Not sure whether emotional affair and how to check deleted msgs?

[Paranoiasettingin]

NC for this. My dh has been texting a lot over the past few days ( since his office party in fact which ended late but I know he came straight home but cant say how I know here) Have checked his phone. There is a msg from him to a work colleague which doesnt say anything but theres no replies. I think he has deleted them. He has never mentioned her name before. I could be wrong but my spidey senses are tingling. He is jealous of a male friend if mine who goes to a club that I go to. We are only friends and thats it point blank. Im not particularly happy in my marriage. My question is how can I check if there are deleted msgs or is there anything I can put on his phone do I can check before hes deleted them? Hes never cheated before ( he would hate anyone to find out ) He doesnt really have the opportunity but he has lied about unrelated things before and so I dont trust him. I just want to be prepared incase this is something that could develop so that I can get my ducks in a row as I have 2 teenagers. He has said that he will leave me a few times but hasnt had the guts to ( I wish he would!- Im not in a position to) but he might if he found someone else as he doesnt like being alone. Any advice welcome. Thanks.

This is timeline.

It shows where you've been for any devices you have which are logged into any kind of Google account (eg gmail)

www.google.com/maps/timeline

If you do the same thing on any device your DH is logged into, you'll see his timeline unless he doesn't stay logged into any Google services.

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue pretty standard to check phones if you suspect cheating tbh

Invading your partners privacy being seen as standard is a sad reflection of our current society.

No axe to grind, it is simply unacceptable to think you have any right to snoop through someone else’s things.

Even if they're cheating on you?

I disagree.

Of course even if they’re cheating on you.

And yes, I’m quite aware a lot of people disagree. That’s why it’s a sad reflection of our society. If you don’t trust your partner and need to snoop, the relationship is dead and you need to leave.

Whether he’s cheating or not, you don’t seem to like your husband much so why don’t you leave? It doesn’t sound like a healthy environment to be raising your teens in.

I don’t think there is a way of checking deleted messages. What about iCloud storage if he uses an iPhone?

You might get some better advice about the underlying issues here if you were able to say what the message actually said and how you know he came straight home after the party.

I'm not disappointed nor do I have an axe to grind!!!!

I just think if you are as unhappy as you sound in your relationship, why you don't put you energy into leaving, does it matter if he's cheating or not.

Have got family and friends that you can talk to and help support you?