Competition for the worst in-laws. Do I win???

[BubbleBubble]

In a nutshell - relationship with my in-laws was fine until dh and I got engaged 6 years ago. Overnight MIL became frosty. MIL tried to take over the wedding arrangements. When things didn't go her way she got the hump and said she wasn't coming - no word for three months. She tried to turn dh against me during the wedding preparations. She made her own wedding plans (like a birthday cake - and all the guests had to sing happy birthday to her oldest son at our wedding dinner!??) No-one saw that one coming. My BIL was acutely embarrassed too. MIL sent a foul letter to my mother (who paid for the whole wedding) whilst we were on honeymoon. It was a 21 point letter of all the things that were wrong with the wedding. MIL sent letters to my bridesmaids complaining of the wedding, also whilst we were on honeymoon. She told dh that she had evidence that I was scheming against her (which I wasn't - just holding my own)

dh wouldn't apologies for marrying me and until he does she wants nothing to do with him.
That was 5 years ago. We have two gorgeous sons MIL/FIL (FIL completely under the thumb) have never ever seen them despite numerous invites. dh rang her up the day ds1 was born and her response "..you've only done this to spite me and rub my nose in it..!" (phone down).

dh has told me that the only way she will EVER agree to see him again is if he tells her we are divorcing. He has given up on them. She was DETERMINED to cast a shadow over our beautiful wedding day, come hell or high water. And do you know what? In a way she did - as it's the last time either dh or I saw them.

Do I win?

My DP's mother is a bit of a nightmare. I seem to go in and out of favour like it is going out of fashion! I've always realised that she can be poisionous if she wants to be (on first meeting she didn't have a good word to say about anybody!), but it wasn't until me and DP settled away together that she got really nasty about it all. Then when I brought her and xmas pressie, she liked me. Then I got pregnant and I was a scheming, manipulitive cow who was trying to trap her son (?). For a start we were planning to get a mortgage before, so I had no need to trap him. We have had to put the mortgage idea on hold as we don't have the money with the baby on the way. We are too young to have a baby and she wanted me to abort it.

The latest thing is that his 19yr old sister has announced she is pregnant. Now MIL is telling everyone that I'm pregnant and has actually started asking about me and the baby and talking about baby stuff excitedly! Suddenly we aren't quite so bad you see! I know it won't last. But I want her to know her grandchild. I know that my DP knows she is strange but he says she is his mum and he loves her, and as things are at the moment I couldn't ask for any more from him.

I don't think this would win any awards for nasitiest MIL by a long stretch but I think I might be in the qualifying for oddest potential MIL. I met her a few weeks after starting to date her son. He had warned me about him but I hadn't taken much notice. She was absolutely barmy! I went in to meet her and she got so excited! 'Ohhh, xxxx she's lovely, oh, isn't it wonderful, Ohh, xxxx I'm so pleased for you, she's lovely!' this went on for a long time. She would come into his bedroom and gaze fondly at us. I was 18, so was he. I think she thought we were planning to be together forever (not sure he thought much different TBH!) but I finished with him pretty soon afterwards...!

Sometimes (now that we never see or hear from her) I start to relent a little towards my MIL and feel the impulse to make a kind gesture in her direction. Will bookmark this thread to remind me what a dreadful idea that would be and how much better our lives have been since she gave up on us.

Bubblebubble, at least you don't have to see them. My MIL wasn't nearly so vile but domineering, spoilt, vain, narrow minded etc etc AND expected us to spend every other Sunday with her. I had to put a stop to that one eventually, it was killing us. No regard for my family at all and no concept of people being in any way different to her own experiences. I hate to say it but the typical cartoony Jewish mother in law and DH is the only son, the youngest and a big gap between him and his 2 sisters. She did have her good side though to be fair, I just didn't want to experience is every other week