Why d some guys cut back texting/responding to texts after having sex?

[themailfail]

Is it as simple as they got what they wanted and now can't be arsed?

Yep

Afraid so. Some of them just like the thrill of the chase and lose interest once they’ve got what they were after.

For some men it means the chase is over they've got what they wanted, sex isn't necessarily an emotional thing for guys. As crude as it may sound, once they have ejaculated they are literally over you, unless there was anything more there initially.

It is, it's like they know they have you. So don't need to make the effort and you will now chase after them.

It also applies to some women, too

Its a safe "just to be clear, this doesnt mean things are serious now" signal. Some people are paranoid the other party are going to read more into sex than they intended (e.g. even in a situation where you have both said you only want something casual one person can get weird and distant because they mistakenly believe the other party is now going to fall for them )

Yep afraid so.

Balls...I seem to be attracting them the last couple of years. It's so mean.

Doesn't mean they aren't interested still. Unless it's no contact at all.

But it is normally due to them not needing to chase anymore

There's still contact, but vastly reduced. It's enough to put me off bothering to meet anyone. I'm nearly 40; I'll be "invisible" soon so what's the point. No dc and too old now.

How soon do you have sex with them

Over a month of seeing them each week; so I don't think I'm jumping into bed with them. It must be just me.

It's not you, men do this. You are still in contact so it's not that you are being ignored or that it's over.

Men just don't continue a chase game or make an effort once they have you. He sees you as having you now. So doesn't need to try as you will you chase him.

I recommend sex on the first date, gets rid of these sorts of guys before wasting too much of your time.

I've had this happen so I sympathise. I was talking with my cousin about dating a couple of years ago. He is a very nice and attractive man. His wife left him briefly a few years ago (I won't go into the reasons here) and he did a bit of online dating. He said he went out with one woman who he massively clicked with, attractive, fun, intelligent - real "marriage material" he said, they ended up sleeping together on the first date and he said he just lost interest - like there was nowhere else for it to go. It was interesting to get a male perspective.

Maybe they just didn't enjoy the shag?

The "invisible" thing is untrue and smacks of desperation to settle down asap. Could that be it? You're possibly coming on too strong too fast irrespective of sex.

Are you friendly with any of them? Anyone you could trust to ask, where you'd get a candid response without being made to feel foolish for asking? Difficult I know.

Why do you think you're going to become invisible soon? You do realise that nothing actually changes on your 40th birthday?

They probably just wanted the shag.. they got it and moved on. It’s really not you, it’s those men , they just weren’t looking for anything beyond that.

The hole is the goal for these w.....ers.

You are independent 40 year old single woman. Enjoy.
My mother always told you should treat men like milk bottles but in reverse. Take them in at night and kick them out in the morning.

I wish I listened to her.

I don’t think it’s mean

Think of it like this.

Their dating profile = their CV
Their first contact = their initial cover letter

First date = job interview and if granted a 2nd date, successful candidate
Subsequent dates = probationary period
First time sex = passed probation

Many people, when told they have passed probation at work, take their foot off the gas and start coasting. They're not making NO effort, but they're doing the minimum required.

You are now seeing this person's "normal" level of investment.

Find yourself a nice geek.

Great analogy!

I've been guilty of interviewing for the role of boyfriend and ending up with someone else's candidates by mistake. .

(That's my excuse anyway )

Just another notch on their bedpost

Mission Accomplished.