Boyfriend has performance anxiety

[butterfly5291]

Hello,
This is my first post on here so I apologise if I don't use the right abbreviations!

My boyfriend is suffering from severe sexual performance anxiety and I don't know how to help him anymore.
We have been together for 5 months and only had sex once, we have discussed it at length most weeks.
It started because I said I didnt orgasm from intercourse, so he said he felt he wasn't doing his "job" because he loves to please. I have tried showing him articles that show it is very common for women not to orgasm from penetrative sex and orgasm is the only goal from sex.
It has developed to him not wanting to do anything sexual because he feels too much pressure to be able to perform. We dont even kiss more than a peck.
He doesn't get fully hard even when masturbating, he said he had got used to doing that (he's been single for about 7 years, just the odd nights here and there). He has even stopped masturbating and watching porn in the hope it would make him more horny around me.
I have tried sexy underwear and it made no difference except destroying my self confidence.
He doesn't want to go the Dr because he is too embarrassed. He has some viagra but is too scared to take it in case it doesn't work.

I have thought about buying him some supplements that are meant to increase your libido and make you feel harder. Does anyone have any experience of these and can recommend any?

I suffer from anxiety myself and have given him some of my techniques to over come including CBT, but I don't know if this is even helpful.

We want to stay together and get married and have family but if we can't overcome this how can that be possible?!

Can anyone offer and advice or support?

Thanks

5 months and thinking of marriage! Much too fast.

Plus you are trying to fix him, way too much work for what should be best stage of any relationship.

he's the first guy that has actually treated me right. - this screamed out to me the reason why you are putting up with this.
However, I had a b/f with ED. I tried all the usual stuff to no avail. He finally plucked up courage to go to the Dr's for Viagra. It worked a dream!
Maybe your guy could try it in private a few times before he's ready to try with you but he has to be 'turned on' for it to work, it doesn't create an instant erection in other words.

He said he will go see a therapist

See? Words again. Look at what he is DOING (or not doing in this case)

And read haffianas Post over and over . Because I bet you he will pull the poor me card to get you to switch back into ‚‘rescuer‘ mode. (Look up codependency and the drama triangle, not because you are codependent but because I have a feeling it is his normal and he will be subconsciously to manoeuvre you into what he sees as your place in the triangle )