Day 9 no contact - Struggling!

[Unlucky2015]

Hi everyone,
So I’ve made it to day 9 no contact, I’m quite proud as the longest we’ve ever had no contact for is literally 2 and half days.
But this morning was a struggle I burst into tears for about a hour. I was very emotional. I thought it would get easier as the no contact went on but it actually seems to be getting harder.
One good thing is though as upset as I was I didn’t cave. Now to keep myself busy for the rest of the day.. or try.
Looking for a hand hold x

I’ve done that off texts call logs etc and everything but still it comes up as ‘call name’ in the iPhone search. It’s annoying! I’m going to sea side with little one.
It’s been planned a while and he was meant to come for part of it, which saddens me about how life can take a sudden turn. But I’ll be fine. And ha ha be spontaneous and try one on!

Nothing wrong with looking like a chintz sofa! I have happy memories of chintz sofas...

Have a lovely time away- doing whatever you and your little one want.

Would it be helpful to frame it in your mind that you could contact him if you wanted/needed to? I'm wondering if the 'never' is making it harder for you. Of course you CAN contact him, but today you won't. Repeat as necessary.

I know that worked better for me, but understand if you need that psychological boundary.

I’ve never thought of thinking about it that way.. x

I have been through this. I wish I could be there to make you a cup of tea and take you for a walk on this lovely day. You have a little one! That's lovely. Remember that to them - you are their world. They love looking at you and being around you.

I am definitely going to try the floral look and push the exploding-sofa-effect out of my mind. AND I ate a whole Boursin thing with crackers last night and threw away the packaging evidence. Yeah, baby. I live dangerously and so can you.

That’s lovely thank you.
I’m half way through the day x it’s been a emotional one once again x

Nearly there again, OP. It's a beautiful evening here. Are you ready for your trip?

Well done OP you’re doing brilliantly! I’m debating going NC, current contact with my ex is taking its toll mentally on me. I find it hard to ignore and block him but fear this may be the only way else I think I’m in danger of messing everything up!

Enjoy the sunshine and celebrate the little things. I’m celebrating the lovely sun today, exercising for 2 hours and now a few drinks this evening. Baby steps.

Hi thank you for your replies every body.
Little one has just gone to bed and I’m quite tired myself.. I’m going to load the washer ready to put on first thing then start doing some packing.. I think I will be asleep by 10 tonight as I’m tired!
I’m not going till tomorrow afternoon so can finish off the packing tomorrow..
Day 10 is almost at a end.. i feel a sense of proudness? It sounds stupid but longest I’ve lasted no contact before with him was 2 and half days! 😭 x x

Crying

Let it out. Cry hard and completely. Get it all out.

Then remember that this gut wrenching pain you feel will pass. It will pass sooner or later. You will not feel like this always. Xx

I don't know the background here but from experience the bit where you think you can't take it is usually the 'eve' of the bit where you realise you can and have been getting through it.

When you get through tonight, you can feel even prouder. And after your long weekend away you'll have done Wait for it..... 14 days. Two whole weeks.

Thank you everyone.
Your support means a lot.
Now on day number 11 of nc

Morning
Just wanted to say I did the NC this time last year
Was the hardest thing ever ! I remember the pain so so well
Anyway, I got through it
So just wanted to let you know there is light at the end of the tunnel
My ex made me so low and I'm so happy now (well my last thread would say otherwise - but I WILL be ok again ) xx

Always remember that while you are going through the mental torture, he won’t be.

I’ve been there too. Thing that helped me was imagining me messaging, it popping up on his lock screen, and him thinking ‘I knew she’d cave first’

It seems to becoming more hard the more time goes on. It’s emotionally draining. I feel so sad.
I suppose they say things get bad before they get better..
Going away at 3PM today until Monday.. x

Hope you have a good weekend.

Thank you I just feel really upset today x

Remember we are all thinking of you and rooting for you. You are not alone in this. Big hand hold.

I can’t stop crying.
I’m so tempted just to ‘accidentally call’ to see if he’s blocked my number or what not.
I’m so pathetic and feel so weak
😭

You are bound to have moments of weakness, but you are overall strong. He is not worth your time nor your tears. Great idea by PP - imagine his gloating face if you give in to temptation. Don't do it Unlucky. Maybe give yourself permission to make contact on Day 30, if you feel you need to. Until then, write everything down, so you will be able to look back and see how much stronger you are becoming.

Thank you that’s a great idea.. I’m just trying so hard to not break it because then I know I will be angry and upset with myself and regret it and back to square 1. Xx

Just think how far you’ve done in breaking the circle. You don’t want to go back to square 1 and having to face all this pain again - that makes the last 11 days of pain pointless!

It will get better. Keep reminding yourself of that. Find something to do to keep your hands busy. This weekend away, think how your DC deserves you to be focused on them, not distracted pining for a man that does not care for you.