I think he might propose and I'm unsure.

[GirlOnIt]

I've got a suspicion my Dp is going to propose and I'm just not sure if I want him to or not.
We live together and have a Ds and when we bought our house we both said we wanted to get married some day. Then I found out I was pregnant and he asked me if I wanted to get married before the baby arrived, that sounds so outdated I know. I said I didn't, but I definitely wanted to at some point and I really felt that.

I imagine us getting married someday and I love him. But the thought that he might ask is freaking me out a bit.
I wondered if it was a surprise proposal did the answer just come naturally for others or was it something you had to think about first?
Is it quite normal to feel a bit weird at the thought of it? I'm not sure if it's actually marriage or him proposing that's making me feel weird. I'd maybe rather we just discussed it and agreed to do it. But then I kinda said I wanted a proposal when he asked when I was pregnant.

Ds is only three months so I don't think the baby hormones are helping much. And we've had some adjusting to do in our relationship since Ds arrived so I know I'm not feeling we're the best we've ever been. But then I imagine that's normal with a new baby.

I'm honestly not sure what I'm feeling Parthenope. If it's him, me or just the baby hormones.
I think it's mostly just the timing, Ds is still only tiny and we've obviously had our struggles. Thing is I want a proposal, not to just agree we'll get married. I do want something special (not public). And when he asked when I was pregnant I was a bit hurt he only asked in 'do you want to before the baby, kinda way'.

I think if he mentions something obvious, I might say "if you're planning on proposing, don't now's not the right time".
I wonder if that will stop him asking ever thought, but then I guess I could always ask him instead.

His “proposal” was lacklustre, sure, but IMO it’s the relationship overall that’s important. Sounds like you’re not very happy with and don’t want to be married to him.

What will be your full time equivalent hours, 0.8? That’s still part time. It sounds like you, already the lower earner, are making much bigger changes at work in order to parent, while DP remains FT. That is unwise when you’re not married. You will be facilitating his earnings.

I might not have to reduce at all if I can make the hours up for home Loopy. If I can't I'm reducing by 7 hours. What we save in two days childcare definitely makes up for my reduced pay though. He earns more, but his changes where as mines set and his will be reduced by doing shorter days too. Although he'll probably be able to make his up by the working the odd weekend.

Before Ds I'd have said yes I definitely would marry him and we were very happy and are now. I think it is how he was behaving that's just made me think, what if he's not the guy I though he was. He's not doing anything wrong now so I think it's just time that I need for him to show me that was just a blip and not who he is. He's never given me reason to doubt him before, he's really always been such a good supportive partner.