what would you do.dh snogged girl infront of me

[moljam]

sorry this may be long!-
this was 3 weeks ago.we were both drunk but i dont see that as an excuse.he claims he doesnt remember,i do.i was stood right near him. .shes 16 and has now taken to hanging round primary school when i pick my children up,which i hate.when it happened i said nothing,just walked away .when we got home we argued but were both drunk-i had sobered up alot after what i saw but still drunk.the next day we argued more,he claimed he has no memory of it but i dont believe him.also he said hes sorry,why be sorry if he doesnt know what happened?i left,taking all 3 children to my mums and said i wanted him to leave so i could return.its not just this 'thing' its lots of other stuff,this was final straw.after 3 nights i was supposed to return home next day to discuss what happens next but as i got in bed that night with 2 of my children i decided i couldnt do that to them and owed to them to atleast try.so thats what were doing.now this girl is hanging round again and its driving me mad.what would you do?

[jeremyvile]

I think you really need to weigh up this incident against what you know of him as a person.

Its easy to see this sort of thing very harshly from a distance (as i do tbh) but only you know this man, whats your gut instinct?

[FlamingTomatoes]

Go and speak to the girl's dad about this.

[fireflyfairy2]

I know if it were my 16yr old that was snogged by a 40 yr old, dh would have had plenty to say!

I can't believe he has the balls to say he doesn't remember what happened... he obviously does.

I don't blame the 16yr old actually, it is him who has a partner & children.

I'd talk to him about the future & make it clear that any more shit & you won't have one together!

[smalltowngirl]

I find it a bit hard to believe that he didn't remember that his wife was at a party with him, possibly stood next to him, let alone the fact that he snogged the face off a child.
I assume that she is very attractive and looks much older than 16?
You say that this is in a long list of ongoing problems. Can you share them with us to paint us a bigger picture.

[krazykoolkazza]

I think Jeremy Kyle would like to hear about this one...

[moljam]

sorry had to see to children,but wanted to reply to some posts.

smalltowngirl-no i dont think shes that attractive really.the other problems in short are-he cannot speak nicely to me,shows me no respect,told me he was paying bills but wasnt,lied about where moneys going(since found out he has loans/debts he didnt want to mentionso risked having us chucked out of house,does bugger all with us as family.

fireflyfairy2 -i dont really blame her either,like you said hes the one whos married with kids,she has nothing to lose he has.it was probably bit of fun for her.i am angry however thats shes hanging round.

FlamingTomatoes -she doesnt have a dad about.

jeremyvile-my gut instinct is that hes good dad but not so good husband.

Xenia-i am back home,were 'trying to work things out'.we do not have problem with drink,it was a very rare night out.one that i dont think will happen again soon

frapachino-if she was same age as myself or dh it would make no difference.its what he did not who he did it with.

[moljam]

btw krazykoolkazza,thanks.

[sparklygothkat]

I would cut off his bolloxs and shove them down his throat..
FFS 16!!!!!

[contentiouscat]

Of course she doesnt have a Dad about, 16 year old girls who snog 40 year olds rarely do.

I wouldnt end a longe term marriage over the kiss alone but he doesnt sound like that much of a prize to me - how amazing he thinks he can get away with this in front of you.

Id suggest you start paying your bills by direct debit if he cant be trusted to behave like an adult.

[moljam]

we have seperate accounts.the only money i have each month is child benefit and tax credits.im a sahm.i pay water,council tax,3 shared bills and bit of rent.he works full time and pays the rest(supposedly).
when i found out about not paying bills i said i would treat him as child as he acted like one,i asked for all the bills and his wages.he handed over bills but no money.

[HappyDaddy]

The kiss is the least of your issues, then. He clearly doesn't want to be married with kids, so why should he be? He's acting like a child. Where does all his money go?

This is one of the few times I'd definately say, chuck his worthless arse out.

Kick him in the cock first, though.

[frapachino]

Good dad not a good husband - then you deserve better. Solicitors offer free session go and see one and sort it out - you deserve better. Good luck!

[Highlander]

are you sure she's actually 16? Let's face it, he's not far from being on the sex offenders' register is he?

Put like that, how does he feel?

[lou33]

my mum caught my father having an affair with a 16 yr old when he was 40, and she still didnt boot him out for ages

[moljam]

sorry have stayed away from thread as trying to think.what did your mum do?did they eventually split because of it?

[AnAngelWithin]

how are you now moljam?

reriginal post, i would cut his nuts off and stamp on them in the gutter!!

[AnAngelWithin]

where did that face come from?? sorry

[moljam]

ok.ive put things to back of my mind which i know is wrong thing to do but weve got to come up with £2000 by end of august so stressing enough about that at the moment without worrying about anything else.

[tiredemma]

Good Lord.

My Dp would have trouble walking and have to feed through a straw for the rest of his days if he tried to pull a (pathetic) stunt like this.

Where was this at? If she is 16 surely she wasnt drinking with you?

Im horrified at a 40 yr old 'snogging' a 16 yr old girl.
Like something off the bloody Jeremy Kyle show.