Competition for the worst in-laws. Do I win???

[BubbleBubble]

In a nutshell - relationship with my in-laws was fine until dh and I got engaged 6 years ago. Overnight MIL became frosty. MIL tried to take over the wedding arrangements. When things didn't go her way she got the hump and said she wasn't coming - no word for three months. She tried to turn dh against me during the wedding preparations. She made her own wedding plans (like a birthday cake - and all the guests had to sing happy birthday to her oldest son at our wedding dinner!??) No-one saw that one coming. My BIL was acutely embarrassed too. MIL sent a foul letter to my mother (who paid for the whole wedding) whilst we were on honeymoon. It was a 21 point letter of all the things that were wrong with the wedding. MIL sent letters to my bridesmaids complaining of the wedding, also whilst we were on honeymoon. She told dh that she had evidence that I was scheming against her (which I wasn't - just holding my own)

dh wouldn't apologies for marrying me and until he does she wants nothing to do with him.
That was 5 years ago. We have two gorgeous sons MIL/FIL (FIL completely under the thumb) have never ever seen them despite numerous invites. dh rang her up the day ds1 was born and her response "..you've only done this to spite me and rub my nose in it..!" (phone down).

dh has told me that the only way she will EVER agree to see him again is if he tells her we are divorcing. He has given up on them. She was DETERMINED to cast a shadow over our beautiful wedding day, come hell or high water. And do you know what? In a way she did - as it's the last time either dh or I saw them.

Do I win?

message withdrawn

... oh yes.... I have the most wonderful dh I think he had a difficut childhood with him Mum and when he was old enough to 'think for himself' he saw her in a different light. She has had a problem with every single one of his girlfriends.

BB,

I ran away to America to get married, and was never forgiven by the inlaws. The fact that they were in America at the time, and I found flights etc from them to attend made no difference.

They had to play victim, and obviously it was my fault, I made him marry me! (wish I hadn't, divorced now after he has numerous affairs).

They wouldn't even look at photos!

But still your story is better than mine

BubbleBubble - oh my goodness that is dreadful! Probably not what you want to hear but my in laws are wonderful so i can't join in this competetion but you do have my sympathies. You obviously have a very strong marriage to have survived such a bitter input from your MIL.

message withdrawn

PLEEEESE Just don't get me started .....
Yours sound horrendous - but quite frankly I think that I would appear on the Trisha show and still make the audience gasp.

Aren't horrid in-laws the worst in the world ??

I think that once you ( and I mean me here ) decide to stand your ground and no longer be brow beaten - then it's very liberating.

You sound like me ...... being LUCKY enough to have a DH loyal enough not to cow-tow to his mother - now THAT would be a nightmare !!

Keep going !!

Bubblebubble, they sound VILE! Here;s what mine are like:

MIL: bit of an I-Know-My-Son-Better-Than-You type. Divroced from philandering father, totally dependent on children for emotional support.

BIL 1: Gay, not quite out of closet (aged 37), bit "alternative" naturopath/homeopath type leanings since failed to finish medical school and now sells advertising space 9which he hates, but can't quite get round to doing anything about improving his life for himself)

BIL 2: Black sheep, drug problems in past, separated from his kids' mother, never had a proper job

SIL: Attractive but self-obsessed neurotic whose egocentricity is fuelled by her job (TV presenter). Will tell you everything about her life within 10 mins of meeting.

All of these people have taken handouts from DH for years - he's bailed them out of student loans, put them through college, paid their mortgages... so we were quite surprised when their response to us not inviting MIL to visit DD until the day after I got home from hospital was for SIL to call up ranting about how selfish we were, her mum was in bits, she was sick of the way we never thought of her, and that by the way SHE (SIL) would be "a far more successful mother than [lulupop] can ever be", and for BIL 1 to then send a 4 page letter detailing how DH was never like this in his first marriage (he met me 4 yrs after it ended), how I had never bonded properly with DS, was not a good mother, and DS's problems with athsma were to do with my imappropriately forcefeeding him solids too soon (@ 6 months, after BF!), and that DS was "developmentally backward and obese" (hmmm, on 90th centile and talks for England at aged 2). All this from a gay man who as far as we know has never even had a relationship, has no children of his own, failed medical school, but thinks he's qualified to comment on our marriage, parenting skills and children. Nice.

MIL was sent a copy of this letter but never commented, never came to see DD (as she was so put out at not being invited THE SECOND the cord was cut), and now rings up as if nothing ever happened.

No word from either BILs or SIL, not so much as a card saying congratulations on the birth of your beautiful daughter.

Couldn't care less as I think they're all beneath contempt, but feel so sorry for my DH who has only my family to lean on . It's his bithday tomorrow and I bet none of his ot even bother to send a card.

Baaaaaad!

My FIL told dh (over the phone) to 'have a nice day tomorrow' the day before dh started his chemotherapy. He phoned him 3 times in the year following dhs diagnosis.

FIL now has cancer himself and expects all the sympathy and support possible

Have told this before, but anyway.

Me and dp aren't married but but my MIL to be tried to punch me in the stomach when i was 8 weeks pregnant with Dd1 and had just miscarried a twin.

The reason.....I dared to answer her back whilst she was slagging me off to Dp.

We did actually still see her and FIL (under the thumb too) after that but had several run ins with them since and now don't see them at all.

Wow!

I know, lovely people, i don't think.

Think I've mis-read, nutty she tried to punch you whilst you were pg and had already miscarried a twin?!?!?!?

You win.

My mil makes me shudder at the thought of her, butwe have banned her from contacting us again.

Tis true honestly. I'm just thankful that dp managed to shove her out of the way else i might not have Dd1 either.

Wow!

Crystaltips - not enough information to judge, but a cow-towing dh would be worse than a crap MIL. Of that I have no doubt.
lulupop - OMG remarkably similar! Which channel SIL?
hmb - What? Sensitive soul.
nutcracker - completely off the scale!

I think I am not longer the firm favourite"

No my MIL stood up in court and lied (after swearing on a bible - not the god fearing cathiolic she made out to be then!!) about me trying to stop me having my daughter live with me.

SHe now still tells everyone she meets that she is not coping very well after everything I have put their son through and I have probably contributed to her early death with all the stress I have caused (heres hoping!!)

This is the woman who had a wake for her dog and hated me for not going when I was 8.5 months pregnant and had an allergic reaction from taking too many anti-histamines of all things!!

In fact good riddance to her - the sad old cow who dresses like a slapper, drinks like a fish and has lips like Dame Edna with too dark lipstick smeared all over them!!

Oh she also insists on using stupid words like Poopie (poo) to DD which I hate and sings to her whilst going round the supermarket

Nanny Nanny Nanny Loves you very Much
Nanny Nanny Nanny Loves you very Much

AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

Can you tell I hate her??

My new ones are lovely though

message withdrawn

bubblebubble - my SIL is freelance so on different channels - used to present Working Lunch on BBC2 though

funny how she manages to project image of together sharp business type but is in fact pathetic neurotic bunny boiler who requires psychotherapy every time a boyfriend dumps her (she tends to announce her engagement/pregnancy/both after about 4 months of going out with someone, but strangely enough she's still single)

Mil and Fil came to stay for 3 WEEKS when dd1 was born so that Mil could cook DH dinner every night. During the day did nothing but sit in the house talking about her birth experiences and fil used to give me their washing to do when I was doing the babies bits. When ds was born I insisted only a weekend visit was acceptable and when they were leaving she asked me to carry her suitcase down the stairs even though I still had stitches Lots of stories but am trying to be tranquil this afternoon so can't think about them If I think about it I'll have a row with dh when he comes home

I copied and pasted this after doing a search. my MIL isn't worth the energy it take to type it again, I posted it on 28th July.

Well, this could be my longest post EVER so I will try and keep it as short as possilbe by just giving you a few of her little gems.

My feeling for her have just got worse over the weeks since I posted that, it's DS3 1st bithday next week and I'll be gobsmaked if he gets a card from her. If he does it's going back 'return to sender'. She made no attempt to explain her behaviour (of ignoring the children) and hell would freeze over before she'd say sorry.

My blood boils just thinking about her. Hate is a strong word but it doesn't even scrap the surface of my feeling towards her.

Yikes, what a bitch. My father's mother said exactly the same to one of her sons, about not being the father etc. She never ever saw him again and died a lonely, bitter woman .

Can I join in - my MIL is a right bitch.

Her and FIL were unhappy for a long time and they eventually seperated a few years ago.

FIL admitted to the affair he had been having for 6 months, moved in with the woman and married her.

MIL had been having an affair for about 12+ years (bearing in mind my dh was only about 22 when they broke up) and everyone was well aware of her affair. (well almost everyone)

She denied it and used her husbands affair as grounds for the divorce. My dh (totally unaware of either affair) was gutted to say the least. He hated his father and refused to speak to him or his new wife.

Knowing about my MIL's affair I confronted her and insisted she told my dh as it was ruining his relastionship with his father.

Her response was "I'm not going to tell him. I want him to think it's his dad fault. I dare you to tell him"

So i did

She has never forgiven me (and don't I know it!!!) - luckily dh has

MIL: Thinks everyone owes her something, put all her kids in care so she could have a break. Thinks DH has a money tree and should give it to her.

BIL 1- Drug addict - lazy, expects everything for nothing

BIL2 - Lazy, thick, also xpects everything for nothing

BIL 3: has brains and uses them - very much like DH

BIL 4: annoying little sh*t, swears constantly, only 12, no one picks him up on it except me!

SIL: thick as pig poo

MIL is 70 % deaf so tends not to be interested in any conversation unless she has started it. FIL killed himself 9 years ago - was an alcohlic and wife beater.
In-laws are totally different to my family and behave like children!

MIL decided she wasnt coming to our wedding - in June- as we had gone to her sisters wedding when she hadnt been invited. She expected us not to go - whoops!

SIL got the hump coz i didnt ask her to be a bridesmaid - well actually i did, but 4 years previous and didnt mention it again as we very rarely saw her and we dont get on well.

BIL 1 decided he wasnt coming coz i hadnt invited his gf who we had never met oh and her dd.

BIL 2 got hump coz wasnt asked to be an Usher

BIL3 was an usher, because he is well presented and polite.

BIL4 : got the hump coz he wasnt a PAGE BOY!

Managed to convince MIL to come to wedding and at the rehearsal she said that all the BIL and SIL were gutted that they werent going! Luckily, knowing them so well i had already laid places for them knowing that they would come and that it was all an attention seeking/stirring stint.

Phoned all of them and said that i knew they would come and they were welcome if only for dh sake.

The amount of stress that family causes, and thats without his aunts and uncles causing a fuss because we had invited people they didnt like and therefore werent coming!

Wedding turned out to be brilliant - they were all slightly embarassed and behaved!

Then just as i think all is ok - we get a text message from the aunts - who didnt come to the wedding - whilst on honeymoon giving me a mouthful saying 'hope your fairytale wedding went to plan, its just a shame that it cost him his family!'

I could go on, but i think covers the jist of it.

I had awful problems with my ex-in-laws and reading all this makes me thankful they completely cut me and my sons out of their lives after I divorced (as opposed to sad that they lost contact with their extended family).