Ex has just threatened me and stolen a set of my house keys

[whatamess19]

STBXDH was dropping DS to my house this evening after having him after school. We try to keep things amicable.

We ended up having a blazing row and he pushed me into a corner and held a just boiled kettle over me. I managed to push past him and run out into the back garden and I heard the front door slam and his car drive off. I've just realised he's stolen a set of house keys from my french doors.

I want to call the police but SIL (who I called because we are very close) said it will antagonise him so don't.

I don't know what to do. He has form for being spiteful and I'm not happy going to bed knowing he can access my house.

op, you have done the right thing. Sounds terrifying.

Glad the police have been helpful.

Ignore your stupid sil.

Well done. When someone has no problems using those types of threats, they don’t tend to be terribly careful, and someone ‘accidentally’ drenching you in boiling water is going to still require the same amount of plastic surgery as if he ‘meant’ to do it. And I bet you’d never hear the end of the vixirim blaming crap either ‘she moved’ /‘she pushed my arm’ etc etc.

Never trust a man like this when he holds your life in his hands. He won’t be taking good care of Itzel ,

It, not the random spellcheck failure at the end there, sorry!

You need to consider contact. Is it court ordered?
Is your ds at risk?

So sorry you are going through this 💐

Thank you again everyone. The police were very lovely last night and took it really seriously. They have me some advice on applying for a non-molestation order and I believe they are going to try and retrieve the keys.

I feel really odd today. A bit tearful and anxious.

I'm not surprised, that must have been terrifying yesterday. You're probably in a bit of shock, so go easy on yourself today

Once you're feeling stronger, I think you need to pursue a non-mol order against him.

I would change your locks. Even if they get the keys back there is nothing to say he won't have made copies. Don't take any chances.

get the locks changed anyway.
just to be on the safe side. he had opportunity to get copies cut.

good luck

Can you go to DIY store and get a slide bolt or chain for inside of doors? Might make you feel more secure over the weekend.
Personally I would change the locks as well in case he copied the keys.

Oh bless you. You will feel wobbly today - the adrenaline which helped you to react, and post here, and call the police yesterday will now have gone. They should sell that stuff in bottles!!

If something awful happens again you will produce more adrenaline to help you to get through the emergency. In the meantime, the prescription is for a gentle day/nice easy meals/more crap telly, whilst you adjust to what happened.

Best of luck

And yy to changing the locks, just to give you peace of mind.

SIL is apparently used to pacifying abusers.

Holding a boiling kettle over you and threatening you and having your DS witness this cunt's violence is much more disturbing than potentially "antagonising" this jackass. He won't be so bad ass sitting in a gaol cell.

Glad you called the police and reported him. Please change your locks.

Change the locks. If the doors and french windows are uPVC and they are barrel locks then you can DIY it. Look on YouTube as there are loads of tutorials on there which will walk you through step-by-step what to do.

Glad they did something for you

Good for you. Pay no attention to SIL. Sounds like she's acting as his surrogate in this, because of course he doesn't want you to report him. It will make things worse - for him. Whereas now the police have his number, are after the keys he stole, and will rush to your aid should you need them.

He held a kettle of boiling water over your head. No wonder you're feeling weird this morning. You had a terrible experience, poor thing.

However he could easily have had a new set cut, so you're going to have the back door and French windows locks changed. Bloody nuisance.

God what a nutcase. So glad you got away. I'd absolutely change the locks and get cctv. I don't think I'd be doing handover at the house again either.

Your doing great.

Next you need to look at what options you have for changing the lock or adding other internal slide etc locks to the door he took the key for.

You won't feel safe (or actually be) until you have rectified his being able to get into the house.

Get all of your locks changed. Just becuase they can retrieve the keys, doesn't mean he hasn't already had them copied.

So glad you stood up for yourself.

Definitely get the locks changed.

Apply for a non molestation order on Monday. NCDV can assist

www.ncdv.org.uk/

Here is the application form

www.gov.uk/government/publications/form-fl401-application-for-a-non-molestation-order-occupation-order

Do a statement setting out exactly what happened. Include a paragraph saying you need an order without notice to him, because he will use any notice period to inflict further harm, and you will be too scared to proceed without immediate protection.

Call the court first thing Monday to check their procedures for emergency applications. Take 3 sets of the application and statement to court with you.

And no contact with your son for now.

I’ve not read entire thread so apologies if this is a repeat.....change the locks ASAP & never leave keys within his sight again. Do not let him come into the property again, ever.

Definitely follow @MrsBertBibby 's advice re non mol and contact OP. You did the right thing. I'm not surprised you feel shaken up.