Leaving tomorrow, need a hand hold please

[AboutToJumpShip]

Been in a psychologically abusive relationship over twenty years. Finally, with the help of my local crisis centre, social services and a very few good friends, I have found a flat. Husband is away overnight tomorrow, so my chance is here, but I’m panicking.

What are the most important things to take? I know I’m not going to be able to take everything that’s mine, but I want to get the vital things out.

And then what? I need to start to change addresses on everything. Need insurance on the flat (rented but I’ll need contents insurance.

I have to go out to work shortly, but my mind is all over the place. Any help would be massively appreciated.

You're a great mum op and I wish you the best of luck.

When I was leaving my marriage and having a wobble I used to tell myself all the time just keep going my heart, just keep going.

Oh OP you are wonderful. You make me so proud. I hope it all goes smoothly today and wish you and your son (and pet?) every happiness.

I concur with the people who say do not tell your H face to face. Leave a letter? Perhaps those wonderful people who have advised and helped you can tell you how to do it safely.

Yes! You are an inspiration and my time will come!

Rooting for you op. Your first night will feel so liberating.
Your ds will be more than fine.
Well done, you got this op.
Stay strong.

Well done you and good luck 💐🍾

Oh how brave OP!!

I hope you have a wonderful new life together, you and DS. This is a new beginning!

Sending you lots of luck and strength . And unMumsnetty hugs xxx

Well done. This is a big step that lots of people never manage.

I was going to add favourite mug and phone charger.

If 'he' has always paid for your phone you cannot be sure what trackers he has placed on it. I would at least get a new SIM card with a new number and contract.

If you can possibly afford it, a new cheap handset and SIM card for you and DS. Transfer your contacts the old fashioned way by typing them in again

Reset the old phone and leave it behind.

All the best

Gosh, well done! Hope it goes ok today

Thank you so much for all the good wishes.

I will take your advice and send him an e-mail. I was still thinking I owed it to him to tell him in person. I need to stop thinking that way.

Phone charger is something I could easily forget, thanks.

The school know already. They’ve been very supportive.

TheWorld, it has taken me a almost year from deciding I had to go. There were so many things to sort out. I won’t go into detail right now (he’s probably not reading, but he is aware I use Mumsnet) but it’s been really complicated. Hope you can work towards leaving too, even if it seems like it’s only a pipe dream right now.

Thanks again all.

Thinking of you this evening OP and wishing you all the best for your future. You're doing the right thing for you and your DS.

The very best of luck for you and your son in safe your new home. You are being very brave and I admire you greatly for what you are doing.x

Your safe new home x

To your new life op...

You probably have everything already, but there is a list of things to include in your safety packing list here:
www.womenshealth.gov/relationships-and-safety/domestic-violence/leaving-abusive-relationship

You’re doing so well, stay strong x

I hope you've had your first night safe and sound in your new spot lass.

Here's to the start of the rest of your life.

How are you doing op? How was ur first night? 💐💐

We didn’t manage everything last night. It got to eleven thirty and I didn’t think we should risk disturbing the new neighbours. So we had one last night in the old house and loaded all the rest of the stuff this morning.

I’m now at work. The car is still fully loaded, but we are out. I will go straight to the new flat after work.

Have to go now as my break is ending, but thought you’d appreciate an update!

Thank you for the update lass.

I know what you mean about running out of time. You've done very well. Home today to peace.

I am in awe of strong women such as your self. It is so difficult to change the status quo.
A big well done

Bloody well done!

Good luck in your new life OP, please come back when you can and let us know how you and your lad are getting on and of course us vipers are always here for support. Day or night there is always someone around

Brilliant update OP enjoyed your first night in your new home best of luck with your future

*enjoy

Well done

How is your first night in your new home?