OK in two minds whether to post this or not but here goes...
Me and DP had a huge row last night when he got in from work. He is an obsessional Virgo (!) and likes to come home to a spotless house. The house wasn't particularly messy, at least in my book, just a card to post to my mum on the table and something he had asked me to get him. There were a few things on the sofa next to me, and the kitchen spray was still on the kitchen side rather than the windowsill. Anyway he comes home and starts going off on one about the state of the house, how I have had some days off and why haven't I done the cleaning? Started doing his usual 'What is this doing here? Why is that there? Does this need to be here?' all shouted at me.
To cut a long story short I rose to it and ended up going nuts at him, tried to go away to the bedroom to calm down, where he came in and started at me again, cue more shouting etc. It it the worst row we have had for a long time.
He has gone out today and now I won't see him at all for the weekend as I am working and he has friends down. I think this was partly why he wanted the house to be sorted, but these are his friends, his arrangements why should I tidy up every time? He never does any cleaning, any of the washing (then complains he never has anything to wear), or cooking and I have to do pretty much all of the maintenance type things around the house because he just wouldn't ever bother to do it. I don't want to be the little woman at home who is responsible for all the household chores, at least when I am working full time as well as him.
My plan was that we could sort out the house together today. I've been off work sick and have hardly been feeling up to doing much. I'm six and a half months pregnant and I have to say this whole pregnancy malarky has knocked me for six. I'm always knackered and still trying to work full time doing 12 and a half hour shifts (nights as well) in a very physical and mentally demanding job. I also worry about the baby, rows and stress can't be good for him in there, after all that last night he stopped moving for quite a while, I told DP (as I was worried) and he told me I had probably scared him to death with all my shouting . He hasn't bothered to find out if things are ok with him today (which they are)
I have a fair idea that this argument is to do with all the stress we are starting to feel (well I know I am anyway) about trying to move house next month and the iminent arrival of our baby. When life gets a bit tougher we always seem to take it out on the other which is a shame really. What I would really like to know is would you apologise? I know I acted unreasonably but this behaviour on his part is not acceptable to me and by apologising I am letting it pass IYSWIM? It is always normally me who apologises, just because he is incredibly stubborn and I don't like to live my life this way. But I can't help feeling that it is a shame that this is the only day off we could of had together all week and he's taken himself away somewhere rather than try to resolve things.
Oh well, I feel a bit better having had a good moan. Sorry!