do not know the true nature of this man and you do not know what he is capable of. Narcissists are truly vindictive and will punish you if you cross them. You only know the side of him he present to you.

If that's not enough to put you off for good, please don't think your children are not affected by this relationship (even if they never meet him). He is slowly destroying your sense of self worth and with that, he is taking pieces of you away bit by bit. This will affect your ability to parent, your DC will know you are unhappy and they will very likely grow up to model your codependent behaviours and end up with abusive partners too

I had 3 narc relationships in the space of 2 years and I have seen their wrath first hand.

Narc 1 stalked me for 6 months after I ended our short relationship and then tried to frame me for extortion to the police. Hes awaiting charge

Narc 2 harassed me for several months and tried to get me fired from my job by emailing lies about me to my employer. He was charged but failed to turn up in court and there is currently a warrant out for his arrest

Narc 3 stole £3000 and I have had to spend 100s trying to recover my money through the civil courts. He will never pay me back

Please dont think your narc is any different. They all have scarily similar patterns of behaviour and all my exes showed every trait I have listed for you above.

I learned the hard way how dangerous being a codependent is because you are so vulnerable to being abused without even realising.

Please completely cut contact with this man, block him and never look back. You then can start healing from your codependency which when you do, you will be so repulsed by what you've put up with

Jaffacakesaremyfave · 04/07/2019 19:21

P.s I second everything @rosabug said. Excellent advice!!

FermatsTheorem · 04/07/2019 19:26

Thank you all. When I say alone, I genuinely mean with no one ever just saying hi outside of work...

Here's what I did when DS was small, and I was all on my own.

I invited people over every single weekend for two or three months. Friend from nursery for play date. Couple from work I quite liked. Different friend from nursery. Arranged Sunday lunch in a pub with group of workmates. (Seeing how you're prepared to pay babysitters for nights out with this loser) evening down the pub with women from work... Rinse and repeat.

Some people it didn't "take" with. Other people we got to the solid "arrange something every three or four months" level. Some our kids really hit it off and play dates became regular. One fellow single mum became one of my closest friends, to the extent where we've been on several holidays together (brilliant - we have adult company, kids have someone to play with).

Being a single parent is hard, and you have to go the extra mile to get a social life, but it can be done.

Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 19:40

@jaffacakesaremyfave that is really powerful thank you for taking the time.

I needed to see all of this. I just need to take the leap and cut contact. I knew this. I needed to be told how stupid I am. I'm closer to doing it.... I keep thinking just one more chance wait until the heartache of the next let down... there is bound to be one. But I shouldn't wait.

OP posts:
Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 19:42

@FermatsTheorem that sounds good. I guess I just expect people to not want to hang around with me... I suppose taking the leap is either going to confirm it or I may just be shocked

OP posts:
Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 19:43

@ThatLibraryMiss he is an alcoholic isn't he? I'm not imagining it.... I just don't seem to know what is normal anymore

OP posts:
IncrediblySadToo · 04/07/2019 19:45

You have two young children - Do you want a nearing 50 yo alcoholic child as well?

IncrediblySadToo · 04/07/2019 19:47

Youve been a good Mum to keep your DC out of this... do yo u actually really want To turn into a super SHIT mum letting this waste of space move into their home? Seriously?!

jelly79 · 04/07/2019 19:48

Oh you know he is not stable or good for you or your kids and you stay? It's easier to be 'alone' than to feel insecure and anxious by the bits of him he may give you. After 3 years you should be excited about a future together not looking for people to reassure you to walk away.

Sounds like you have had a hard time so treat this now as you deserve to be truly happy and not settle for this rubbish! You are worth so much more than an inconsistent drunk who is dependent on his parents!

Good luck ❤️

supercali77 · 04/07/2019 19:50

Christ, high fiving a million angels for @rosabug and @Jaffacakesaremyfave replies. Amazing advice laid out well.

mummmy2017 · 04/07/2019 19:53

Your romances in your head, what you wish you had, please don't waste this summer on a man not worthy of the lovely lady you are.....

incrediblySadToo · 04/07/2019 19:58

That felt harsh but you did ask for help to get yourself sorted!

I’m not sure what’s led you to a place in your life where you have no friends and expect other people to not want to spend time with you ?! But tbh I think you sound nice and if you live near me we can go out for s drink/coffee/meal (I’m near Reading in the SE)

There are lots of groups organising real life meet-ups online (not necessarily dating ones, but there are those too obviously) try joining in
With a couple of those too

Do what a PP suggested and be the one to invite people over, arrange meet ups coffee/movie/dinner you’ll work
Out who is a potential friend and who you just don’t ‘gel’ With

It’s not easy but it’s do-able if you actually want to make new friends

Any old friends you’d like to reconnect with?

Don’t be so hard on yourself you really do sound nice, not stupid or boring (well not stupid APART from hanging onto this loser!)🤣

ThatLibraryMiss · 04/07/2019 20:03

he is an alcoholic isn't he?

I'm sorry, love, he is. Only he can sort it, and I think he's got further to fall before he hits the rock bottom that most addicts have to hit before they realise they need to give up their addiction or die. All you'd do by staying around is put that moment off. You can't stop it. If anything, by leaving him you'll bring it forward, and that would mean less damage to his liver and his life.

ChristmasFluff · 04/07/2019 20:28

Yay!!! You have a potential cocklodger on your hands - lucky you!!

Your children are not a complicating factor, they are the only things standing between you and catastrophe.

Do the right thing as a mother and walk away to protect your children from this alcoholic no-mark waste of space.

Sp1nningAr0und58 · 04/07/2019 20:31

Your best friend should be yourself first

Find things that you enjoy by yourself. These are sometimes the simple things like; a good sleep, read a book, listen to music, food, nature, exercise, have some down time, laugh, cry...

Then everything on top should be a postive bonus like work, friends, join groups, volunteer, charity etc

Your male friend is a negative

You don't need him

You are not alone, you have children

rosabug · 04/07/2019 20:31

I personally don't go in for the peusdo-psycho-labels. A person can be a waste of space and bad news without being a 'narc'. None of his behaviour may be consciously deliberate - It's just the way he is. He's a damaged loser and you, nor anyone, can help or change him.

Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 20:31

@IncrediblySadToo I am needing harsh.

Everyone thank you... I dont think that I am "there" yet but realise I am not going crazy here.

Strangely. Hearing how awful I am being staying is actually making me feel happier than I did when i first posted. Getting it down bluntly helps too...

I can feel change coming. Maybe it won't be bleak. Maybe I can be happy (I'm not saying i am never happy, my children delight me)... but happy about something for just me one day.

I need to stop responding to him. I have to do it.
I am not quite sure I am strong enough but I do feel a lot stronger now that when I was thinking about posting.

And I dont want to be a shit mum and put my children through anything. They have to come first. They always will. I guess if he had met them it would be easier to end...because I dont want them exposed to his behaviour. So there is no future... there is no way forward here ever.

Sorry for the brain splurge I am trying to work it all through in my head.

OP posts:
Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 20:32

@IncrediblySadToo I am in the Midlands...

OP posts:
Lemonlady22 · 04/07/2019 20:45

Do you know that you can be lonely even if you are in a relationship...far better to be alone totally than with someone who makes you feel alone because they are awful to you

Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 20:59

Thanks @Lemonlady22 I am realising that some of the loneliness comes from investing too much in time with him and not people who may want to spend time with me closer. I guess in that way I've spent a long time isolating myself, haven't I?

OP posts:
ThatLibraryMiss · 04/07/2019 21:02

I need to stop responding to him

How about taking control into your own hands? Tell him the relationship isn't giving you what you need and you're ending it. Don't get drawn into explanations because he'll try to justify and you'll end up doubting yourself. Just This Is The End, arrange a mutual exchange of belongings if either of you have stuff that belongs to the other, all the best for the future, bye.

Then, block his number/email address, open your windows, rage-clean your house and book a few days away with your kids.

It'll be hard, I know. But in six months time you'll have saved yourself so much anguish you'll wonder why you didn't do it earlier.

Wakemeupnowplease · 04/07/2019 23:23

So I haven't made the leap but he did send a message which quite frankly I didnt believe. So I just replied simply "not true" and haven't looked since... baby step but one which is better than nothing... going to keep rereading this until I get braver

OP posts:
jelly79 · 11/07/2019 20:45

@Wakemeupnowplease how are you getting on...?

RonnieScotts · 11/07/2019 20:58

I haven't read the full thread (only the OP)

In his 40's living with his parents?

Run for the hills, this man is not a catch.

Wakemeupnowplease · 12/07/2019 14:20

@jelly79 thanks for the message. So I haven't seen him. I haven't blocked him yet, I'm still getting my head into that space. But I can see more clearly now. He is growing increasingly more "trappy" with his messages telling me he loves me etc ... trying to arrange to see me. I'm avoiding answering any of that and think I will be blocking soon

OP posts: