Ive been seeing someone for two years now and we meet up roughly every month, sometimes more, sometimes less. We met with friends at a big event in his town. I spoke to his friends who all seemed nice, he spoke to my friends who all said the same about him. It’s long distance (200 miles). We’re both mid-forties. He has an 18 year old daughter, I have no children. We both have good jobs (his is professional and high pressure, with lots of national travel while mine isn’t).
That’s the background, this is the problem. We only meet up mid-week in hotels paid for by his company, so at no expense to him. We’ve hardly ever met up at the weekend as this is when his daughter stays with him (Fri & Sat). He’s never been to my house and Ive never been to his house.
We’ve now had three holidays; one short luxury break and two long weekends. I’ve paid for all of them at a cost of over £1,800. He always apologises for forgetting to pay me back but then still doesn’t pay me back.
He’s generous otherwise, he pays for the odd dinner or lunch and always buys drinks and pays for taxis. He also buys me things he knows I like such as bottles of Moet.
I wouldn’t mind if I was the one pushing for the holidays but I’m not. He’ll keep mentioning them until I book. If I don’t book then nothing happens, as happened last summer. He’ll go away with his parents and daughter though. They may be booking those holidays though!
He says he’s divorced and I don’t think he’s lying. Ive seen pictures of his home, his friends, family etc. and Ive been involved in a Skype call he made to his parents last year while we were away and they were very nice to me so he’s not keeping me secret. He says he loves me and wants to be with me and is hoping to move closer to me next year.
What would you do in this situation? Just refuse to book anything else and tell him why or carry on making all the arrangements and seeth quietly?
I really like him, otherwise I’d jump to the dump!